Mutu 28

Kodi Ndingapewe Bwanji Mtima Wofuna Kugonana ndi Amuna Kapena Akazi Anzanga?

“Ndisanakwanitse zaka 20, ndinkakopeka ndi amuna anzanga. Koma ndinkadziwa ndithu kuti zimenezi zinali zolakwika.”—Anatero Olef.

“Ndinkapsompsonana ndi mtsikana mnzanga. Koma popeza kuti ndinkakondanso anyamata, ndinayamba kuganiza kuti mwina ndili ndi vuto lofuna kugonana ndi onse, amuna komanso akazi anzanga.”—Anatero Sarah.

ZAKA 30 kapena 40 zapitazo anthu ankachita manyazi kulankhula nkhani za khalidwe logonana amuna kapena akazi okhaokha, koma masiku ano nkhani zimenezi zimalankhulidwa paliponse. Ndipo ngati mutayesa kulankhula zotsutsa khalidwe limeneli, anthu angadane nanu kwambiri. Mtsikana wina wazaka 16, dzina lake Amy, anati: “Mnzanga wina anandinena kuti ndine watsankho. Iye amaona kuti munthu amene amadana ndi anthu akhalidwe logonana amuna kapena akazi okhaokha, n’chimodzimodzi ndi munthu amene amadana ndi anthu amitundu ina.”

Achinyamata ambiri amachita khalidweli chifukwa chakuti palibe amene amawaletsa. Mtsikana wina wazaka 15, dzina lake Becky, anati: “Atsikana ambiri kusukulu kwathu amanena kuti amafuna kugonana ndi akazi anzawo, ndipo ena amati amafuna kugonana ndi aliyense, kaya ndi mkazi kapena mwamuna.” Mtsikana winanso, wazaka 18, dzina lake Christa anati zimenezi zimachitikanso kusukulu kwawo. Iye ananena kuti: “Ndafunsiridwapo ndi  atsikana awiri a m’kalasi mwanga. Mmodzi anandilembera kalata yondipempha kugona naye kuti ndilawe kugonana ndi mtsikana mnzanga.”

Popeza kuti anthu amalankhula momasuka za kugonana kwa akazi kapena amuna okhaokha, mwina mungadzifunse kuti: ‘Kodi khalidweli n’loipadi? Nanga bwanji ngati ndayamba kukopeka ndi mkazi kapena mwamuna mnzanga? Kodi zikutanthauza kuti ndili ndi khalidwe logonana ndi amuna kapena akazi anzanga?’

Kodi Mulungu Amaliona Bwanji Khalidweli?

Anthu ambiri masiku ano, ngakhale atsogoleri azipembedzo, amati kugonana kwa amuna kapena akazi okhaokha kulibe vuto. Koma Mawu a Mulungu amanena momveka bwino kuti khalidweli n’losayenera. Amatiuza kuti Yehova Mulungu analenga mwamuna ndi mkazi, ndipo anafuna kuti kugonana kuzichitika pakati pa mkazi ndi mwamuna wake basi. (Genesis 1:27, 28; 2:24) Choncho n’zosadabwitsa kuti Baibulo limaletsa kugonana kwa akazi kapena amuna okhaokha.—Aroma 1:26, 27.

Komabe anthu ena amanena kuti Baibulo ndi lachikale kwambiri. Kodi mukuganiza kuti n’chifukwa chiyani anthu ambiri amaganiza choncho? N’chifukwa choti kawirikawiri zimene Baibulo limanena zimasemphana ndi zimene iwowo amafuna. Ndipo maganizo a anthu amenewa si olondola ngakhale pang’ono, choncho tiyenera kuwapewa.

Koma bwanji ngati mwayamba kukopeka ndi mkazi kapena mwamuna mnzanu? Kodi zimenezi zikutanthauza kuti muli ndi mtima wofuna kugonana ndi amuna kapena akazi anzanu? Ayi, kumbukirani kuti muli “pachimake pa unyamata.” Panthawi imeneyi, chilakolako chofuna kugonana chimangobwera chokha ngakhale musanaganizire n’komwe zogonana. (1 Akorinto 7:36) Ngati nthawi zina mumakopeka ndi mwamuna kapena mkazi mnzanu  musafulumire kuganiza kuti muli ndi vuto. Nthawi zambiri zimenezi zimatha zokha. Komabe panopo muyenera kupewa khalidweli. Koma kodi mungalipewe bwanji?

