Nobazyali Alimwi Anobana—kamubandika Caluyando

“Muntu woonse weelede kufwambaana kuswiilila, kumuka kwaambaula, kumuka kukalala.”—JAK. 1:19.

INO INGA MWAINGULA BUTI?

Nkaambo nzi ncociyandika kapati kujana ciindi cakubandika?

Ino bazyali inga balubelesya buti lugwalo lwa Jakobo 1:19?

Ino bana inga balubelesya buti lugwalo lwa Jakobo 1:19?

1, 2. Mbuti bazyali alimwi abana mbobalimvwa kujatikizya umwi amweenzinyina, pele ndipenzi nzi ndyobajana zimwi ziindi?

“IKUTI mwamvwa kuti bazyali banu balafwa juunza, ino ncinzi ncomunga mwayandisisya kubaambila sunu?” Ooyu ngomubuzyo ngobakabuzyigwa bana banji baku United States. Muciindi cakubikkila maano kumapenzi aali woonse ngobakajisi alimwi akuzwangana ikwakaliko, bana ibasika ku 95 pesenti bakaamba kuti inga bayanda kwaambila bazyali babo kuti: “Amundijatile” akuti “Ndilamuyanda kapati.”—For Parents Only, ibbuku lyakalembwa aba Shaunti Feldhahn aba Lisa Rice.

² Kanji-kanji, bana balabayanda bazyali babo, alimwi abalo bazyali balabayanda bana babo. Eeci ncamasimpe kwaambisya mumikwasyi ya Banakristo. Nokuba kuti bazyali abana balayanda kuti kabamvwana kapati, zimwi ziindi kubandika akati kabo cilakatazya. Neliba leelyo kubandika cakwaanguluka nocitakatazyi, nkaambo nzi makani amwi ncaatabandikwi? Ino zyintu nzi zimwi zikonzya kupa kuti kutabi kubandika kubotu? Ino inga twazizunda buti?

AMUJANE CIINDI CAKUBANDIKA

3. (a) Nkaambo nzi kubandika kabotu ncocikatazya mumikwasyi minji? (b) Nkaambo nzi mikwasyi yamu Israyeli wansiku ncoyatakajisi penzi lyakujana ciindi cakuba antoomwe?

³ Mikwasyi minji yajana kuti cilakatazya kujana ciindi cinji cakubandika kabotu. Tiicakali boobu lyoonse. Musa wakalailila bamausyi bana Israyeli kuti: “Muleelede kwaaisya bana banu [majwi aa Leza], akwaambaula ngawo lyoonse, ciindi cakukala muŋanda aciindi cakweenda munzila, ciindi cakoona aciindi cakubuka.” (Dt. 6:6, 7) Bana bakali kukkala buzuba boonse kabali abanyina aŋanda naa abausyi kumyuunda naa kubusena nkobakali kubelekela bausyi. Bazyali alimwi abana bakalijisi ciindi cinji cakukkala antoomwe akubandika.  Aboobo, bazyali bakali kukonzya kuzyiba nzyobakali kuyandika bana babo, nzyobakali kulombozya, alimwi abube bwabo. Mbubwenya buyo, abalo bana bakali kukonzya kubazyiba kabotu bazyali babo.

4. Nkaambo nzi mikwasyi minji mazuba aano ncoijisi penzi lyakujana ciindi cakubandika?

⁴ Eelo kaka buumi mazuba aano buliindene abwakaindi! Muzisi zimwi, bana balatalika kwiiya cikolo kabacili baniini, zimwi ziindi kabajisi buyo myaka yobilo yakuzyalwa. Bunji bwabamausyi abamanyina babelekela kule akumaanda aabo. Ciindi cisyoonto bazyali ncobaba antoomwe abana babo, kanji-kanji cimanina amakkompyuta, aacipeku-peku, alimwi aatuncini tumwi buyo muciindi cakubandika. Mumikwasyi minji, bazyali abana tabazyibene kabotu-kabotu. Kubandika kabotu inga takuko.

