Kodi munasoŵapo cocita pamene mnzanu anali ndi cisoni cifukwa ca wokondedwa wake amene anamwalila? Izi zikacitika, nthawi zina timasoŵa cokamba kapena cocita, cakuti timangokhala cete. Komabe, pali zinthu zina zimene tingacite kuti tithandize olila.

Cofunika kwambili ndi kupita kunyumba ya malilo ndi kunena mau monga akuti, “Pepani ndi zimene zacitika.” M’zikhalidwe zambili, anthu amaona kuti kukumbatila munthu ndi kulila naye ndi njila yabwino yoonetsela kuti mumasamala za ena. Ngati wofeledwa akukuuzani zinazake, mvetselani bwinobwino. Koposa zonse, mungacitile banja limene lili ndi cisoni zinthu zina, makamaka zimene silingakwanitse kucita. Zinthu monga kuphika cakudya, kusamalila ana, kapena kukonza pulogalamu yamalilo ngati n’zotheka. Kugwila nchito zimenezi n’kothandiza kwambili kuposa mau olimbikitsa amene mungakambe.

M’kupita kwa nthawi, mungayambe kukamba za womwalilayo. Mwacitsanzo, mungakambe za makhalidwe ake abwino, kapena zocitika zina zosangalatsa zokhudza iye. Makambilano a conco, angathandize munthu wofeledwa kukhala wosangalala. Mwacitsanzo, Pam, amene mwamuna wake anamwalila zaka 6 zapitazo anati: “Nthawi zina, anthu amandiuza  zinthu zabwino zimene mwamuna wanga Ian anali kucita, zimene sindinali kuzidziŵa. Zimenezo zimandipangitsa kumva bwino.”

Ofufuza ena apeza kuti ofeledwa ambili amangolandila thandizo panthawi ya malilo yokha, koma m’kupita kwa nthawi amanyalanyazidwa, cifukwa anzao amakhala otangwanika ndi zocitika zina. Conco, muziyesetsa kukamba ndi wofeledwa nthawi zonse kucokela pamene wokondedwa wao anamwalila. * Ofeledwa ambili amayamikila mocokela pansi pamtima ngati mwakamba nao. Zimenezi zimacepetsa cisoni cao.

Ganizilani za Kaori, mtsikana wa Cijapanizi amene anakhumudwa kwambili amai ake atamwalila. Patapita caka ndi miyezi itatu, mkulu wake nayenso anamwalila. Koma zosangalatsa n’zakuti anzake okhulupilika anali kum’thandiza panthawi yovutayo. Mai wina wacikulile dzina lake Ritsuko, anakhala mnzake wa pamtima wa Kaori. Kaori anati: “Kukamba zoona, sindinali wokondwa ndipo sindinali kufuna aliyense kuti akhale amai anga. Koma cifukwa ca mmene a Ritsuko anali kucitila nane zinthu, ndinayamba kuwakonda kwambili. Mlungu uliwonse, tinali kupitila limodzi mu ulaliki ndi ku misonkhano yacikristu. Nthawi zambili anali kundiitana kuti tidzamwele tiyi pamodzi, kundibweletsela zakudya, ndiponso kundilembela makalata ndi makadi. Cikondi cimene a Ritsuko anandionetsa cinandilimbikitsa kwambili.”

Papita zaka 12 kucokela pamene amake Kaori anamwalila. Tsopano, iye ndi mwamuna wake ndi alaliki a nthawi zonse a Mau Mulungu. Kaori anati: “A Ritsuko amandikondabe mpaka pano. Ndikabwelela kwathu, nthawi zonse ndimapita kukawaona, ndipo amandilimbikitsa kwambili.”

Citsanzo cina ndi Poli, wa Mboni za Yehova wa m’dziko la Cyprus, amene anapindula ndi thandizo limene anali kulandila. Mwamuna wa Poli dzina lake Sozos anali m’busa wacikristu wacitsanzo cabwino komanso wokoma mtima. Iye anali kuitana ana ndi akazi amasiye kunyumba kwao kuti adzaceze nao ndi kudya nao pamodzi. (Yakobo 1:27) Zacisoni n’zakuti Sozos anapezeka ndi cotupa mu ubongo, ndipo anamwalila ali ndi zaka 53. Poli anati: “Ndinataikilidwa mwamuna wanga wokhulupilika amene ndinakhala naye m’cikwati zaka 33.”

Ataika malilo, Poli ndi mwana wake wa zaka 15 dzina lake Daniel, anasamukila ku Canada. Kumeneko, iye anapitiliza kusonkhana ndi mpingo wina wa Mboni za Yehova. Poli anati: “Mabwenzi a mumpingo watsopanowo sanali kudziŵa mavuto amene tinali kukumana nao. Ngakhale n’conco, io sanaleke kutitonthoza ndi mau ao abwino komanso kutithandiza mwakuthupi. Thandizo limenelo linali la mtengo wapatali makamaka pa nthawi imene mwana wanga anali kuyewa atate ake. Anthu amene anali kutsogolela mumpingo anali kum’konda kwambili Daniel. Mkulu wina mumpingowo, anali kuitana Daniel kuti adzaceze naye pamodzi ndi mabwenzi ena kapena kukachaya bola.” Masiku ano, Poli ndi mwana wake akusangalala.

Kukamba zoona, pali njila zambili za mmene tingatonthozele ndi kuthandizila anthu olila. Baibulo nalonso limatitonthoza mwa kutipatsa ciyembekezo cabwino kwambili ca mtsogolo.