Muzipemphera. Muzipemphera kwa Yehova ngati mmene anachitira Davide. Iye anati: “Mundisanthule, Mulungu, nimudziwe mtima wanga; mundiyese nimudziwe zolingalira zanga. Ndipo mupenye ngati ndili nawo mayendedwe oipa, nimunditsogolere pa njira yosatha.” (Salmo 139:23, 24) Yehova angakuthandizeni pokupatsani mtendere “wopambana luntha lonse la kulingalira,” ndipo zimenezi ‘zidzateteza mtima wanu ndi maganizo anu,’ komanso kukupatsani “mphamvu yoposa yachibadwa.” Motero mudzapewa kutsatira zilakolako zoipa.—Afilipi 4:6, 7; 2 Akorinto 4:7.

Muziganizira zinthu zoyenera. (Afilipi 4:8) Muziwerenga Baibulo tsiku lililonse. Dziwani kuti Baibulo lingakuthandizeni kukhala ndi maganizo oyenera ndiponso mtima wabwino. (Aheberi 4:12) Mnyamata wina dzina lake Jason anati: “Malemba ngati 1 Akorinto 6:9, 10 ndi Aefeso 5:3 andithandiza kwambiri. Ndimawerenga malembawa ndikangoyamba kuganizira zinthu zoipa.”

Pewani kuonera zolaula ndiponso zilizonse zolimbikitsa kugonana kwa amuna kapena akazi okhaokha. (Akolose 3:5) Pewani chilichonse chimene chingakuchititseni kuti muyambe kuganizira zogonana. Zinthu zimenezi ndi monga zinthu zolaula,  mapulogalamu ndi mafilimu ena a pa TV, ndiponso magazini ojambula anthu otchuka omwe amavala mosadzilemekeza. Siyani kuganizira zinthu zoipa n’kuyamba kuganizira zinthu zabwino. Mnyamata wina anati: “Ndikangoyamba kuganizira zogonana ndi mwamuna mnzanga, ndimasinkhasinkha lemba langa lapamtima.”

Komabe ena amaona kuti kugonana ndi mwamuna kapena mkazi mnzako kulibe vuto lililonse ndipo amati ‘munthu ayenera kutsatira zimene mtima wake ukufuna.’ Koma Baibulo limasonyeza kuti munthu atha kusintha maganizo ake pankhani imeneyi. Mwachitsanzo, limanena kuti Akhristu ena omwe anali ndi khalidweli anasintha. (1 Akorinto 6:9-11) Ngakhale ngati inuyo simuchita zimenezi koma mumangoziganizira, mungathenso kusintha.

Koma kodi mungatani ngati chilakolako chofuna kugonana ndi mwamuna kapena mkazi mnzanu chikupitirira? Musagonje. Yehova amadana ndi munthu wochita khalidweli. Komabe munthu amene ali ndi vuto limeneli angathe kulithetsa. Zili kwa iye kusankha kuchita kapena kusachita zofuna za mtima wake.

Mwachitsanzo, taganizirani za munthu yemwe kale anali “waukali.” (Miyambo 29:22) Asanaphunzire Baibulo sankachedwa kupsa mtima, koma ataliphunzira anayamba kudziletsa. Koma kodi zimenezi zikutanthauza kuti munthu ameneyu sangapsenso mtima? Ayi. Koma chifukwa choti akudziwa kuti Baibulo limaletsa khalidweli, iye angayesetse kuugwira mtima.

N’chimodimodzinso ndi munthu amene ali ndi khalidwe lofuna kugonana ndi mkazi kapena mwamuna mnzake. Akaphunzira Baibulo  amasiya. Komabe nthawi zina mtima wofuna kuchita khalidweli ungamubwerere. Koma iye akamaganizira zimene Yehova amanena pankhaniyi, angathe kupeza mphamvu zomuthandiza kuthana ndi khalidweli.

