Urukundo rw’Imana rugaragarira mu rukundo umugore akunda umwana we

“Mbese umugore yakwibagirwa umwana yonsa, ntababarire uwo yibyariye? Icyakora bo babasha kwibagirwa, ariko jye sinzakwibagirwa.”​—YESAYA 49:15.

SA N’UREBA umubyeyi akikiye uruhinja arimo arwonsa. Ibyo bintu biragaragaza ubwuzu n’urukundo. Umugore witwa Pam yaravuze ati “igihe nateruraga uruhinja rwanjye ku ncuro ya mbere, numvise urukundo runsabye, numva ngomba kurwitaho rwose.”

Ibyo birasa n’aho ari ibintu bisanzwe, ariko ubushakashatsi bwemeje ko urukundo umugore akunda umwana we rugira uruhare runini mu mikurire y’uwo mwana. Porogaramu yita ku Buzima bwo mu Mutwe y’Ishami ry’Umuryango w’Abibumbye ryita ku Buzima yasohoye inyandiko igira iti “ubushakashatsi bwagaragaje ko abana b’intabwa n’abana batandukanyijwe na ba nyina babura ibyishimo, bakiheba ndetse rimwe na rimwe bagahahamuka.” Muri iyo nyandiko havugwamo ubushakashatsi bwerekanye ko abana bagaragarizwa urukundo kandi bakitabwaho bakiri bato cyane, bashobora kugira ubwenge buruta cyane ubw’abatereranywe.

Umwarimu witwa Alan Schore, akaba yigisha isomo ry’ubuvuzi bw’indwara zo mu mutwe mu Ishuri ry’Ubuvuzi ryo muri Kaminuza yo muri Leta Zunze Ubumwe z’Amerika (UCLA), yavuze ibirebana n’akamaro k’urukundo umugore akunda umwana we agira ati “imishyikirano ya mbere y’umwana, ni ukuvuga imishyikirano umwana agirana na nyina, imubera nk’iforomo kubera ko igihe cyose igira uruhare ku bushobozi umuntu agira nyuma yaho bwo gushyikirana  n’abandi mu buryo burangwa n’ibyiyumvo.”

Ikibabaje ni uko indwara, kwiheba cyangwa ibindi bibazo bishobora gutuma umugore atita ku mwana we ndetse akaba “yakwibagirwa umwana yonsa” (Yesaya 49:15). Ariko ibyo ntibisanzwe kubera ko gukunda abana bisa n’aho biri muri kamere y’abagore. Abashakashatsi bavumbuye ko iyo abagore barimo babyara, imisemburo ituma nyababyeyi yiyegeranya kugira ngo umwana avuke yiyongera, kandi na nyuma yaho igatuma umubyeyi agira amashereka. Abantu batekereza ko iyo misemburo, iba mu bagore ndetse n’abagabo, igira uruhare mu gutuma umugore akunda umwana we kandi akamwitaho mu buryo buzira ubwikunde.

Urukundo rwakomotse he?

Abashyigikiye inyigisho y’ubwihindurize bigisha ko urukundo ruzira ubwikunde, urugero nk’uruba hagati y’umwana na nyina, rwabayeho mu buryo bw’impanuka, maze uko abantu bagiye bihinduriza rukagenda rubagumamo kubera ko abarugaragazaga rwabagiriraga akamaro. Urugero, hari ikinyamakuru kiboneka kuri interineti cyagize kiti “igice cya mbere cy’ubwonko bwacu cyaje cyiyongera ku kindi gice cy’ubwonko twarazwe n’ibikururanda twakomotseho, ni ikigenga ibyiyumvo. Icyo gice cy’ubwonko ni cyo gituma abagore bagirana imishyikirano ya bugufi n’abana babo.”—Mothering Magazine.

Ni iby’ukuri ko ubushakashatsi bwagaragaje ko igice cy’ubwonko kigenga ibyiyumvo kigira uruhare rukomeye mu byiyumvo tugaragaza. Ariko se, wumva bishyize mu gaciro kwemera ko urukundo umugore akunda umwana we rwapfuye kwizana rukomotse ku bwonko bw’igikururanda?

Reka dusuzume ibindi bisobanuro bishoboka. Bibiliya ivuga ko abantu baremwe mu ishusho y’Imana, ibyo bikaba bigaragaza ko baremanywe ubushobozi bwo kwigana imico y’Imana (Itangiriro 1:27). Umuco w’ingenzi cyane w’Imana ni urukundo. Intumwa Yohana yaranditse ati “udakunda ntiyigeze amenya Imana.” Kubera iki? “Kuko Imana ari urukundo” (1 Yohana 4:8). Zirikana ko uyu murongo wa Bibiliya utavuga gusa ko Imana ifite urukundo. Ahubwo uvuga ko Imana ari urukundo. Ni yo Soko y’urukundo.

Bibiliya isobanura urukundo muri aya magambo: “urukundo rurihangana kandi rukagira neza. Urukundo ntirugira ishyari, ntirwirarira, ntirwiyemera, ntirwitwara mu buryo buteye isoni, ntirushaka inyungu zarwo, ntirwivumbura. Ntirubika inzika y’inabi rwagiriwe. Ntirwishimira gukiranirwa, ahubwo rwishimira ukuri. Rutwikira byose, rwizera byose, rwiringira byose, rwihanganira byose. Urukundo ntirutsindwa” (1 Abakorinto 13:4-8). None se byaba bihuje n’ubwenge gutekereza ko uwo muco uhebuje waba warabayeho nk’impanuka?

Ibyo bikugiraho izihe ngaruka?

Ese igihe wasomaga ibisobanuro byatanzwe ku rukundo muri paragarafu ibanziriza iyi, wumvaga wifuza ko hagira umuntu ukugaragariza urukundo nk’urwo? Kugira icyifuzo nk’icyo birasanzwe. Kubera iki? Ni ukubera ko “turi urubyaro rw’Imana” (Ibyakozwe 17:29). Twaremanywe icyifuzo cyo gukunda no gukundwa. Kandi dushobora kwiringira ko Imana idukunda cyane (Yohana 3:16; 1 Petero 5:6, 7). Umurongo w’Ibyanditswe wabimburiye iki gice uvuga ko Imana idukunda urukundo rukomeye kandi rurambye kurusha urwo umugore akunda umwana we.

Ariko kandi ushobora kwibaza uti ‘niba Imana ifite ubwenge, imbaraga n’urukundo, kuki idakuraho imibabaro? Kuki ireka abana bagapfa, akarengane kagakomeza, kandi isi igakomeza kwangizwa n’abayifata nabi ndetse n’abanyamururumba?’ Ibyo ni ibibazo byiza kandi byagombye kubonerwa ibisubizo bikwiriye.

Ibyo bibazo ushobora kubibonera ibisubizo bikunyuze nubwo abemeragato bo batabyemera. Abantu babarirwa muri za miriyoni batuye mu bihugu bibarirwa mu magana, babonye ibisubizo byabyo binyuze mu kwigana Bibiliya n’Abahamya ba Yehova. Abanditsi b’iyi gazeti baragutera inkunga yo kubigenza utyo. Uko ugenda urushaho kumenya Imana binyuze mu kwiga Ijambo ryayo no gutekereza ku byo yaremye, uzamenya ko iri hafi yawe kandi ko ushobora kuyimenya. Kandi koko, bishobora kuzatuma wemera udashidikanya ko “itari kure y’umuntu wese muri twe.”—Ibyakozwe 17:27.

[Amagambo yatsindagirijwe yo ku ipaji ya 8]

Urukundo Imana idukunda ruraramba kurusha urwo umugore akunda umwana we