1-2. (a) Wetin single Christians must think about good-good before they start dating? (b)  What “dating” mean? (See “Meaning for Some Words.”)

 YOU want get marry? Even though happiness not depend on marriage, plenty single Christians, whether young or old, want get marry. But before you start dating, you must get strong relationship with Jehovah, know yourself good-good, and be able to take care of your family needs. a (1 Cor. 7:36) When you prepare like that, it possible that your marriage will be happy.

² But it can’t always be easy to find good marriage mate. (Prov. 31:10) And even if you find someone who you really want know good-good, maybe it will not still be easy to start dating. b In this article, we will talk about what can help single Christians to find somebody who they think will be good marriage mate for them and start dating. We will also learn how other people in the congregation can support those who want get marry.

WHAT CAN HELP YOU TO FIND GOOD MARRIAGE MATE?

3. What some things single Christian must think about when they looking for marriage mate?

³ If you want get marry, it will be good for you to know the quality them you want see in your mate before you  start dating. Or else, you will overlook someone who will be good marriage mate for you, or you will start dating somebody who not good for you. That true, anybody you thinking about marrying must be baptize Christian. (1 Cor. 7:39) But that not every baptize Christian will be good marriage mate for you. So, ask yourself: ‘What my goals in life? What important quality them I want see in my marriage mate? I reasonable with the quality them I want see in my mate?’

4. Wetin some people na pray about?

⁴ For sure, you na pray to Jehovah to help you find the person you really want. (Phil. 4:6) That true, Jehovah not promise anybody that he will find marriage mate for them. But he care about your feelings and what you need, and he able to help you when you trying to find marriage mate. So continue praying to Jehovah about how you feeling and what you want. (Ps. 62:8) Pray for patience and wisdom. (Jas. 1:5) One single brother name John, c from America say, when I praying: “I can tell Jehovah the quality them I really want in the person I want marry. And I can pray for opportunities to meet somebody like that. I can also ask Jehovah to help me develop qualities that will make me to be good husband.” One sister name Tanya, from Sri Lanka, say: “While I looking for someone to marry, I ask Jehovah to help me to remain faithful and happy.” Even if it taking long time to find somebody you will get marry to, Jehovah promise to continue to take care of you and give you the love and attention that you need. —Ps. 55:22.

5. What opportunities single Christians get to meet someone who love Jehovah? (1 Corinthians 15:58) (Also see the picture.)

 ⁵ The Bible encourage us to have “plenty to do in the work of the Lord.” (Read 1 Corinthians 15:58.) If you continue to be busy in Jehovah service and spend time with different-different brothers and sisters, you will enjoy good association. And you will also get opportunities to meet other single people, who focus on serving Jehovah just like you. And when you do your best to make Jehovah happy, you will enjoy real happiness.

6. Wetin single people must remember when they looking for somebody to marry?

⁶ But be careful. Don’t allow finding somebody to marry to be the most important thing in your life. (Phil. 1: 10) Real happiness not depend on whether you marry or single. It depend on your friendship with Jehovah. (Matt. 5:3) And the time you still single, maybe you will get more freedom to do more in your ministry. (1 Cor. 7: 32, 33) Use this time the best way. One sister name Jessica from America, who got marry when she was almost 40 years, say, “I stay busy in the ministry, and it help me to be satisfy even though I wanted to get marry.”

TAKE TIME TO OBSERVE OR LOOK AT THE PERSON

7. Before you tell someone that you interested in them, why it will be good to look at the person for some time? (Proverbs 13:16)

⁷ But what if you see somebody and you think they will be good for you? You must just tell the person how you feel about them right away? The Bible say wise person can know about something first before they act. (Read Proverbs 13:16.) So it will be wise for you to keep it to yourself and look at the person for some time before telling them how you feel about them. One brother name Aschwin from the Netherlands say: “It quick to develop feelings but it also quick for the feelings to disappear. So when you give yourself time to know the person, you will not just rush and start dating base on how you feel.” Beside that one, when you take your time to know the person, maybe you will find out that they will not be good for you.

8. How somebody who single can take time to know the person they want marry? (Also see the picture.)

⁸ How you can take your time to know the other person? You can do it to the meetings or when yor go for get-together. Maybe during that time, you will get to know the person behavior and whether they spiritual. Who them he friendly with? Wetin he like talking about? (Luke 6:45) Yor get the same goals? You can ask the elders in his congregation or other mature Christians who know him good-good. (Prov. 20:18) You can also find out about whether he get good name and the quality them he get. (Ruth 2:11) When you observing the person, be careful to not embarrass them. Respect the person feelings. And don’t try to be around them every time and want know everything about them.

