Busana Naki Thukayithagha Eribya n’Amaha?

KANDI ibbwa byangabere bithi, Daniel omulhwana oyuwabya alhwere ekansa oyothulyanayako okw’itsuka ly’omwatsi w’ahanyuma kwa lholha embere iniane n’amaha wiwe awaghumire? Mbwino angana lhamire ekansa? Mbwino angabere iniakineho namunabwire? Nibya n’abakasighika kutsibu amalengekania aw’eribugha indi amaha akawathikaya kutsibu nabu sibang’ikirirya ekyo. Kandi eyi ni nzumwa ngulhu ey’eryibuka. Sithutholere thukalengekania thuthi eribya n’amaha ikikendi lhamya obulhwere bwosi-bwosi, kutse erighunzaho ebitsibu ebyosi eby’awithe.

Dokita Nathan Cherney abere akakanirya okwa kinimba ky’amakuru ekikahulhawamo CBS mwakunga okwa kabi ak’erilhabirirania omw’ibwira abalhwere wuthi eribya n’amaha kikaghunza. Mwabugha athi, “Thukanabana abalhume abakatsweba bakali babu bathi sibali ghaniraya kutsibu, kandi bathi sibathalengaho erilengekania kutsibu okwa bindu ebikahimba.” Dokita Cherney mwongerako athi: “Eribya n’amalengekania ng’aya kyabirileka abandu ibasa mw’amalengekania bathi omundu amathendi lhama lhuba ikyanganabya indi syathakolha ekikaghunza erithoka erikakirya obulhwere bulebe, kandi ekindu ng’ekyo ikikendibya ini kindu kibi.”

Omo kwenene, abakarwanisaya obulhwere obuthelhama bali omo malhwa awakalire, awakayithagha akaghalha kanene. Neryo ab’okw’ibo eryongera abalhwere ng’abo b’obulhumi bunene omw’ileka bayowe nabi omwa muthima ikikendibya isi kindu ky’olhwanzo. Neryo ibbwa, mbwino thubughe thuthi eribya n’amaha sikiwithe mughaso wosi-wosi?

Kwabithe bithya. Ng’eky’erileberyako, omudokita iyan’oyo akabya akakolha okwa balhwere, syalisubulira okw’ithambira lisa kutse erilhangira athi abandu bakabya ibane n’engebe, aliwe kandi akalhangira athi omulhwere akayowa ndeke ngoku kyanga thokekana omughulhu akine n’engebe. Abadokita ng’abo bikirirye kutsibu emithambirire eyikawathikaya omundu eriyowa ndeke, nomwangabya iniathohire. Ni bingyi ebikakanganaya ngoku eribya n’amaha kikaleka ekyo ikyabya​—nibya na kwilhaba aho.

Omughaso w’Eribya n’Amaha

Dokita W. Gifford-Jones oyukakanaya okwa by’emithambirire okwa makuru, akabugha athi: “Amaha ni bubalya obukawathikaya kutsibu.” Mwalebya ndeke erisekulya muthina-muthina eryakolhawa erilebya omughaso ow’erighetha-ghetha abalhwere obulhwere obukalire. Kikalengekanibawa indi obuwathikya obuli ng’obu bukaleka abandu ibabya ibane n’amaha n’amalengekania awatholere. Erisekulya lighuma eryakolhawa omwa 1989 mulyakangania lithi abalhwere ababana obuwathikya ng’obo mubaghunza buthuku buuli, aliwe erisekulya eryakolhawa lino-lino siriri lyakakasya ndeke oko mwatsi oyo. Nomwabine, erisekulya lyabirikangania ngoku abalhwere abakaghetha-ghethawa bakabya n’ebitunturo n’obulhumi buke bamalinganisibwa n’abathaghetha-ghethawa.

