1, 2. Aavali naanona mokukala kwawo ohaya kala yu uvitilathane ngiini, ihe omathimbo gamwe ohaya kala ye na uupyakadhi wuni?

“NATU tye ando owu uvu kutya aavali yoye otaya si ongula, mbela oshike to ka kala wa hala oku ya lombwela nena?” Epulo ndyoka olya li lya pulwa aanona omathele yokoAmerika. Pehala lyokugandja eitulomo kuupyakadhi mboka wu li po nenge kokwaahauvathana hoka tashi vulika ye na, aanona ye thike poopelesenda 95 oya ti kutya otaya ka lombwela aavali yawo kutya “ombili” nosho wo kutya “ondi mu hole noonkondo.” — Embo For Parents Only, lya nyolwa kuShaunti Feldhahn naLisa Rice osho lya popi ngaaka.

² Aanona mokukala kwawo oye hole aavali yawo, naavali oye hole oyana. Shika osho shi li ngaaka unene tuu momagumbo gAakriste. Nonando aavali naanona ohaya kala ya halelela okukala ye na ekwatathano lyopothingo, omathimbo gamwe ihashi kala oshipu kuyo okukundathana. Nokuli nando ohashi vulika ya popye taya lombwelathana oshili noya mangulukilathana, omolwashike iikundathanwa yimwe haye yi henuka thiluthilu? Omandangalati geni hage ya imbi ya kundathane nawa? Ongiini taga vulu okutaagulukwa?

3. (a) Omolwashike momagumbo ogendji ihaashi kala oshipu okukundathana nawa? (b) Omolwashike kaasha li oshidhigu momagumbo gAaisraeli yonale okukala pamwe nokukundathana?

³ Momagumbo ogendji aantu ohaye shi mono oshidhigu okukala ye na ethimbo lyokuninga oonkundathana tadhi ti sha. Ihe hasho sha li ngaaka pethimbo lyonale. Moses okwa li a lombwele aasamane Aaisraeli, a ti: “[Oohapu dhaKalunga] dhi nongeka aamwoye. Dhi hokolola, uuna u li moyaandjeni nuuna u li mepola, uuna to vululukwa nuuna to longo.” (Deut. 6:6, 7) Aanona oya li haya kala nooyina momagumbo nenge noohe momapya nenge kiilonga yawo. Aavali naanona oya li  haya kala ye na ethimbo lya gwana lyokukala pamwe nokukundathana. Shoka osha li hashi pe aavali ompito ya tseye oompumbwe, omahalo nuukwatya woyana. Osha li wo hashi pe aanona ethimbo nompito ya gwana ya tseye nawa aavali yawo.

4. Omolwashike aantu momagumbo ogendji ye na uupyakadhi wokukundathana kunena?

⁴ Onkalamwenyo kunena inayi yooloka ko tuu kwaandjoka yAaisraeli! Miilongo yimwe, aanona ohaya tameke okinda aashona, nomathimbo gamwe ohaya tameke sho ye na owala oomvula mbali. Aavali oyendji kutya nduno aasamane nenge aakulukadhi ohaya longo iilonga yokwiikongela omboloto kokule nomagumbo gawo. Uuna nduno aavali ya mono ethimbo lyokukala noyana, oonkundathana ohadhi yugwa po kokompiuta, ko-TV nosho wo kiinima yilwe yopaelektronika. Olundji, aanona naavali ohaya kala ye na oonkalamwenyo dha yoolokathana; ohaya kala owala ya fa aantu mbeya shivalelwe ya tseyathane nolundji ihaya kundathana naanaa.

5, 6. Ongiini aavali yamwe ya ‘longitha nawa’ ethimbo nenge tu tye ya konga ethimbo opo ya kale haya kala noyana ethimbo olindji?

