Meeting the Challenge of Adjusting to a New Congregation
HAVE you ever moved to a new congregation? If so, you probably agree with Jean-Charles, who says: “It is a challenge to adapt to a new congregation while maintaining the spiritual balance of everyone in the family.” In addition to finding work, accommodations, and perhaps new schools, those who move may face the challenges of a harsher climate, a different culture, and a new witnessing territory.
Nicolas and Céline faced a different challenge. They accepted an assignment from the France branch to move to a new congregation. They relate: “The period following the initial excitement was difficult because we missed our friends. We did not yet have a sufficiently strong relationship with the brothers in our new congregation.” a In view of the challenges, how can you make a success of moving to a new congregation? What can others do to help? And what spiritual blessings might you receive and impart in your new congregation?
FOUR PRINCIPLES TO HELP YOU MEET THE CHALLENGE
1. Rely on Jehovah. (Ps. 37:5) Kazumi, in Japan, left the congregation she had been a part of for 20 years when her husband received a job transfer. How did she “commit [her] way to Jehovah”? She says: “I poured out my heart to Jehovah about all the panic, loneliness, and anxiety I felt. Each time I did so, he gave me the strength I needed.”
How can you increase your reliance on Jehovah? Just as a plant needs water and nutrients from the soil in order to grow, so our faith must be nourished in order to grow. Nicolas, previously mentioned, found that meditating on the examples of Abraham, Jesus, and Paul—men who made many sacrifices to do God’s will—strengthened his confidence in Jehovah’s support. A regular program of personal Bible study will not only help you to cope with any changes in your life but also equip you with spiritual gifts that you can share with others in your new congregation.
2. Avoid making comparisons. (Eccl. 7:10) Jules encountered a wide culture gap when he moved from Benin to the United States. “I had the impression that I had to relate my life story to each new person I met,” he recalls. Because this was different from what he was used to, he started isolating himself from the congregation. After getting to know the brothers and sisters better, however, he changed his viewpoint. He says: “I believe that wherever we are on the earth, humans are the same. They just express themselves differently. Accepting people as they are is essential.” So avoid making comparisons with your former congregation. As one pioneer sister, Anne-Lise, put it: “I did not move to find what I had left behind. I moved in order to discover new things.”
Elders too need to avoid making comparisons with their former congregation. Different methods are not necessarily wrong. It is wise to get to know the local circumstances before making suggestions. (Eccl. 3:1, 7b) It is better to lead by example than to impose one’s own ideas on a congregation.—2 Cor. 1:24.
3. Get involved. (Phil. 1:27) Moving requires a lot of time and energy, but it is vital to attend congregation meetings—in person if possible—right from the start. After all, if those in your new congregation never see you or rarely do, how can they support you? Lucinda, who moved with her two daughters to a large city in South Africa, recalls: “I was advised to focus on getting deeply involved with the congregation, working with others in the ministry, and participating at the meetings. We also offered our home to be used for meetings for field service.”
“Striving side by side” in theocratic activities with the brothers and sisters in your new congregation is a fine way to contribute to “the faith of the good news.” Anne-Lise, mentioned earlier, was encouraged by her elders to try to preach with everyone. The result? “I quickly realized that this is a key to fitting in,” she says. Also, volunteering for such activities as cleaning and maintaining the Kingdom Hall will indicate that you now consider this to be your congregation. The more you get involved, the sooner you will be accepted and feel a part of your new spiritual family.
4. Develop new friendships. (2 Cor. 6:11-13) Showing personal interest is the best way to make friends, so allow ample time before and after meetings to approach others and get to know them. Make a conscious effort to learn their names. Remembering people’s names and being warm and approachable will attract others to you and no doubt lead to precious new friendships.
Rather than worry about being accepted, allow your new brothers and sisters to get to know you as you really are. Do as Lucinda relates, “We have close friendships now because of taking the initiative to invite others to our home.”
“WELCOME ONE ANOTHER”
Entering a Kingdom Hall full of strangers may be daunting for some. So how can you make it easier for the new arrivals? “Welcome one another,” encouraged the apostle Paul, “just as the Christ also welcomed you.” (Rom. 15:7) By imitating Christ, elders can help new ones to feel welcome. (See the box “ What Contributes to a Successful Move.”) However, all in the congregation, including children, have a part to play in making new friends.
Welcoming others includes showing hospitality but may also involve offering practical help. One sister, for example, gave of her precious time to show a new arrival around town and to explain the public transportation system. The sister’s gesture really touched the new one and helped her to adapt.
AN OPPORTUNITY TO GROW
As a locust matures, it sheds its skin several times before its wings are capable of flying. Similarly, when moving to a new congregation, you need to shed any apprehension that prevents you from spreading your wings in Jehovah’s service. “Moving is excellent training,” confirm Nicolas and Céline. “Adapting to new people and different surroundings encouraged us to cultivate new qualities.” Jean-Charles, quoted at the outset, comments on how his family has benefited: “The change has allowed our children to blossom in the new congregation. After just a few months, our daughter accepted assignments in the midweek meeting and our son became an unbaptized publisher.”
What if your circumstances prevent you from moving, for example, to where the need is greater? Then why not make a fresh start where you are and try to apply some of the above suggestions? While relying on Jehovah, fully involve yourself in congregation activities by making arrangements to work with others in the ministry and developing new friendships or strengthening existing ones. Could you reach out to new or needy ones, providing some kind of practical help? Since love characterizes true Christians, doing so will no doubt contribute to your spiritual growth. (John 13:35) You can be assured that “God is well-pleased with such sacrifices.”—Heb. 13:16.
Despite the challenges, many Christians have made a success of moving to a new congregation—and so can you! “Changing congregations helped me to widen out,” says Anne-Lise. Kazumi is now convinced that by moving “you can experience Jehovah’s support in ways you haven’t before.” And what about Jules? He says: “The friendships I have made help me not to feel out of place anymore. I now feel such a part of my new congregation that I would find it hard to leave.”
a For advice on “Coping With Homesickness in God’s Service,” see the article with that title in the May 15, 1994, issue of The Watchtower.