Kodi mumakumbukira tsiku limene mwana wanu anabadwa? Muyenera kuti munkayembekezera mwachidwi kubadwa kwa mwanayo. Komabe kwa makolo ena, chisangalalo chimene anali nacho chimasanduka chisoni akauzidwa kuti mwana wawo ali ndi matenda aakulu. Izi n’zimenenso zinachitika kwa Carlo ndi Mia.

Kodi inuyo muli ndi mwana wolumala ndipo mumaona kuti ndi zovuta kwambiri kumusamalira? Ngati zili choncho, musataye mtima. Pali makolo ambiri amene ali ndi ana olumala komabe amakwanitsa kuwalera bwinobwino. Tiyeni tikambirane mavuto atatu amene mwina mumakumana nawo polera mwana wolumala. Tionanso mfundo za m’Baibulo zimene zingakuthandizeni.

Makolo ambiri samvetsa akauzidwa kuti mwana wawo wapezeka ndi matenda aakulu. Mayi wina wa ku Mexico, dzina lake Juliana, anati: “Sindinakhulupirire madokotala  atatiuza kuti mwana wathu, Santiago ali ndi matenda a muubongo, amene nthawi zambiri amachititsa kuti nthiti kapena minyewa izikhala yofooka. Pa nthawi imeneyi ndinasoweratu mtengo wogwira.” Makolo ena amamva ngati mmene mayi wina wa ku Italy, dzina lake Villana, anamvera. Iye anati: “Ngakhale kuti ndinkadziwa kuti mayi akabereka ali ndi zaka zambiri, mwanayo angakhale ndi mavuto osiyanasiyana, ndinasankhabe kubereka. Panopa ndimadziimba mlandu ndikaona mmene mwana wanga amavutikira chifukwa cha matenda amene anabadwa nawo.”

Ngati nanunso mumakhala ndi maganizo ngati amenewa, dziwani kuti ndi mmene aliyense angamvere. Mulungu sanakonze zoti tizidwala. (Genesis 1:27, 28) Iye sanalenge makolo mwa njira yoti azitha kuvomereza mosavuta zinthu ngati kubereka mwana wolumala. Choncho izi zikachitika makolo zimawavuta kuvomereza. Zingatenge nthawi kuti muvomereze komanso kuti muzolowere moyo wokhala ndi mwana wolumala.

Kodi muyenera kuchita chiyani ngati nthawi zina mumadziimba mlandu chifukwa cha vuto limene mwana wanu ali nalo? Musaiwale kuti palibe amene amadziwa bwinobwino mmene zinthu monga matenda akumtundu, malo okhala komanso zinthu zina zimakhudzira mwana amene mungabereke. Nthawi zina mungayambe kuimba mlandu mwamuna kapena mkazi wanu. Koma simuyenera kuchita zimenezi. Ndi bwino kukhala ogwirizana posamalira mwana wanuyo.—Mlaliki 4:9, 10.

ZIMENE MUNGACHITE: Yesetsani kuti muwadziwe bwino matenda a mwanayo. Baibulo limati: “Nzeru zimamanga banja la munthu, ndipo kuzindikira kumachititsa kuti lilimbe kwambiri.”—Miyambo 24:3.

Madokotala odziwa za matendawo komanso mabuku osiyanasiyana angakuthandizeni kuti mudziwe zambiri zokhudza matendawo. Kuphunzira za matenda a mwana wanu kuli ngati kuphunzira chinenero chatsopano. Ngakhale kuti poyamba zingakhale zovuta, komabe m’kupita kwa nthawi mukhoza kuphunzira.

Carlo ndi Mia omwe tawatchula koyambirira kwa nkhani ino aja, anakafunsa adokotala komanso bungwe limene limadziwa bwino za matenda a mwana wawo. Iwo anati: “Zimenezi zinatithandiza kudziwa bwino matendawa komanso kudziwa zimene munthu wodwala matenda amenewa angakwanitse kuchita. Tinaona kuti pali zinthu zambiri zimene mwana wathu angathe kuchita ngati mwana aliyense. Zimenezi zinatilimbikitsa kwambiri.”

Nthawi zambiri kusamalira mwana wotere kumakhala kotopetsa kwambiri. Mayi wina wa ku New Zealand dzina lake Jenney, anati: “Mwana wanga atalumala msana, kwa zaka zingapo ndinkakhala wotopa komanso ndikamagwira ntchito zomusamalira, ndinkangolira.”

Vuto lina ndi loti mumaona kuti palibe amene mungamuuze mavuto anu. Bambo wina, dzina lake Ben, ali ndi mwana amene ali ndi matenda omwe amachititsa kuti munthu azingowonda ndipo matendawa ndi otengera kwa makolo. Iye anati: “Anthu ambiri sangamvetse mavuto amene timakumana nawo.” Mungafune kuuzako munthu wina mavuto anu. Koma mumaona kuti anzanu ambiri ali ndi ana abwinobwino. Choncho mumaona kuti ngakhale mutawafotokozera mavuto anu, sangakumvetseni.