Thulebaye erindi sekulya eryakolhawa erilebya eribya n’amaha kutse erithendibya nagho nga kikahamba kithi oko mundu oyulhwere obulhwere bw’omuthima (CHD). Egurupu y’abalhume abalhabire okwa 1,300 mubasekulibwako ndeke erilebya nga banawithe amaha kutse eyihi. Habere habirilhaba emyaka 10, abalhabire okwa 12 okwa 100 omwa balhume abo babya ibabirilhwalha obulhwere bulebe obw’omuthima obw’omulingo owe CHD. Okw’ibo, abathabya bawithe amaha bababya bangyi hakuhi mirundi ibiri kwilhaba ababya n’amaha. Profesa omuwathikya omwa by’amaghalha n’emibere y’abandu, ya Laura Kubzansky ow’okwa sukuru eya Harvard School of Public Health, akabugha athi: “Obwema bungyi obukakanganaya ngoku eribya ‘n’amalengekania awatholere’ kikaghasira amaghalha w’omundu bukalethawa n’obuli mundu ahabwiwe, aliwe erisekulya eri lyabirighumya ngoku hane erihambangana ahakathi-kathi k’amalengekania agho mundu akabya nagho n’esyondwalha sy’omuthima.”

Erindi sekulya lyabirikangania ngoku abakalengekanaya bathi amaghalha wabu syali ndeke erithwalira haghuma sibali lhama lhuba bamasemezibwa bamalinganisibwa n’abo abakalengekanaya bathi amaghalha wabu syali nabi. Nibya n’eribyaho buthuku buuli kyabirihambanibwa n’eribya n’amaha. Erisekulya lighuma mulyakangania abakulire omo myaka nga bakahambawako bathi busana amalengekania awatholere kutse awathatholere agho bawithe awahambire okw’ikekelhuha. Abakulire omo myaka babere bakabwirwa ngoku omundu akabya akaghenda akakulha kikaleka iniabya n’amenge manene n’eribya iniamabiriminya bingyi, mubatsuka erilyatha ng’abawithe amani manene n’akaghalha. Erithwalira haghuma, embinduka eyabyaho eyuwene eyi iyingene-ngene n’akaghalha akabangabana bamakolha ebisasaizi ahabw’esyoyenga 12!

Busana naki eribya n’amaha n’eribya n’amalengekania awatholere ibyabya ng’ebikawathikaya amaghalha? Obundi abanya sayansi n’abadokita bangabya isibali bathayitheghererya ndeke obwongo bw’omundu n’omubiri erithoka eriha eby’erisubirya ebihikire. Nomwabine, abakasekulhaya oko mwatsi oyu babiribumbura ebindu eby’omughaso. Ng’eky’erileberyako, profesa mughuma oyusomire esyondwalha esikahamba obwongo mwabugha athi: “Omundu akayowa ndeke amabya inianatsemire kandi inianawithe amaha. Eribya iwunatsemire kikaleka iwuthabya n’amaghaniryo mangyi, kandi n’omubiri wawu iniabya iniane ndeke. Ni kindi kindu ekya bandu bangana kolha ibo erithoka eribya ibane n’amaghalha awuwene.”

Obundi abandi badokita, n’abasomire emibere y’abandu, n’abanya-sayansi bangana lhangira amalengekania aya nga ni mahyaka, aliwe okwa bigha be Biblia, eki si kihyaka. Emyaka nga 3,000 enyuma, Omwami Solomona ow’amenge mwasondolibwa erihandika okw’eki athi: “Omuthima w’eritsema ni busaki [bubalya] buwene; nikwa ekirimu ekibbunikire kikumaya amakuha.” (Emisyo 17:22) Ebinywe ebiri omwa mulhondo oyu sibighemere okwa lhuhandi lhughuma. Syalibugha athi omuthima owatsemire akalhamaya obulhwere bwosi-bwosi, aliwe akakwama kya bugha athi ‘ni bubalya buwene.’

Kyamabya indi amaha ni mubatsi, neryo ithwangana yibulya, ni dokita wahi oyuthe wanga handikiragho omundu? N’ekindi, eribya n’amaha sikirisubulira okw’ithabya n’amaghalha awuwene lisa.

