Mutu 31

Kodi Ndingatani Ngati Chibwenzi Chatha?

“Takhala tikucheza kwa zaka 5 ndipo tinakhala pa chibwenzi kwa miyezi 6. Koma pamene ankafuna kuthetsa chibwenzi chathu sanachite kubwera kudzandiuza kuti chatha. Anangosiya kundilankhulitsa. Ndinasokonezeka kwambiri. Zinandikhumudwitsa kwambiri moti ndinkangokhalira kudzifunsa kuti, ‘Kodi ndinamulakwira chiyani?’”​—Anatero Rachel.

 KUTHA kwa chibwenzi kungachititse kuti muzingokhala okhumudwa. Taganizirani zimene zinachitikira Jeff ndi Susan amene anali pa chibwenzi kwa zaka ziwiri. Pa nthawi yonseyi chikondi chawo chinkakula. Tsiku lonse Jeff ankakhalira kumutumizira Susan mameseji achikondi. Ankamutumiziranso mphatso nthawi ndi nthawi posonyeza kuti amamukonda. Susan ananena kuti: “Jeff ankayesetsa kundimvetsera ndikamalankhula komanso ankaoneka kuti akumvetsa maganizo anga. Ndinkakhala wosangalala kwambiri chifukwa cha zimene ankandichitira.”

Pasanapite nthawi, Jeff ndi Susan anayamba kukambirana zokwatirana komanso kumene azikakhala akadzakwatirana. Anayambanso kukambirana za chinkhoswe. Koma mwadzidzidzi Jeff anangothetsa chibwenzicho. Susan anakhumudwa kwambiri. Ngakhale kuti ankagwirabe ntchito zake za tsiku ndi tsiku analibiretu mphamvu chifukwa chosamvetsa zimene zamuchitikira. Iye anati: “Nkhaniyi inandifoola kwambiri moti ndinkalephera kuganiza bwinobwino.” *

N’chifukwa Chiyani Zimakhala Zopweteka

Ngati munakumanapo ndi zimene zinachitikira Susan, n’kutheka kuti munadzifunsapo kuti, ‘Koma zidzatheka kuiiwala nkhani imeneyi?’ Kukhumudwa kwanu n’komveka chifukwa Mfumu Solomo inalemba kuti: “Chikondi n’champhamvu ngati imfa.” (Nyimbo ya Solomo 8:6) Choncho, kutha kwa chibwenzi ndi chinthu chopweteketsa mtima kwambiri moti zimakhala zovuta kupirira. Ndipotu ena amanena kuti chibwenzi chikatha umamva ngati waferedwa. Ukhoza kukhala ndi maganizo ofanana ndi amene alembedwa m’munsimu:

Kusakhulupirira. ‘Chibwenzi chathu sichingathe chonchi. Ndikukhulupirira kuti asintha maganizo pasanapite nthawi.’

Kukwiya. ‘Sangandichite zimenezi. Panopa sindikufunanso kumuona ngakhale pang’ono.’

Kudzimvera chisoni. ‘Vuto ndi ineyo. Ndiye kuti palibe amene angadzandikondenso.’

Kuvomereza. ‘Ndiiwala pakapita nthawi. N’zoona kuti zikundipweteka  koma bola pano kusiyana ndi poyamba.’

Chinthu chosangalatsa n’choti mukhoza kufika povomereza kuti chibwenzicho chathadi. Koma nthawi imene imadutsa kuti munthu afike povomereza imasiyanasiyana potengera zinthu zingapo kuphatikizapo nthawi imene mwakhala muli pa chibwenzi komanso pamene chibwenzi chanucho chinafika. Koma panopa tiyeni tikambirane zimene mungachite ngati chibwenzi chanu chatha.

