Nge mwana nasemuka, mweji kuhita myaka yayindende kaha nakukola. Nge kanyike walunga chipwe wapwevo naputuka kukola, kwatwama vyuma vimwe vize vyeji kuputukanga kusoloka kumujimba wenyi.

Uno munahase kumukafwa ngachilihi mwanenu atachikize ukalu watwamaho shimbu kanda lwola kana luhete?

Lwola lwakukula kumujimba lwalisezaseza. Vanyike vamwe veji kukula nge vali namyaka yakusemuka 8, veka 10 chipwe vene kuya helu. Mukanda waLetting Go With Love and Confidence wahanjika ngwavo, “Vanyike valisezaseza mumyaka yakukula kumujimba.”

Nge mwana nakulu eji kulizakaminanga. Omu vana veji kuputukanga kukokela kumyaka yaukweze veji kuputuka kulizakamina. Jared * ambile ngwenyi, “Omu ngwahetele halwola kana, ngwalizakaminyine mwomwo ngwaputukile kusoloka mweka kumujimba nakulinga vyuma vyaungeji. Omu ngwapwile navakwetu ngwevwilenga nge nguwakulihandununa.” Kulifwelela chikuma nawa chinahase kulingisa mutu aputuke kulizakamina. Kellie wamwaka yakusemuka 17 ambile ngwenyi, “Ngwevwilenga ngwami kumeso ami kuli nakwalumuka, kaha lwola lumwe ngwalililenga.”

Kulivanga kukula cheji kuneha ukalu. Nge kanyike wapwevo nalivange kusoka mavele shimbu achili wamundende, vakwavo vanyike veji kumusehanga. Mukanda umwe wamba ngwavo, “Vanyike vangana veji kulingisanga vakweze vamalunga vaputuke kufwila kulisavala navo.”—A Parent’s Guide to the Teen Years.

Nge kanyike nakulu, kachalumbununa nge nakoloko. Mukanda waVishimo 22:15 wamba ngwavo, “Mumuchima wamukweze mwatwama uleya,” kwinyikila chamwishi. Ngocho kukula kacheshi kulingisa mwana apwenga namanganako. Mukanda umwe wamba ngwawo, “Vanyike vamwe vanahase kuvuvumuka kaha mujimba, oloze kaveshi kuhasa kupwa nachinyingi, namangana, numba vene muchima wakutalila vatu chikokiko.”—You and Your Adolescent.

Shimutwilenu namwanenu shimbu kanda myaka yakukula yihete. Numba mwanenu apwa walunga chipwe wapwevo, mulwezenu atachikize vyuma mwakamona omu mwakakula. Kukola kumujimba cheji kuputukanga kala lwola, kaha kanyike nahase kwivwa kupihya likumbi lyatete. Omu namushimutwilanga chihande kana, mwatela kuvalweza ngwenu kukula kumujimba chapwa chachilemu mwomwo cheji kusolola nge mujimba jino unaputuka kukola.—Lushimbi lwamuMbimbiliya: Samu 139:14.

Kanda kuhita mutengako. Kanyike walunga John ambile ngwenyi, “Omu visemi jami vapwile nakushimutwila nayami hachihande kana, vapwile kaha nakutangisa. Kavangulumbunwinyine hatoma vyuma vyosenako.” Alana wamyaka 17 nayikiye ambile ngwenyi, “Mama angulwezelenga vyuma vyasolokele kumujimba wami, oloze kangulwezele mwakulingila halwola kanako.” Vyuma muka natulinangulaho? Visemi vatela kulwezanga hatoma vana vavo vyuma vyosena vyakukola chamujimba.—Lushimbi lwamuMbimbiliya: Vilinga 20:20.

Muhulisenu vihula mangana mushimutwile. Mulwezenu vyakutalilaho vyavatu veka vaze vahita muvyuma kana. Chakutalilaho, munahase kuhulisa mwanenu wapwevo ngwenu, “Uno vakwenu vaka-shikola veji kuhanjikanga vyakukula tahi?” “Uno veji kusekelekanga vaze kanda vakule tahi?” Munahase nawa kuhulisa mwanenu walunga ngwenu, “Uno vakwenu vanyike veji kusekelekanga vakwavo vaze kanda vavukule tahi?” Nge vanyike vanaputuka kuhanjika vyakukola kumujimba, cheji kuvakafwa vatachikize vyuma navakahitamo nge vanahete halwola kana. Nge vanatachikiza, kaha navakavangiza mazu akwamba ngwavo: “Mutu himutu anguhwenga kwivwilila, ashipwokelenga kuhanjika.”—WaYakova 1:19.

Vakafwenu valame “mangana amwenemwene nauhashi wakushinganyeka.” (Vishimo 3:21) Kukola kumujimba kachalumbununa nge mutu nakolo muvishinganyekako. Halwola kana kanyike eji kuputuka kulinangula mwakusakwila vyuma mukuyoya. Shikaho, visemi vatela kumona lwola kana kupwa lwamwaza kunangula vana vavo vatachikize muchalumbunukila kukola kumujimba.—Lushimbi lwamuMbimbiliya: WavaHepeleu 5:14.

Kanda kuzeyako. Vanyike vamwe veji kuchiwananga kupwa chachikalu kuhulisa visemi javo vavalweze muchalumbunukila kukula kumujimba. Mukanda waYou and Your Adolescent wamba ngwawo: “Vana vamwe veji kuhola kulu nge muli nakuvalweza vyuma, oloze veji kwivwako nakukavyanuka kulutwe.”