5, 6. Mbuti bazyali bamwi mbobajana ciindi cinji cakuba antoomwe abana babo?

⁵ Ino inga mwacibelesya buti ciindi kutegwa mujane ciindi cakuba antoomwe amukwasyi wanu? (Amubale Baefeso 5:15, 16.) Mumikwasyi imwi bazuminana kucesya ciindi cakweebelela cipekupeku naa kucesya ciindi cakubelesya kkompyuta. Bamwi balasola kulida antoomwe mbuli mukwasyi ciindi comwe abuzuba. Eelo kaka tabuliboteli bubambe bwakukomba mumukwasyi bwalo bupa kuti bazyali alimwi abana babe antoomwe akubandika zyintu zyakumuuya! Inga cabota kuba awoola naa kwiinda aawo ansondo, pele zinji zilayandika kutegwa kube kubandika kubotu. Akaambo kaceeco, kubandika lyoonse kulayandika kapati. Kabatanaunka kucikolo bana banu, amwaambe majwi aakulwaizya, amubandike lugwalo lwabuzuba, naa amupaile antoomwe abana banu. Kucita boobo kulakonzya kubagwasya kapati bana banu buzuba oobo.

⁶ Bazyali bamwi bacikonzya kucinca bukkale bwabo kutegwa bajane ciindi cinji cakuba antoomwe abana babo. Mucikozyanyo, ba Laura, * muzyali mukaintu uujisi bana bobilo, wakacesya ciindi cakubeleka mulimo wakumubili kutegwa kajana ciindi cakuba antoomwe abana bakwe. Wakaamba kuti: “Mafwumofwumo toonse twakali kuzuzila kuunka kumulimo naa kucikolo.  Ndapiluka kuŋanda kumangolezya, ndakali kujana mubelesi wabatola kale bana kuyakoona. Akaambo kakuti ndakaleka mulimo, twakeelede kunakubelesya mali masyoonto, pele ndilimvwa kuti lino ndilizizyi nzyobayeeya bana bangu alimwi amapenzi ngobajisi. Ndilaswiilila nzyobaamba mumupailo alimwi ndilakonzya kubagwasya, kubakulwaizya, alimwi akubayiisya.”

‘KAMUFWAMBAANA KUSWIILILA’

7. Ino nditongoosi nzi kanji-kanji ndyobajisi bana alimwi abazyali?

⁷ Nobakamana kubuzya-buzya bakubusi banji, balembi babbuku lyakuti For Parents Only bakajana kaambo kamwi kapa kuti kacikatazya kubandika. Bakaamba kuti: “Tongoosi lipati ndyobajisi bana kujatikizya bazyali babo ndyakuti, ‘Tabaswiilili.’” Tongoosi eeli talili buyo kubana balikke. Abalo bazyali kanji-kanji balatongooka mbubwenya oobu kujatikizya bana babo. Kutegwa kakuli kubandika cakwaanguluka lyoonse, banamukwasyi beelede kuswiilila—kuswiilila ncobeni—kuli umwi amweenzinyina.—Amubale Jakobo 1:19.

8. Mbuti bazyali mbobakozya kubaswiilila ncobeni bana babo?

⁸ Nobazyali, sena mulabaswiilila ncobeni bana banu? Eeci cilakonzya kukatazya kuti kamukatede naa ciindi nomubona mubandi kuti tauyandiki kapati. Pele cintu cilibonya kuti taciyandiki kapati kulindinywe cilakozya kuti kaciyandika kapati kumwanaanu. “Kufwambaana kuswiilila” caamba kubikkila maano kutali buyo kuzyintu nzyaamba mwanaanu pele alimwi ambwazyaamba. Mbolilimvwisya jwi alimwi ambwaboneka, kulakonzya kumugwasya kuzyiba mbwalimvwa mwanaanu. Kubuzya mibuzyo akwalo kulayandika kapati. Ibbaibbele lyaamba kuti: “Makanze aamumoyo wamuntu ali mbuli maanzi malamfu, pele muntu uucenjede ulaayubununa.” (Tus. 20:5) Kumvwisya alimwi abupampu zilayandika kapati ciindi nomugwasya bana banu kujatikizya makani mapati.