⁵ Mbela ito vulu ‘okulongitha nawa’ ethimbo nenge tu tye wu konge ethimbo wu kale naanegumbo lyoye ethimbo olindji? (Lesha Aaefeso 5:15, 16.) Momagumbo gamwe aanegumbo oya tokola okukala ye na ongamba mokutala o-TV nomokulongitha okompiuta. Yalwe ohaya kambadhala okulya pamwe nando lumwe esiku kehe. Elongekidho lyelongelokalunga lyuukwanegumbo inali gandja tuu ompito ombwanawa kaavali ya hedhe popepi noyana, nokaanona ya hedhe popepi naavali yawo noya kundathane iinima yopambepo ya mangulukilathana! Okwiikalekela owili yimwe moshiwike kehe okuninga elongelokalunga lyuukwanegumbo otashi ka kala etameko ewanawa, ihe opo pu kale oonkundathana dhomuule, oya pumbwa okulongitha ethimbo olindji. Onkee ano, oonkundathana dhakehe esiku odhi li oshitegelwa. Manga okamwoye inaaka ya kosikola, ka lombwela sha shoka tashi ka tsu omukumo, kundathaneni enyolo lyesiku, nenge mu galikane pamwe. Okuninga ngaaka otaku ke ka kwathela noonkondo momukokomoko gwesiku.

⁶ Aavali yamwe oya ninga omalunduluko moonkalamwenyo dhawo opo ya vule okukala ethimbo olindji noyana. Pashiholelwa, Laura, * omuvalakadhi  gwaanona yaali aashona, okwa thigi po iilonga ye omolwetompelo ndika. Okwa ti: “Ongulonene kehe atuhe otwa li owala hatu kala twi ihila kiilonga nenge kosikola. Ngele nda galukile kegumbo kongulohi, aamwandje onda li handi adha ya langekwa nale komuleli gwawo. Sho nde etha iilonga oshe tu ningitha tu kale tu na oshimaliwa oshishona shili, ihe ngashingeyi ondi uvite lela kutya ondi shi shoka aamwandje taya dhiladhila nosho wo omaupyakadhi gawo. Ohandi pulakene kwaashoka taya popi megalikano notandi vulu oku ya wilika, oku ya ladhipika noku ya longa.”

7. Aanona naavali ohaya nyenyeta olundji kombinga yashike?

⁷ Konima yaasho aanyoli yembo For Parents Only ya ningi omapulapulo ogendji naagundjuka, oya mono kutya opu na natango endangalati limwe ndyoka hali imbi oonkundathana. Oya ti: “Oshinima shotango shoka aanona ya nyenyeta unene kombinga yaavali yawo osho shoka kutya, ‘ihaya pulakene.’” Enyenyeto ndyoka kali li owala ombinga yimwe. Olundji aavali nayo ohaya nyenyeta oshinima sha faathana kombinga yoyana. Opo aantu megumbo ya kale haya kundathana ya mangulukilathana, ayehe megumbo oye na okukala haya pulakenathana lela. — Lesha Jakob 1:19.

8. Ongiini aavali taya vulu okupwilikina nawa uuna oyana taya popi?

⁸ Aavali, ohamu pulakene ngaa lela uuna aanona yeni taya popi? Shika otashi vulu okukala oshidhigu uuna wa loloka nenge uuna shoka okanona taka popi sha fa shanathangwa. Ihe shoka tashi monika shanathangwa kungoye otashi vulika shi kale sha simanenena kokamwoye. Okukala ho ‘pulakene mbala’ inaku hala owala okutya owu na okukala ho pulakene nawa kwaashoka okamwoye taka ti, ihe otashi ikolele wo kunkene take shi popi. Omutono gwewi nosho wo einyengo lyolutu ohayi ulike kutya omugundjuka oku uvite ngiini. Okupula omapulo okwa simana wo. Ombiimbeli oya ti: “Omadhiladhilo momwenyo gwomulumentu ogo omeya omaleeleka, ihe omunandunge ote ga teke mo.” (Omayel. 20:5) Owino noondunge dhokuyoolola odha pumbiwa unene tuu uuna to kambadhala wu kundathane nokamwoye kombinga yoshinima shoka itaa ka kala ka mangulukila.