Ngoku Eribya n’Amaha, n’Erithendibya n’Amaha Bikahamba Okwa Ngebe Yawu

Abakasekulhaya babirilhangira ngoku abawithe amaha bakaghasirawa omo nzira nyingyi busana n’eribya n’amalengekania awatholere. Bakakolha ndeke okwa sukuru, okwa mubiiri, kandi nibya n’omwa by’amasatha. Ng’eky’erileberyako, hane erisekulya eryakolhawa okwa timu y’abakali abathibithi. Abathendeki mubaha amalengekania wabu erikwamana n’ebya balhangira ebihambire okwa maaka w’abakali omwa by’amathibitho. N’abakali abo nabu mubabulibwa kandi n’olhulengo lhw’amaha wabu lhwamalebibwa ndeke. Ebyalhwiririramu mubyakangania ngoku olhulengo lhw’amaha olhwa bakali abo babya nalho lhw’olhwaleka ibathoka ndeke amathibitho kwilhaba amaaka agho babya bawithe ngoku abathendeki babu balhangira. Busana naki amaha akahamba athya kutsibu okwa ngebe yethu?

Hali bingyi ebyabiriminywa busana n’erisekulya okwa ky’erithendibya n’amaha. Omo myaka eya 1960, erisekulya mulyakangania ekindu ekikaswekaya okwa mibere y’ebisoro, ekindu ekyaleka abakasekulhaya ibathunga ebinywe bino “erigha eriyowa nga sihali ekya wanga thoka.” Mubakiminya ngoku abandu nabo banganabya n’ekitsibu ng’eki. Ng’eky’erileberyako, erisekulya mulyakolhwa omw’ihira abandu omwa mwanya mulebe omuli etoko nene kutsibu n’eribabwira bathi b’ighe erihunia etoko eyo omw’ihimatha amapesa muthina-muthina. Mubathoka erihunia etoko eyo.

Egurupu eyakabiri muyabwirwa erikolha ekindu ikyanekyo, aliriryo lino amapesa mwathahunia etoko. Nawu ngoku wangana kilhangira, abangyi omwa gurupu eyakabiri eyi mubatsuka eriyowa nga sihakiri ekya banga thoka. Enyuma waho, okwa kiro ikyanekyo, mubathasyabwirwa erikolha ekya balyakolha, aliwe mubaghana erithasyalengesya. Babya ibabirighunzerera bathi sihali ekya banga thasyakolha erihunia etoko. Aliwe, n’abandi ababya omwa gurupu eyakabiri eyi, ababya bawithe amaha mubathalighira amalengekania aw’eriyowa nga sihali ekya banga thoka.

Dokita Martin Seligman, omughuma w’okwa bakolha erisekulya eri, mwathwamu erilholha embere erisekulya okwa bikalhwiririra omw’ibya n’amaha n’erithendibya n’amaha. Mwasekulya buuli okwa malengekania w’abandu abakayilhangira nga sihali ekya bangathoka. Mwakiminya ngoku amalengekania aw’erithendibya n’amaha aya akalemesaya abandu omwa bingyi ebya bakalengaho erikolha omwa ngebe. Seligman mwaghunzerera na bino okwa malengekania aw’erithendibya n’amaha n’ebikalhwiririramu: “Erisekulya erya namabirikolha ahabw’emyaka 25 lyamabirileka ingakiminya ngoku thwamabera erilengekania thuthi ebindu bibi bikendi thubyako kutse thuthi sibyendi syahwaho, kikahamba nabi okwa byosi thukakolha, kandi mughulhu mungyi ebindu ebyo bikathuhikako.”

Kandi, abandi munabwire bangana lhangira erighunzerera eri ng’erihyaka, aliwe si kihyaka okwa bigha be Biblia. Thahulikirira ekyo musyo ono akabugha: “Wamahwa amani omwa buthuku bw’ebitsibu, amaaka wawu iniakendi keha.” (Emisyo 24:10, NWT) Aho, e Biblia yikakanganaya ndeke-ndeke ngoku erihwa amani, erithendibya n’amaha, ikikendi leka omundu iniahwa akaghalha ak’erikolha ekindu kyosi-kyosi. Aliwe ibbwa ni kyahi ekya wanga kolha erirwanisya erithendibya n’amaha nuku wongere eribya iwune n’amaha?

[Ekisasani]

Eribya n’amaha kyangana wathikya kutsibu