9. Nkaambo nzi bana ncobeelede kubaswiilila bazyali babo?

⁹ Nobana, sena mulabamvwida bazyali banu? Ijwi lya Leza lyaamba kuti: “Swiilila, mwanaangu, lulayo lwauso, alimwi utataalazyi mulao wabanyoko.” (Tus. 1:8) Kamuyeeya kuti, bazyali banu balamuyanda kapati alimwi bayanda kumugwasya, aboobo ncabusongo kubaswiilila alimwi akubamvwida. (Ef. 6:1) Ncuubauba kumvwida muntu ikuti kakuli kubandika kubotu alimwi akuti kozyi kuti ulayandwa. Amubaambile bazyali banu mbomulimvwa kujatikizya zyintu zimwi. Eeci ciyakubagwasya kuti bamuzyibe kabotu. Pele andinywe mweelede kusoleka kubazyiba kabotu.

10. Ncinzi ncotwiiya kucibalo camu Bbaibbele cijatikizya Roboamu?

¹⁰ Caboola kumakani aakuswiilila lulayo luzwa kubana bamusela wanu, mweelede kucenjela. Balakonzya kumwaambila ncomuyanda kumvwa, pele lulayo lwabo inga tiilwamugwasya pe. Ambweni lulakonzya kumunjizya mumapenzi. Akaambo kakubula busongo aluzyibo ndobajisi bantu bapati, bunji bwabakubusi tabakonzyi kuzyiba zikonzya kucitika kumbele alimwi tabakonzyi kuzyiba mapenzi aakonzya kuboola akaambo kamicito imwi. Amuyeeye cikozyanyo ca Roboamu mwana wa Mwami Solomoni. Ciindi naakaba mwami wa Israyeli, wakali kuyakuba musongo naakalutobela lulayo lwabantu bapati. Muciindi caboobo, wakatobela lulayo lwabufwubafwuba lwabantu mbaakali kukomena limwi. Aboobo, bantu banji bakaleka kugwasyilizya bwami bwakwe. (1 Bam. 12:1-17) Muciindi cakutobela cikozyanyo ca Roboamu cibyaabi, amusolekesye kunoobandika abazyali banu cakulikwaya. Amubaambile bazyali banu nzyomuyeeya. Amugwasyigwe kululayo lwabo, alimwi amwiiye busongo bwabo.—Tus. 13:20.

11. Ncinzi cikonzya kucitika kuti bazyali kabatasikiliki?

¹¹ Nobazyali, ikuti naa tamuyandi kuti bana banu kabajana lulayo kubananyina,  amube bantu basikilika, batakatazyi kubandika ambabo. Mukubusi umwi mucizyi wakalemba kuti: “Kufwumbwa buyo kuti ndaamba zyina lyamusankwa, bazyali bangu balalibilika. Eeci cindipa kutaanguluka alimwi akuyanda kuleka kubandika.” Aumwi mukubusi mucizyi wakalemba kuti: “Bakubusi banji bayanda lulayo luzwa kubazyali babo, pele kuti bazyali kabatababikkili maano, bana balakonzya kuunka kumuntu uumbi uubabikkila maano, nokuba kubantu aabo batajisi luzyibo.” Ikuti kamubaswiilila bana banu calubomba mumakani aali woonse, muyoojana kuti bayakwaanguluka kubandika andinywe alimwi akutobela busolozi bwanu.