9. Omolwashike aanona ye na okupulakena kaavali yawo?

⁹ Aanona, mbela ohamu vulika ngaa kaavali yeni? Oohapu dhaKalunga otadhi ti: “Mumwandje, pulakena omakumagidho gaho, ngoye ino ekelahi omapukululo ganyoko.” (Omayel. 1:8) Dhimbulukwa kutya aavali yoye oye ku hole noye ku halela uuwanawa, onkee ano oshi li pandunge wu pulakene nowu vulike kuyo. (Ef. 6:1) Ohashi kala oshipu okuvulika uuna ho kundathana nawa naavali yoye nongele wu shi kutya owu holike. Lombwela aavali yoye nkene wu uvitile iinima. Shika otashi ke ya kwathela ya kale ye ku uvite ko. Uushili owo kutya, nangoye owu na wo okukambadhala wu ya uve ko.

10. Oshike tatu ilongo mehokololo lyOmbiimbeli lyaRehabeam?

¹⁰ Uuna tashi ya pokupulakena komayele ngoka ho pewa koomakula yoye, owa pumbwa okukala wa kotoka. Otashi vulika ye ku lombwele shoka wa hala okuuva, ihe omayele gawo otashi vulika kaage ku kwathele nando. Otashi vulika nokuli ge ku fale moshiponga. Omolwuunongo nowino yaakuluntu ndjoka aagundjuka oyendji ihaaya kala ye na, oyendji ihaya dhiladhila kiilanduliko yoonkatu dhawo. Dhimbulukwa oshiholelwa shaRehabeam omwanamati gwomukwaniilwa Salomo. Sho a li a ningi omukwaniilwa gwaIsraeli, osha li tashi ka kala pandunge kuye a landule omayele gaasamane aakulupe. Pehala lyaashono, okwa li a landula omayele kaage li pandunge gaalumentu aagundjuka mboka a putuka nayo. Naashoka osha li she mu ningitha a kanithe eyambidhidho lyaapangelwa oyendji yuukwaniilwa we. (1 Aak. 12:1-17) Pehala lyokuholela etokolo lyaRehabeam kaali li pandunge, longa nuudhiginini wu kale aluhe ho kundathana naavali yoye we ya mangulukila. Ya lombwela omadhiladhilo goye. Landula omayele gawo ngoye to ilongo kuunongo wawo. — Omayel. 13:20.

11. Oshike tashi vulu okuningwa ngele aavali oya kala inaaya mangulukilwa koyana?

 ¹¹ Aavali, ngele inamu hala aanona yeni ya ka konge omayele koomakula yawo, shi ya ningileni oshipu ya kale ye mu mangulukila. Omumwameme gumwe gwoomvula omulongo nasha okwa nyola a ti: “Shampa owala nda tumbula edhina lyomumati dho omitima dhaavali yandje odha nuka mo. Shoka ohashi ningitha ndje ndi kale inaandi manguluka nokukala inaandi hala okutsikila okupopya.” Omumwameme gulwe omugundjuka okwa nyola a ti: “Aagundjuka oyendji oya hala omayele gaavali yawo, ihe ngele aavali yawo inaya tala ko onkalo yawo kutya oya kwata miiti, nena aanona otaya ka ya kugulwe ngoka ta ka pulakena kuyo, nokuli nokwaamboka kaaye na ontseyo nawa.” Ngele owu na ehalo lyokupulakena nolukeno uuna aamwoye taya popi kombinga yoshinima kehe, otashi vulika wu ka mone kutya oye ku mangulukukila notaya ka taamba ko ewiliko lyoye.

