OVANYASHA TAVA PULA

Omidjalo dange ohadi monika ngahelipi?

DANA

Omolwashike u na okulipula shi na sha naasho ho djala? Omolwaashi omidjalo ohadi holola kutya owa tya ngahelipi. Omidjalo doye ohadi yandje efano lilipi?

Omapuko atatu a kwata moiti e na sha nomidjalo nanghee to dulu oku a henuka

Epuko #1: Okweefa okunwefwa mo konghedi yokuliwapeka, oyo tai xumifwa komesho kounyuni.

Omunyasha wedina Theresa okwa ti: “Omafimbo amwe, ohandi kala nda hala oshinima shonhumba, molwaashi ashike nda mona tashi ningwa momauliko mahapu. Ngeenge omadiladilo oye okwa kala e yadi omafano ovanhu va djala oshikutu shonhumba, ohashi kala shidjuu okuhenuka okukala we shi hala.”

Oukadona havo aveke hava nwefwa mo komauliko opaipindi. Embo The Everything Guide to Raising Adolescent Boys ola ti: “Ovamati ohava nwefwa mo komidjalo odo di li momoode. Ohava nwefwa mo koinima ya tya ngaho, nokuli naashi vanini.”

Osho tashi dulu oku ku kwafela: Ombiibeli oya ti: “Omushima ta itavele ondjovo keshe, ndelenee omunamayele ta diinine eenghatu daye.” (Omayeletumbulo 14:15) Metwokumwe nefinamhango olo, diladila moule shi na sha naasho wa mona tashi ulikwa. Pashihopaenenwa, ngeenge owa mono omauliko oikutu “ya shangwa, ile ya shanwa,” “ya ponda,” ile “tai limonikila,” lipula kutya:

‘Olyelye lelalela ta ka mona ouwa, ngeenge onda shikula onghedi ya tya ngaho?’
‘Ohandi ka kala nonghedi yokukalamwenyo ya tya ngahelipi?’
‘Mbela osho otashi ka ulika ngoo oukwatya wange muwa nosho yo omufika wange?’

Omaetepo e na sha nomidjalo: Oshivike keshe, kala ho tale nawa omauliko e na sha noikutu nosho yo eedjo dimwe di na sha nomidjalo odo di li momoode. Mbela otai xumifa komesho onghedi yokukalamwenyo ya tya ngahelipi? Mbela oku na omashangelo oo tae ku ningifa u kale u udite wa pumbwa okushikula onghedi yonhumba yokudjala? Omunyasha wedina Karen okwa ti: “Oshi li efininiko linene okukala to monika nawa, ho djala nawa nosho yo ‘okuulika’ olutu loye.” Ovauliki voipindi ovo ve shi didilika ohava yandje unene elitulemo kovanyasha.”

Epuko #2: Okukala wa hala ufe ovanhu vamwe.

Omunyasha wedina Manuel okwa ti: “Ngeenge onghedi yonhumba yokudjala oi li momoode, nena keshe umwe oha djala monghedi ya tya ngaho. Ngeenge iho djala monghedi oyo, ovanhu otave ke ku yemba.” Omunyasha wedina Anna ota tu kumwe nasho. Okwa popya a ti: “Okukala wa hala ufe vamwe oku li unene efininiko ku dulife omidjalo.”

Osho tashi dulu oku ku kwafela: Ombiibeli oya ti: “Inamu hopaenena ovanhu vomounyuni ou.” (Ovaroma 12:2) Metwokumwe nomayele oo, tala nawa oikutu yoye, ndele to lipula kutya:

‘Oinima ilipi handi tale kuyo, eshi handi hoolole oikutu yange?’
‘Osha fimana shi fike peni okukala noikutu yondilo?’
‘Mbela ohandi kendabala oku li ulika kutya ohadi djala oikutu yondilo?’

Omaetepo e na sha nomidjalo: Ponhele yokutala ashike koinima ivali, osho shi li momoode (shi holike), ile sha dja momoode (shihe holike), tala koshinima oshititatu: okulineekela mwoove mwene nokukala wa amenwa. Ngeenge owa kala we lineekela filufilu mwoove mwene, ito ka kala u na oshisho shokukala wa hala ufe vamwe.

Epuko #3: Ediladilo olo kutya ‘osho shi li momoode, otashi ku monikifa nawa.’

Okakadona kedina Jennifer oka ti: “Oshoshili kutya omafimbo amwe ohashi kala eshongo okudjala oikutu itai wapalele, tashi dulika i xupi unene, ya ponda, ile tai ulike oitukulwa yolutu.”

Osho tashi dulu oku ku kwafela: Ombiibeli oya ti: “Inamu kala ashike tamu yandje elitulemo kewapalo lokombada . . . ndele yandjeni elitulemo kewapalo olo itali xulu po, ounhu womeni womomutima.” (1 Petrus 3:3, 4) Metwokumwe nomayele oo, diladila kutya shilipi sha fimana, eholokepo lokombada, ile ounhu womeni.

Omaetepo e na sha nomidjalo: Osho tashi ku kwafele u kale wa fewa, ongeenge to djala noshishohoni. Oshoshili kutya osho inashi fimana kunena. Ndele shi diladila ngaha:

Mbela owa popya nale nomunhu e hole sha lombolwa noha kala ashike ta popi kombinga yaye? Osho shi nyemateka oshosho kutya omunhu oo iha kala e shii kutya ito ka kala u hole okupwilikina kuye.

Omidjalo oda faafana neenghundafana, odo tadi dulu okuningifa ovanhu ve ku kenyanane, ngeenge oho kala ashike to popi kombinga ‘yoye mwene’

Ngeenge owa kala ho djala omuxwanaxwanena, oto kala wa fa omunhu oo. Eholokepo loye otali ka yandja etumwalaka kutya ‘tala kwaame,’ naasho otashi ku ningifa uha kale wa manguluka, wa fya ohoni, ile uhe na ko nasha. Otashi ka ningifa yo ovanhu va kale tave ku talele mefano limwe li lili, tashi dulika nokuli la puka.

Ponhele yokuninga omauliko oshinima osho ito landifa, kendabala okudjala noshishohoni. Omunyasha wedina Monica okwa ti: “Okudjala noshishohoni inashi hala okutya ou na okudjala ngaashi omukulupe. Ndele osha hala ashike okutya owe lifimaneka ove mwene nosho yo omaliudo avakweni.”