Zimene Mungachite

Dziwani kuti vuto lililonse limaiwalika pakapita nthawi. Mawu amenewa sangaoneke oona ngati chibwenzi chanu chatha kumene. Izi zili choncho chifukwa chakuti, chimene chimapangitsa kuti muiwale si nthawi yokhayo. Mwachitsanzo: Ngati mwachekeka penapake pamapola m’kupita kwa nthawi komabe pamapweteka pa nthawi imene mwachekeka kumeneyo. Choncho muyenera kupamanga kuti magazi asapitirire kutaika komanso kuti pasamapweteke kwambiri. Muyeneranso kupatetezera kuti pasalowe majeremusi. Ndi mmenenso zimakhalira ndi bala la mumtima. Panopa zimakhala zopweteka. Koma pali zimene mungachite kuti musamamve kupweteka kwambiri komanso kuti mutetezere mtima wanu kuti musalowe maganizo oipa zomwe  zili ngati kuti mwalowa majeremusi. N’zoona kuti nthawi ikhoza kukuthandizani kuti muchire koma pali zomwe nanunso muyenera kuchita. Yesani zotsatirazi.

● Ngati mukufuna kulira, lirani. Palibe vuto ngati mutalira chifukwa chakuti zinazake sizinayende bwino. Ndipotu Baibulo limanena kuti pali “nthawi yolira” komanso “nthawi yolira mofuula.” (Mlaliki 3:1, 4) Kulira sikutanthauza kuti ndinu wosalimba mtima. Ngakhale Davide, yemwe anali msilikali wolimba mtima, atakumana ndi mavuto ananena kuti: “Usiku wonse ndimanyowetsa bedi langa. Ndimakhathamitsa bedi langa ndi misozi.”​—Salimo 6:6.

● Muzisamalira thanzi lanu. Kuchita masewera olimbitsa thupi ndiponso kudya moyenera kungakuthandizeni kuti mubwezeretse mphamvu zomwe zinachepa chifukwa chosokonezeka ndi kutha kwa chibwenzi chanu. Baibulo limati: “Kuchita masewera olimbitsa thupi n’kopindulitsa.”​—1 Timoteyo 4:8.

Kodi ndi zinthu ziti zokhudza thanzi lanu zimene mukufunika kuzionanso bwino?

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● Muzitanganidwa ndi zinthu zina. Musasiye kuchita zinthu zimene mumasangalala nazo. Ndipo panopa mukufunika kumayesetsa kwambiri kuti musamakhale nokhanokha. (Miyambo 18:1) Kucheza ndi anthu amene amakuganizirani kungakupangitseni kuti maganizo anu azikhalako pa zinthu zabwino.

Lembani zolinga zimene mungakhale nazo.

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 ● Muzipemphera kwa Mulungu n’kumuuza mmene mukumvera. Kuchita zimenezi kukhoza kukhala kovuta chifukwa chibwenzi chikatha anthu ena amayamba kuona kuti Mulungu samawakonda. Iwo amaganiza kuti, ‘Ndakhala ndikupemphera kwa nthawi yaitali kuti ndipeze munthu woyenera, ndiye Mulungu walola bwanji kuti izizi zichitike.’ (Salimo 10:1) Koma kodi ndi bwino kuganiza kuti Mulungu ntchito yake ndi kuthandiza anthu kupeza munthu woyenera kumanga naye banja? Ayi. Ndipotu Mulungu si amene amachititsa kuti munthu wina athetse chibwenzi. Paja timadziwa kuti Yehova ‘amatidera nkhawa.’ (1 Petulo 5:7) Choncho, muzipemphera kwa Mulungu n’kumuuza mmene mukumvera. Baibulo limanena kuti: “Zopempha zanu zidziwike kwa Mulungu. Mukatero, mtendere wa Mulungu umene umaposa kuganiza mozama kulikonse, udzateteza mitima yanu ndi maganizo anu mwa Khristu Yesu.”​—Afilipi 4:6, 7.

Tchulani zinthu zimene mungapemphere kwa Yehova pa nthawi imene mukuvutika chifukwa cha kutha kwa chibwenzi chanu.

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 Muziganizira Zakutsogolo

Pambuyo poti papita nthawi ndipo mwachira bwinobwino, mungachite bwino kuganiziranso mofatsa zimene zinkachitika pa nthawi imene munali pa chibwenziyo. Ngati mukuona kuti ndinu wokonzeka kuchita zimenezi, mukhoza kugwiritsa ntchito mafunso amene ali m’bokosi lakuti, “Kodi Kutha Kwa Chibwenzi Chathu kwandiphunzitsa Chiyani?” lomwe lili patsamba 224.