9. Before telling somebody that you get interest in them, wetin you must be convince about?

⁹ How long you must look at the person before you tell them you get interest in them? If you tell the person too soon, it could make the person to feel that you can’t think good-good before making decision. (Prov. 29:20) But if you take too long, then the person could think that  you not too sure about what you want, especially if the person know you get interest in them. (Eccl. 11:4) Remember, you not need to be convince that you will marry the person before you can tell them that you get interest in them. But you must be convince that you ready to marry, and that the other person can be good marriage mate for you.

10. What you must do if you notice that somebody get interest in you but you not get interest in the person?

¹⁰ What if you get to know that somebody get interest in you? If you not get interest in the person, try to make it clear by the way you treat the person. It will not be good for you to make the person think that you want date them, when you know you not get interest in them.—1 Cor. 10:24; Eph. 4:25.

11. If they ask you to arrange dating or marriage, wetin you must really think about?

¹¹ In some countries, sometime people can expect the parents or other older people to choose marriage mate for their single relatives. In other countries, that the family or friends can find the marriage mate and arrange for the two people to meet, and see whether they want start dating. If they ask you to arrange dating or marriage for somebody, think about what the man and the woman like and need. If you find someone that you think will be good for your friend or relative, try to know the person good-good. Try to know the quality them the person get, and most important, whether they get close friendship with Jehovah. Close friendship with Jehovah more important than money, education, position, or family background. Remember, that the single brother and the single sister must make the final decision about whether they will get marry.—Gal. 6:5.

HOW YOU CAN START DATING?

12. How you can tell somebody that you want date them?

¹² If you want date somebody, how you must tell them? d You can arrange to tell  them in public place or on the phone. Make it clear to the person that you want date them. (1 Cor. 14:9) And if the person say they want think about it, give them time. (Prov. 15:28) If the person say they not get interest, respect their feelings.

13. What you must do if somebody say they want date you? (Colossians 4:6)

¹³ Suppose somebody say they get interest in you? Maybe it was not easy for them to tell you. So be kind and show them respect. (Read Colossians 4:6.) If you will need time to think about it, tell them. But you must try to answer the person soon. (Prov. 13:12) If you not get interest in the person, you must make it clear to them, but be kind. See how one brother name Hans, from Austria, answer one sister who was having interest in him: “I made my decision clear to her, but I do it with respect. I not waste time to do it, because I never wanted her to think that I will change my mind. For that same reason, I was also careful with what I say or do when I around her.” But if you get interest in dating the person, tell them. And yor discuss what yor will expect to happen when yor dating. Depending on the culture and other situations, maybe what you expect will be different from the other person.

HOW OTHER PEOPLE CAN SUPPORT SINGLE CHRISTIANS?

14. How we can support single Christians by the things we say?

¹⁴ How all of us can support single Christians who want get marry? One way that to be careful about what we say. (Eph. 4:29) Ask yourself: ‘I can tease people who want get marry? When I see single brother and single sister talking, I can just conclude that they dating?’ (1 Tim. 5:13) Also, we must never make single Christians to feel that something wrong with them just because they not marry. Hans, who we talk about before, say: “Some brothers and sisters say, ‘Why you not want get marry? You not small again.’ Saying things like that can make single people to feel that we not value them. And it can put more pressure on them to want get marry.” It will be better for us to look for opportunities to tell single Christians thank you!—1 Thess. 5:11.

15. (a) According to Romans 15:​2, wetin we must think about before helping somebody to find marriage mate? (Also see the picture.) (b) What important lessons you learn from the video? (Also see the footnote.)

 ¹⁵ Suppose we think that certain brother and certain sister will be good together when they marry? The Bible tell us to think about other people feelings. (Read Romans 15:2.) Plenty single people not like for other people to find marriage mate for them, and we must respect their decision. (2 Thess. 3:11) For other people, they will want for us to help them. But they must ask us first before we do it. e (Prov. 3:27) And some single people just like for you to create the opportunity for them. One single sister name Lydia from Germany say: “You can invite some brothers and sisters together and include the two people. Just create the opportunity for the brother and sister to meet and let them decide what they want do.”

16. Wetin single Christians must remember?

¹⁶ Whether we single or marry, all of us can be happy and satisfy in life! (Ps. 128:1) So if you want marry but you not find somebody yet, continue focusing on your service to Jehovah. One sister name Sin Yi from Macao, say: “The time you single for now will be short when you compare it with the time you will spend in Paradise with your marriage mate. Enjoy your singleness now and make good use out of it.” But what if you see somebody now that you think you can marry and yor na already start dating? In the next article, we will talk about how you can make good decision when you dating.