ZIMENE MUNGACHITE: Muzipempha ena kuti akuthandizeni ndipo muzilandira thandizo limene angakupatseni. Juliana, amene tamutchula poyamba uja, ananena kuti: “Nthawi zina ine ndi mwamuna wanga timachita manyazi kuuza ena kuti atithandize.” Komabe kenako iye anati: “Koma taphunzira kuti sitingakwanitse tokha kuchita chilichonse. Anthu ena akatithandiza, timaona kuti sitili tokha.” Ngati mnzanu kapena wachibale wadzipereka kuti akhale ndi mwana wanu pamene mukucheza kapena pa misonkhano ya mpingo, yamikirani zimenezo. Mwambi wina wa m’Baibulo umati: “Bwenzi lenileni limakukonda nthawi zonse, ndipo ilo ndi m’bale amene anabadwira kuti akuthandize pakagwa mavuto.”—Miyambo 17:17.

Komanso muziyesetsa kusamalira bwino thanzi lanu. Mofanana ndi ambulansi imene imafunika kuthiridwa mafuta kuti ipitirizebe kutengera anthu kuchipatala, inunso mumafunika kusamalira thanzi lanu. Muzidya zakudya zopatsa thanzi, kuchita masewera olimbitsa thupi ndiponso kugona mokwanira kuti muzitha kusamalira bwino mwana wanu. Bambo wina dzina lake, Javier yemwe ali ndi mwana wolumala, ananena kuti: “Popeza mwana wanga satha kuyenda, ndimafunika kudya mokwanira kuti ndizikhala ndi mphamvu zomunyamula.”

Kodi mungatani kuti muzisamalira bwino thanzi lanu? Makolo ena amasinthana kusamalira mwana wawo. Zimenezi zimathandiza kuti wina akamasamalira mwanayo, winayo azipuma kapena kuchita zinthu zina. Muyenera kuyesetsa kuchepetsa kuchita zinthu zosafunikira kwenikweni ngakhale kuti kuchita zimenezi kungakhale kovuta. Koma monga mayi wina wa ku India dzina lake Mayuri ananenera, “m’kupita kwa nthawi mumazolowera.”

Fotokozerani mavuto anuwo mnzanu wapamtima. Ngakhale anzanu amene alibe ana olumala, angathe kukumvetsani komanso kukuthandizani. Komanso muzipemphera  kwa Yehova Mulungu chifukwa pemphero lingakuthandizeni kwambiri. Mayi wina, dzina lake Yazmin yemwe ali ndi ana awiri omwe ali ndi matenda a m’mapapo, ananena kuti: “Nthawi zina ndimapanikizika kwambiri moti ndimangoona ngati ndifa.” Koma iye anawonjezera kuti: “Zikatere, ndimapemphera kwa Yehova kuti andithandize ndi kundilimbikitsa ndipo ndimapezanso mphamvu.”—Salimo 145:18.

Ngati muli ndi mwana wolumala, zingakhudze kadyedwe ka banja, zosangalatsa zomwe banjalo limachita komanso nthawi imene mumathera posamalira ana ena. Zimenezi zingachititse kuti ana enawo aziona kuti sakusamalidwa kwenikweni. Kuwonjezera apo, mungamatanganidwe kwambiri ndi kusamalira mwana wodwalayo moti banja lanu lingayambe kusayenda bwino. Bambo wina wa ku Liberia, dzina lake Lionel, ananena kuti: “Nthawi zina mkazi wanga amandinena kuti sindimuthandiza kusamalira mwana wathu. Ndimaona ngati sakundilemekeza ndipo nthawi zina ndimamukwiyira.”

ZIMENE MUNGACHITE: Kuti ana anu onse azidziwa kuti mumawakonda, muzikonza zosangalatsa zomwe ana onsewo angasangalale nazo. Jenney amene tamutchula uja ananena kuti: “Nthawi zina timapita kukudya ku lesitanti inayake, imene mwana wathu wamkulu amakonda.”

Muziyesetsa kupeza nthawi yolankhulana komanso kupemphera ndi mkazi kapena mwamuna wanu chifukwa zimenezi zingalimbitse ukwati wanu. Bambo wina wa ku India, dzina lake Aseem, yemwe mwana wake ali ndi matenda okomoka, ananena kuti: “Ngakhale kuti nthawi zina ine ndi mkazi wanga timatopa kwambiri komanso kukhumudwa, timayesetsa kupeza nthawi youzana nkhawa zathu komanso kupempherera limodzi. M’mawa uliwonse ana athu asanadzuke, timakambirana lemba la m’Baibulo.” Mabanja ena amakonda kukambirana nkhani ngati zimenezi asanakagone. Kukambirana kotereku komanso kupemphera limodzi kumathandiza kuti ukwati ukhale wolimba ngakhale pa nthawi ya mavuto. (Miyambo 15:22) Mwamuna wina ndi mkazi wake anati: “Nthawi imene sitiiwala pa moyo wathu ndi imene tinakumana ndi mavuto n’kuthana nawo limodzi.”

Baibulo limalonjeza kuti posachedwapa Mulungu adzachotsa matenda onse. (Chivumbulutso 21:3, 4) Pa nthawi imeneyo, “palibe munthu wokhala m’dzikolo amene adzanene kuti: ‘Ndikudwala.’” *—Yesaya 33:24.

Mfundo zomwe takambirana m’nkhani ino zingakuthandizeni kuti mukwanitse kulera bwino mwana wanu wolumala ngakhale kuti mukukumana ndi mavuto osiyanasiyana. Carlo ndi Mia, amene mawu awo ali koyamba kwa nkhani ino aja ananena kuti: “Musamakhumudwe ngati mutaona kuti zinthu sizikuyenda mmene mumaganizira. Muziganizira kwambiri zinthu zabwino zimene mwana wanuyo amakwanitsa kuchita chifukwa pali zambiri zomwe angathe kuchita.”