Ndi zoona kuti chibwenzi chimene munali nachocho sichinayende mmene mumafunira. Koma kumbukirani kuti: Ngati kunja kukugwa mvula yamphamvu kwambiri komanso yamphepo, n’zotheka kuyamba kuganiza kuti siisiya ndipo kunja kuzingokhalabe mdima. Koma pakapita nthawi mvulayo imasiya ndipo kumwamba kumayeranso. Achinyamata amene afotokoza maganizo awo m’nkhaniyi mitima yawo inakhala m’malo m’kupita kwa nthawi. Choncho nanunso musakayikire zoti mtima wanu udzakhala m’malo.

M’MUTU WOTSATIRA

Kodi mungatani kuti mudziteteze kwa anthu amene amagwiririra anzawo?

[Mawu a M’munsi]

LEMBA

“[Yehova] amachiritsa anthu osweka mtima, ndipo amamanga zilonda zawo zopweteka.”​—Salimo 147:3.

MFUNDO YOTHANDIZA

Susan, amene watchulidwa kumayambiriro kwa mutuwu, analemba malemba angapo ndipo amayenda nawo kuti aziwerenga akayambiranso kukhumudwa chifukwa chokumbukira zomwe zinamuchitikira. Nanunso mukhoza kuchita chimodzimodzi ndipo mungasankhe malemba othandiza amene mwapeza mu nkhaniyi.

KODI MUKUDZIWA . . . ?

Anthu ambiri amene amayamba chibwenzi ali ang’onoang’ono samafika pokwatirana, ndipo amene amakwatirana nthawi zambiri ukwati wawo sumalimba.

ZOTI NDICHITE

Kuti ndipitirize kuchita zinthu zanga bwinobwino ngakhale kuti chibwenzi chathu chatha, ndizichita izi: ․․․․․

Kodi ndikufunika kuyesetsa kusintha zinthu ziti kuti chibwenzi changa chotsatira chizidzayenda bwino? ․․․․․

Zimene ndikufuna kufunsa makolo anga pa nkhaniyi ․․․․․

KODI INUYO MUKUGANIZA BWANJI?

● Kodi mmene zinthu zimayendera pa chibwenzi chanu chimene chathachi zakuphunzitsani chiyani?

● Kodi mwaphunzira zotani zokhudza anyamata kapena atsikana?

[Mawu Otsindika patsamba 227]

“M’kupita kwa nthawi mumayamba kuiona nkhaniyo bwinobwino. Kukhumudwa kwanu kumakhala kutachepa moti mumatha kuganizira za nkhaniyo moyenera komanso mumavomereza kuti basi zatha. Mumathanso kudzidziwa bwinobwino komanso kudziwa zinthu zoyenera kuyang’ana mwa munthu amene mukufuna kukhala naye pa chibwenzi ndiponso mumadziwa zinthu zoyenera kupewa mukadzapeza chibwenzi china, n’cholinga choti musadzakumanenso ndi zimene zachitikazi.”​—Anatero Corrina

 [Chithunzi patsamba 224]

Zoti Muchite

Kodi Kutha kwa Chibwenzi Chathu Kwandiphunzitsa Chiyani?

Kodi mnzanuyo anakuuzani chifukwa chake akuthetsa chibwenzicho? Ngati ndi choncho, chilembeni m’munsimu ngakhale mutakhala kuti simunakhutire nacho. ․․․․․

Kodi mukuganiza kuti ndi zinthu zina ziti zimene zinachititsa kuti chibwenzi chanu chithe? ․․․․․

Mukaganizira zomwe zinachitikazo, kodi mukuona kuti pali zinazake zomwe mukanachita zomwe zikanathandiza kuti chibwenzicho chisathe? Ngati zilipo, zilembeni m’munsimu. ․․․․․

Kodi zimene zinachitikazo zakuthandizani kuona mbali zina za moyo wanu zimene mukufunikira kusintha kuti mukhale munthu wabwino komanso Mkhristu wolimba? ․․․․․

Kodi ndi zinthu ziti zimene mukuona kuti simudzachitanso mukadzapeza chibwenzi china? ․․․․․

[Chithunzi patsamba 223]

Kutha kwa chibwenzi kuli ngati bala lopweteka, komabe m’kupita kwa nthawi balalo limapola