Makumbi ano kuli jishinga namakina amavulu aze anakutukafwa kuhanjika navatu vali kwakusuku, kuhambakana muze chapwile kunyima. Chipwe ngocho echi kacheshi nakuzamisa chikuma usepa wavatuko. Mukweze umwe walunga ambile ngwenyi: “Ngunamono nge usepa wami navakwetu unakuzeya. Oloze tata hanga achili lika namasepa jenyi vakumwaka.”

Mwomwo ika chinakupwila chachikalu vatu makumbi ano kupwa nausepa wakukola?

Kuwaha nakupihya chajishinga namakina eka. Kulihanjikisa, nakulitumina mijimbu chinakulingisa vatu vamone ngwavo vanakuzamisa usepa wavo navatu vali kwakusuku. Vatu vavavulu jino vali nakulisonekela tumazu twatundende chipwe kuhanjika mukavatu, muchishishisa chakushimutwila kanawa. Mukanda waArtificial Maturity wamba ngwawo, “Makumbi ano vatu vavavulu kaveshi nakutwama hamwe nakushimutwila namasepa javoko. Vaka-shikola vali nakushimutwilanga namasepa javo hajishinga muchishishisa chakuliwana nakushimutwila meso nameso.”

Shimbu jimwe jishinga jinakulingisanga vatu vashinganyeke nge valizanga chikuma. Chakutalilaho, Brian * wamyaka yakusemuka 22 ambile ngwenyi: “Ngwashinganyekele ngwami kutuminanga mijimbu masepa jami hashinga chinahase kuzamisa usepa wetu. Kutwala muze ngwechele kuvatumina mangana ngumone iya anguzanga uze mwangutuminanga. Oloze vavandende kaha vangutuminyinenga. Oholyapwa jino ngwecha kulitumina namasepa vamwe.”

Kulitumina mijimbu chinahase kukukafwa uzamise usepa wove navakwenu, oloze kulitambukilanga chikiko chinahase kuzamisa chikuma usepa wenu. Kakavulu kuhanjika hajishinga cheji kulingisanga vatu vashimutwila kaha, oloze kachazamisa chikuma usepako.

Omu wapwa usepa wamwenemwene. Mbimbiliya yavuluka ngwayo sepa lyamutu “mwalipanjika nasepa lyenyi kuhambakana ndumbwenyi.” (Vishimo 18:24) Uno mutu wangana ikiye mwasaka apwenga sepa lyenu tahi? Uno omu mukiko mwapwa nayenu tahi? Hakusaka ukumbulule vihula kana, soneka vyuma vitatu vize musaka sepa lyove akulingile. Kufumaho, soneka vyuma vitatu vize musaka ulingile sepa lyove. Jino lihulise ngwove, ‘Havyuma kanevi ngunasoneka, sepa lyami muka eji kusololanga vyuma kana hashinga? Kutala nayami ngweji kusolwelanga masepa jami vyuma kana tahi?’—Lushimbi lwamuMbimbiliya: Wavaka-Fwilipi 2:4.

Tachikizenu vyuma vyavilemu. Usepa wahashinga wapendamina kaha hakushimutwila havyuma vize mwazanga. Oloze usepa weji kuzama chikuma nge namushimutwilanga vyuma vyavilemu vyamukuyoya kuhambakana vize mwazanga kaha. Leanne wamyaka yakusemuka 21 ambile ngwenyi: “Ngwatwama kaha namasepa vavandende, kaha veji kungulingisanga ngupwenga mutu wamwaza.”—Lushimbi lwamuMbimbiliya: Vishimo 13:20.

Tambukilenunga masepa jenu. Chapwa chachilemu kuhanjika nasepa lyenu meso nameso mwomwo cheji kulingisanga mumone numba nge sepa lyenu napihilila chipwe nawahilila omu mwahanjika nalizu lyenyi, nomu mwazachisa mujimba.—Lushimbi lwamuMbimbiliya: Wavaka-Tesolonyika 1, 2:17.

Kulisonekela mikanda. Numba tuhu kulisonekela mikanda yasoloka nge jila yakushikulu, oloze mutu hakutwama nakusoneka mukanda wosena, chasolola nge apwanga nakukushinganyeka chikuma, kaha nawa akuzanga. Chuma kana kacheshi nakusoloka makumbi anoko, hakuwana nge vatu vali namilimo chikuma. Chakutalilaho, mukanda waAlone Together, uze asonekele Sherry Turkle avulukamo vyamukweze umwe uze ahanjikile ngwenyi kanda vamusonekeleho lyehi mukanda kuli mutu mukuyoya chenyi. Ambile ngwenyi ngweji kushinganyekanga ngwami, “kachi kungwapwile halwola luze vatu valisonekelele mikanda kunyima.” Shikaho, chapwa chamwaza kusonekela mikanda sepa lyenu kuhambakana kuvatuminanga kaha tumijimbu twatwihi hashinga.

Chuma chachilemu: Kutunga usepa wamwenemwene kachapwa kaha kulitumina chipwe kulisonekele mijimbu hashingako. Chasakiwa kuliwana nakushimutwila meso nameso nakulisolwela zangi, nalikoji, nakulikonekela, navilinga vyeka vyamwaza. Vilinga kana vikiko vyeji kuzamisanga usepa wavatu. Oloze kamweshi kusolola vilinga kana hashingako.