Musagonje

Ngati nthawi zina mumaganizira zogonana ndi mwamuna kapena mkazi mnzanu, mwina mungamve ngati mmene mnyamata wina anamvera, iye anati: “Ndayesetsa kuthetsa maganizo amenewa ndipo ndakhala ndikupemphera kwa Yehova za nkhani imeneyi. Ndimawerenga Baibulo ndiponso ndakhala ndikumvetsera nkhani zambiri zokhudza vutoli. Koma mpaka pano sindikudziwa kuti ndigwire mtengo wanji.”

Ngati inunso muli ndi vuto limeneli, ndiye kuti muli pankhondo yaikulu. Dziwani kuti palibe njira yachidule yothetsera vutoli. Komabe, aliyense amene akufuna kusangalatsa Mulungu ayenera kutsatira malangizo ake ndi kupewa makhalidwe oipa ngakhale kuti kuchita zimenezi n’kovuta kwambiri. Musaiwale kuti Mulungu  amadziwa bwino mavuto amene mukukumana nawo. Ndiponso iye amamvera chisoni anthu amene amamutumikira. * (1 Yohane 3:19, 20) Mulungu adzakudalitsani ngati mutsatira malamulo ake. Ndipotu munthu akamatsatira malamulo a Mulungu amapeza “mphotho yaikulu.” (Salmo 19:11) Ndiponso panopo mungakhale osangalala ngakhale kuti tikukhala m’dziko loipali.

Choncho dalirani Mulungu ndipo yesetsani kulimbana ndi zilakolako zimenezi. (Agalatiya 6:9) Yesetsani ‘kunyansidwa ndi choipa,’ ndipo ‘gwiritsitsani chabwino.’ (Aroma 12:9) Mukamayesetsa kulimbana ndi zilakolako zoipa, m’kupita kwanthawi mudzapambana. Koma chosangalatsa kwambiri n’chakuti, mukapewa kugonana ndi mwamuna kapena mkazi mnzanu, mudzalandira moyo wosatha m’dziko lolungama la Mulungu.

M’MUTU WOTSATIRA

Kodi mungatani kuti musamangoganiza za anyamata kapena atsikana?

[Mawu a M’munsi]

LEMBA LOFUNIKA

“Mundisanthule, Mulungu, nimudziwe mtima wanga; mundiyese nimudziwe zolingalira zanga. Ndipo mupenye ngati ndili nawo mayendedwe oipa.”—Salmo 139:23, 24.

MFUNDO YOTHANDIZA

Kuti mudziwe zimene mwamuna ayenera kuchita, werengani nkhani ya Yesu. (1 Petulo 2:21) Iye ndi chitsanzo chabwino kwambiri cha zimene amuna ayenera kuchita ndi zimene sayenera kuchita.

KODI MUKUDZIWA . . . ?

Nthawi zina simungathe kudziletsa kulakalaka zinthu zinazake, koma mungathe kudziletsa kuti musachite zimene mukulakalakazo. Zili ndi inu kusankha kuti musachite zoipa.

ZOTI NDICHITE

Munthu wina akandifunsa chifukwa chimene Baibulo limaletsera kugonana kwa amuna kapena akazi okhaokha, ndidzamuyankha kuti: ․․․․․

Ngati wina atandiuza kuti Baibulo ndi lachikale, ndingamuthandize pomuuza kuti: ․․․․․

Zimene ndikufuna kufunsa makolo anga pankhaniyi ndi izi: ․․․․․

MUKUGANIZA BWANJI?

● N’chifukwa chiyani Mulungu amadana ndi khalidwe logonana amuna kapena akazi okhaokha?

● Kodi mungatani kuti mupewe kugonana ndi mwamuna kapena mkazi mnzanu?

● Kodi mukamadana ndi khalidwe logonana ndi amuna kapena akazi anzanu ndiye kuti mukuwasala anthu ochita khalidweli?

[Mawu Otsindika patsamba 236]

“Panthawi ina maganizo anga pankhani ya kugonana anasokonezeka chifukwa chotsatira dzikoli. Koma masiku ano ndimakaniratu chilichonse kapena munthu aliyense amene amalimbikitsa kugonana kwa amuna kapena akazi okhaokha.”—Anatero Anna

[Chithunzi patsamba 233]

Achinyamata nonse muyenera kusankha, kaya kutsatira maganizo olakwika a dzikoli pankhani ya kugonana kapena kutsatira malangizo opezeka m’Mawu a Mulungu