‘KAMUMUKA KWAAMBAULA’

12. Ino mbobacita bazyali kubana babo inga kwapa buti kuti kubandika kukatazye abana babo?

¹² Alimwi kutabandika kabotu kulakonzya kutalika ciindi bazyali nobanyema alimwi akutaambaula kabotu kujatikizya nzyobaamba bana babo. Tacidoonekwi kuti bazyali Banakristo balayanda kukwabilila bana babo. ‘Mazuba aano aamamanino’ azwide ntenda zikonzya kutunyonganya kumuuya. (2 Ti. 3:1-5) Nokuba boobo, cintu bazyali ncobabona kuti cilabakwabilila bana babo, balo bana balakonzya kucibona mbuli kuti bazyali balaciindizya.

13. Nkaambo nzi bazyali ncobeelede kucenjela kujatikizya kwaamba mizeezo yabo cakufwambaana?

¹³ Bazyali inga bacita cabusongo kwiinda mukutafwambaana kwaamba mizeezo yabo. Mubwini, tacili cuubauba lyoonse kuumuna buyo kuti bana banu bamwaambila cintu cityompya. Pele cilayandika kapati kuswiilila kamutanaingula. Mwami musongo Solomoni wakalemba kuti: “Na muntu wavuwa katana kumvwa, mbufubafuba bwakwe ansoni.” (Tus. 18:13) Ikuti mwakkazyika moyo, inga mwamvwa zinji alimwi bana banu balakonzya kuzumanana kwaambaula. Mweelede kwaazyiba kabotu makani oonse mbwaabede kamutanapa lugwasyo. Ambweni cibapa ‘kwaamba cakutayeeya’ nkaambo kakuti balipengede mumoyo. (Job. 6:1-3) Mbuli bazyali basiluyando, amubaswiilile alimwi akusoleka kubamvwisya bana banu kutegwa mukonzye kwaamba zyintu zikonzya kubagwasya.

14. Nkaambo nzi bana ncobeelede kumuka kwaambaula?

¹⁴ Nobana, andinywe mweelede kumuka kwaambaula, tamweelede kufwambaana kukazya nzyobaamba bazyali banu nkaambo bajisi mukuli kuzwa kuli Leza iwakumuyiisya. (Tus. 22:6) Ambweni abalo bakali mubukkale bukozyenye ambomujisi lino. Kuyungizya waawo, ambweni balausa akaambo kakulubizya nkobakacita nobakacili baniini alimwi bayanda kumugwasya kuti mutalubizyi mbubwenya mbuli mbabo. Aboobo, bazyali banu amubabone kuba balongwe banu alimwi basikumugwasya, kutali basikumukazya naa basinkondonyoko. (Amubale Tusimpi 1:5.) “Lemeka bauso abanyoko,” alimwi akubatondezya kuti mulabayanda mbubwenya mbuli mbobamuyanda. Eeci ciyakubagwasya kuti ‘bamulele mululayo lwa Jehova akumuyiisya kutobela mizeezo yakwe.’—Ef. 6:2, 4.

‘KAMUMUKA KUKALALA’

15. Ncinzi cikonzya kutugwasya kukkazyika moyo alimwi akutabanyemena bayandwa besu?

¹⁵ Talili lyoonse notukkazyika moyo kubantu mbotuyanda. Mwaapostolo Paulo wakalembela ‘basalali abakwesu basyomeka ibakamantene a Kilisito ibakali mu Kolose’ kuti: “Nywebo nobalumi, amuzumanane kubayanda bakaintu banu alimwi mutabi alunya kuli mbabo pe. . . . Nywebo nomausyi, mutanoobanyemyi bana banu, kutegwa batatyompwi.” (Kol. 1:1, 2; 3:19, 21) Paulo wakakulwaizya bana Efeso kuti: “Amuzisowe zyintu zyoonse eezyi, kulutila, bukali, kunyema, kubwenta alimwi amajwi aakusampaula antoomwe abubi buli boonse.” (Ef. 4:31) Kuba abube bwakukkazyika  moyo, kubomba moyo, alimwi akulilesya—izibeela zyamucelo wamuuya wa Leza—kuyakutugwasya kukkazyika moyo noliba leelyo notuli mubukkale bukatazya.—Gal. 5:22, 23.

