• “I was feeling like my husband been cheating on me over and over.”

• “It make me to feel small. I was feeling that I was not fine again in my husband eye and I was not having value.”

• “I was not able to tell anyone about it and it was really suffering me.”

• “I was feeling that Jehovah not care for me.”

The thing them this people saying just show how the wife can really suffer when the husband look at pornography. a And if he been hiding himself doing it, maybe for some months or years, maybe it will make her to not trust him again. One wife say, “I feel that I not really know my husband. Maybe he hiding other thing them from me.”

We made this article for the wife who her husband looking at pornography. b It will talk about Bible principles that can comfort her and remind her that Jehovah love her and he want help her. It will also help her to get more peace and remain close to Jehovah. c

Even though you can’t control everything your husband can do, but you can do some thing them that can help you to be happy. Let see some of them.

Don’t blame yourself. Alice d was feeling that she was not really fine in her husband eye. She was thinking, ‘Why my husband like looking at other women instead of me?’ Some wife them can blame their self for getting vex because they can be thinking that they making the situation worse. Danielle say, “I use to get vex bad way. And I was feeling that my vexation was spoiling our marriage.”

 If you feeling the same way, know that Jehovah not blaming you for the thing them your husband can do. James 1:14 say: “Each one is tried by being drawn out and enticed by his own desire.” (Rom. 14:12; Phil. 2:12) Instead of Jehovah blaming you, He value your loyalty to him.​—2 Chron. 16:9.

Maybe sometime the wife can feel that the reason her husband looking at pornography that because she not really fine in his eye again. People who really know about this topic say that looking at pornography can make people to get strong sexual feeling that no woman can satisfy.

Try to not worry too much. Catherine say it really use to worry her about her husband looking at pornography. Frances say: “When I can’t see my husband around, I can start worrying.” Some wife them say they can feel shame when they around other brother and sister them that know about their husband problem. But still some of them can feel that they on their own because nobody understand what they going through.

It normal to get this type of feeling. But if you continue thinking on this thing them, it will make you to worry more. Try to focus on your friendship with Jehovah. When you do it, it will help you to bear it.​—Ps. 62:2; Eph. 6:10.

Maybe you can read and think on some Bible story about women them who were really feeling bad but started feeling better when they pray to Jehovah. Sometime he not use to stop the problem they were going through, but he use to help them to not worry too much. For example, Hannah was really feeling bad because of the problem she was going through. But after she “prayed for a long time before Jehovah,” her heart come down and she was not worrying again. Even though she never knew what was coming happen in the future.​—1 Sam. 1:​10, 12, 18; 2 Cor. 1:​3, 4.

Ask the elder them for help. They can be “a shelter from the wind, a refuge from the rainstorm.” (Isa. 32:​2, ftns.) They can even find one sister who you can talk to and who can comfort you.​—Prov. 17:17.

You think you can help your husband overcome this bad habit? Maybe. The Bible show  that when you get powerful enemy to fight, “two are better than one.” (Eccl. 4:​9-12) Book people na found out that when marry people work together, most of the time the husband can be able to overcome his bad habit, and his wife can be able to trust him again.

But your husband will only be able to leave this habit if he really willing to work hard to stop it. He na beg Jehovah for strength and he na go to the elder them for help? (2 Cor. 4:7; Jas. 5:​14, 15) He na put things in place that will help him to not look at pornography? For example, he really careful about the way he can use his phone or tablet? And he can stay away from anything that can tempt him? (Prov. 27:12) He willing for you to help him and really be honest with you? If the answer that yes, then it possible for you to help him.

How? Let look at one example. Felicia marry Ethan, who was already in the habit of looking at pornography from the time he was small. Felicia make it easy for him to talk to her when he feel like looking at pornography. Ethan say: “I tell my wife everything. She help me to avoid temptation and she can always ask me how I doing. And she help me to not go on the internet fast-fast.” Felicia can feel bad because Ethan like looking at pornography. She say, “But my bad feelings and vexation can’t help him to keep avoiding this bad habit. After we talk about his problem together, he too can be ready to help me with my problem too.”

When marry people talk about this topic like this, it can help the husband to avoid looking at pornography. Also, it can help the wife to start trusting him again. When the husband willing to tell his wife about how he feeling, what he doing, and where he going, then it will be easy for his wife to trust him. Because he not hiding anything from her.

You believe you can help your husband the same way? Then maybe yor can discuss this article together. His goals will be to stop looking at pornography and to give you reason to trust him again. He must not get vex because you want talk about this problem but he must try to understand how this problem making you to feel. Your goals that to continue to encourage him to work on his problem and give him the chance to prove that you can trust him again. Two of yor must learn wetin can make people to look at pornography and how people can stop this bad habit. e

When you scare that you and your partner will make palaver when you talking about it, then you can ask one elder that two of yor  free with to be there. Know that even after your partner stop this bad habit, it can take long time before you will be able to trust him again. Don’t give up. Look for small-small things that show that your relationship improving. You must get hope that when you allow time to pass and you hold your heart, small-small your marriage will get strong again.​—Eccl. 7:8; 1 Cor. 13:4.

If your husband look at pornography again, you think it mean he not repentant or he will never stop this bad habit? No. Especially if this bad habit part of him, it will take long time or maybe his whole life to leave it. It possible for him to watch pornography again even after he stop this bad habit for long time. To stop it from happening, he must continue to take strong action. Maybe by continuing to be strict with himself even if it look like he na stop this bad habit. (Prov. 28:14; Matt. 5:29; 1 Cor. 10:12) He need to get the new “dominant mental attitude” and learn to “hate thing them that bad.” This bad thing them include looking at pornography or any other thing that not clean like playing with your private parts. (Eph. 4:23; Ps. 97:10; Rom. 12:9) You think he willing to do this thing them? If the answer that yes, maybe he will be able to stop this bad habit. f

What if your partner not want stop this bad habit? Maybe most of the time you will get vex or feel that he let you down. Or maybe you will feel that he betray you. And it normal to feel like that. You can get peace of mind when you leave matter in Jehovah hands. (1 Pet. 5:7) Continue to get close to Jehovah by studying, praying, and thinking good-good on what you study. When you do it, you can be sure that Jehovah will get more close to you. Isaiah 57:15 say, Jehovah resides with those who feeling “crushed and lowly,” helping them to be happy again. Do your best to be faithful to Jehovah. Ask the elder them to help you. And keep hoping that one day in the future your husband will change.​—Rom. 2:4; 2 Pet. 3:9.