12. Ongiini tashi vulika einyengo lyaavali li ya imbe ya kundathane noyana?

¹² Endangalati ndyoka hali imbi oonkundathana ohali holoka wo uuna aavali yi inyenge nayi omolwoshinima shoka aanona yawo ye ya lombwele. Shoka shu uvitikiwe ko, osho kutya aavali Aakriste oya hala okugamena oyana. ‘Omasiku ngaka gahugunina’ ogu udha iinima mbyoka tayi tula uupambepo wetu moshiponga. (2 Tim. 3:1-5) Ihe sho aanona taya gamenwa kaavali yawo otashi vulika ya kale ye wete taya tulwa mondholongo.

13. Omolwashike aavali ye na okukala ya kotoka kaaya kale haya gandja omataloko gawo nziya?

¹³ Otashi ka kala pandunge kaavali kaaya gandje omataloko gawo nziya. Eeno shili, ihashi kala aluhe oshipu wu mwene uuna omumwoye te ku lombwele sha tashi nikitha oluhodhi. Ihe osha simana wu pulakene nawa manga inoo yamukula. Omukwaniilwa omunandunge Salomo okwa li a nyola a ti: “Ngoka ta yamukula, manga inaa uva, otashi mu nikile uugoya notashi mu sitha ohoni.” (Prov. 18:13) Ngele owa kala wa ngungumana, oto ka uva oshindji, naamwoye otaya ka tsikila okupopya. Owu na okuuva ehokololo alihe opo wu kale to vulu okukwathela. Omolwomutima gwokanona ngoka gu li mengwangwano otaka vulu okupopya ‘oohapu inaadhi dhiladhilwa nawa.’ (Job 6:1-3) Wu li omuvali omunahole longitha omakutsi goye wu tseye oshindji kombinga yomumwoye ngoye to longitha wo elaka lyoye wu mu aludhe.

14. Omolwashike aanona ye na okukala hayi ikwata mokupopya?

¹⁴ Aanona, omwa pumbwa okukala hamu “ikwata mokupopya,” kamu na okukala hamu pataneke meendelelo shoka aavali yeni ya ti, molwaashoka oye na oshinakugwanithwa ye shi pewa kuKalunga shoku mu dheula. (Omayel. 22:6) Otashi vulika ya pita moonkalo dha fa ndhoka wu li mu dho ngashingeyi. Kakele kaashono, ohayi ipe uusama omolwomapuko ngoka ya ninga sho ya li aagundjuka noya halelela oku ku gamena kuu ninge omapuko ga fa gawo. Onkee ano, kala wa tala ko aavali yoye ye li ookuume koye ihe kaye shi aatondi yoye; ye li aagandjimayele, ihe kaye shi aakondjithi yoye. (Lesha Omayeletumbulo 1:5.) “Simaneka ho nanyoko,” noku ya ulukila kutya owu ya hole ngaashi yo ye ku hole. Shoka otashi ke shi ninga oshipu kuyo ya vule ‘oku ku putudha noku ku kumagidha paukriste.’ — Ef. 6:2, 4.

15. Oshike tashi ke tu kwathela kaatu kanithe eidhidhimiko nokaatu kale twa geyela mboka tu hole?

¹⁵ Haaluhe hatu tala onteni mboka tu hole. Omuyapostoli Paulus okwa li a ‘nyolele aantu yaKalunga ye li muKolossa naamwameme aainekelwa muKristus,’ a ti: “Aalumentu, holeni aakiintu yeni, ne inamu kala mu na onyanya nayo. . . Aakuluntu, inamu hinda aana yeni, opo yaa kanithe einekelo.” (Kol. 1:1, 2; 3:19, 21) Paulus okwa li a kumagidha Aaefeso a ti: “Etheni ano uululu auhe, ondjahi nonkone, omakudhilo nenge omatukano.” (Ef. 4:31) Ngele otwa kokeke uukwatya weidhidhimiko, wuunambili, noweikwatonawa, uukwatya mboka wu li oshiyimati shombepo yaKalunga, otashi ke tu kwathela tu kale twa ngungumana  nokuli nuuna tu na uupyakadhi. — Gal. 5:22, 23.