16. Mbuti Jesu mbwaakabalulamika basikwiiya bakwe, alimwi nkaambo nzi eeci ncocakali kugambya?

¹⁶ Atulange-lange cikozyanyo ca Jesu. Amweezyeezye buyo mbwaakatyompedwe ciindi naakali abaapostolo bakwe acakulya cakumazuba camamanino. Jesu wakalizyi kuti mumawoola masyoonto buyo wakali kuyakufwa lufwu lucisa kapati. Kusalazyigwa kwazyina lya Usyi alimwi alufwutuko lwabantu boonse zyakayeeme alusyomo lwakwe. Pele aciindi cacakulya ncicona eeco, “[baapostolo] bakatalika kuzwangana kapati akati kabo kujatikizya wakali kubonwa kuti ngomupati kwiinda boonse.” Jesu taakwe naakabanyemena. Muciindi caboobo, wakabandika ambabo cakukkazyika moyo. Jesu wakabayeezya kuti bakakakatila kulinguwe nomuba muziindi zyamasukusyo. Nokuba kuti Saatani wakali kuyanda kubapupulula mbuli maila, Jesu wakajisi lusyomo lwakuti bakali kuyoozumanana kusyomeka. Mane buya wakabamba cizuminano ambabo.—Lk. 22:24-32.

17. Ncinzi ciyakubagwasya bana kukkazyika moyo?

¹⁷ Abalo bana beelede kukkazyika moyo. Kwaambisya ciindi nobasika aciimo cabukubusi, balakonzya kulimvwa kuti busolozi bwabazyali babo butondezya kuti tabajisi lusyomo mulimbabo. Nokuba kuti zimwi ziindi cilakonzya kulibonya boobo, mweelede kuzyiba kuti bazyali balacita oobo akaambo kakuti balamuyanda. Kwiinda mukubaswiilila alimwi akubelekela antoomwe ambabo, bayakumulemeka alimwi muyakuba ampuwo yakuti mulabikkila maano. Kulilemeka munzila eeyi, kulakonzya kupa kuti mube aalwaanguluko lunji mumbazu zimwi zyabuumi. Kulilesya ncitondezyo cabusongo. Kaambyo kabusongo kamwi kaamba kuti: “Mufubafuba ulaamba bukali bwakwe boonse, pele musongo ulabukasya akubutontozya.”—Tus. 29:11.

18. Muunzila nzi luyando molupa kubandika kabotu?

¹⁸ Aboobo, nomuyandwa nobazyali alimwi abana, mutatyompwi ikuti kamutabandiki kabotu mumukwasyi wanu mbuli mbomuyanda. Amuzumanane kusolekesya, alimwi akuzumanana kweenda mukasimpe. (3 Jo. 4) Munyika mpya, bantu balondokede banakuyanzana cakulondoka, kakunyina kuzwangana. Pele calino, toonse tulacita zyintu zitupa kuusa kumamanino. Aboobo, mutawayiwayi kulomba kulekelelwa. Kamulekelela kuzwa ansi amoyo. ‘Amukamantane muluyando.’ (Kol. 2:2) Luyando lulaanguzu. ‘Luyando lulakkazyika moyo alimwi luli aluzyalo. Talukalali. Talubikkilili. Lulajatila zyintu zyoonse, lulasyoma zyintu zyoonse, lulalangila zyintu zyoonse, lulaliyumya muzyintu zyoonse.’ (1 Ko. 13:4-7) Amuzumanane kuba aluyando, mpoonya muyakutalika kubandika kabotu, kuba alukkomano mumukwasyi wanu alimwi akutembaula Jehova.

[Bupanduluzi buyungizidwe]

[Mibuzyo yaciiyo]

[Cifwanikiso icili apeeji 19]

[Cifwanikiso icili apeeji 20]

Mutalekeli zyintu zimwi kumukasya kubandika mumukwasyi wanu

[Cifwanikiso icili apeeji 23]

Sena mulabaswiilila bana banu?