16. Jesus okwa li a pukulula ngiini aalongwa ye, nomolwashike shika sha li oshindhindhilikwedhi?

¹⁶ Tala koshiholelwa shaJesus. Dhiladhila kunkene omutima gwe gwa li gwa gwililwa po kuudhigu sho a li puulalelo we wahugunina naayapostoli ye. Jesus okwa li e shi kutya moowili dhi li popepi okwa li ta ka sa eso li uvitha omwenyo omutoye. Okuyapulithwa kwedhina lyaHe nosho wo ehupitho lyaantu okwa li kwi ikolelela kokukala kwe omudhiginini. Ihe puulalelo opo tuu mpoka, “mokati kaalongwa omwa penduka edhiladhilo kutya olye ngoka e na okutalwa omukuluntu e vule ooyakwawo ayehe.” Jesus ine ya gandagula nenge u ulike kutya okwe ya geyela. Ihe pehala lyaashono, okwa li a tompathana nayo nengungumano. Jesus okwa li e ya dhimbulukitha kutya oya kala pamwe naye momamakelo ge agehe. Nonando Satana okwa li a hala e ya makele ayehe, ngaashi omukiintu ta yele iilya polupale, Jesus okwa li u ulike kutya okwi inekela kutya oya li taya ka kala aadhiginini. Okwa li nokuli a ningi ehangano nayo. — Luk. 22:24-32.

17. Oshike tashi ka kwathela aanona ya kale ya ngungumana?

¹⁷ Aanona nayo oya pumbwa okukala ya ngungumana. Unene tuu ngele ya thiki mepipi lyoomvula omulongo nasha, otashi vulika ya kale ye wete kutya ewiliko lyaavali yawo otali ulike kutya inaye ya inekela. Nonando omathimbo gamwe otashi vulika osho shi kale tashi monika ngawo, dhimbulukwa kutya sho aavali yoye ye na ko nasha nangoye omolwaashoka ye ku hole. Okupulakena kuyo wa ngungumana nokulongela kumwe nayo, otashi ke ya ningitha ya kale ye ku simaneka noto ki iningila edhina ewanawa lyokukala omuntu e na oshinakugwanithwa monkalamwenyo. Eihumbato lya tya ngaaka otali ke ku ningitha wu pewe emanguluko olindji miinima yontumba monkalamwenyo yoye. Okukala neikwato nawa otaku ka ulika kutya owu na uunongo. Eyeletumbulo limwe otali ti: “Omugoya ota mana mo ondjahi ye ayihe, ihe omunawino ohi ikwata.” — Omayel. 29:11.

18. Ongiini ohole hayi ningitha aanegumbo ya kale haya kundathana nawa?

¹⁸ Ano aavali aaholike naanona aaholike, ngele maandjeni ihamu kundathana mwa mangulukilathana ngaashi mwa hala shi kale, inamu teka omukumo. Kaleni tamu longo nuudhiginini mu hwepopale, nokutsikila okweenda moshili. (3 Joh. 4) Muuyuni uupe, aantu ya gwanenena otaya ka vula okweendathana nopwaahe na okukala kaayu uvitathane nosho wo okungwandjagulathana. Ngashingeyi atuheni ohatu ningi iinima mbyoka hatu ki ipela uusama konima. Onkee ano, kala ho gandja ombili nopwaahe na okukwatakwata. Kala ho dhimine po. ‘Ohole yeni nayi kale ya kwatakanithwa kumwe.’ (Kol. 2:2) Ohole oyi na oonkondo. ‘Ohole ohayi idhidhimikile ayihe noyi na olukeno. Ihayi ningi omwenyo omwiinayi, yo ihayi dhimbulukwa uuwinayi ye u ningilwa. Ohole ihayi tonyala, ihe otayi itaale, tayi tegamene e tayi idhidhimike sigo okehulilo.’ (1 Kor. 13:4-7) Kaleni nokukokeka uukwatya wohole noonkundathana dheni otadhi ka kala oombwanawa, tadhi eta enyanyu megumbo lyeni notadhi ka simanekitha Jehova.