• Indodana yakho iyaziphakamisa kodwa ileminyaka engu-10 kuphela.

• Ifuna ukuthi wonke umuntu ayiphathe angani iyinkosi.

Uyazibuza ukuthi, ‘Ungenwe yini umntwana lo? Angifuni ukuthi azikhangelele phansi kodwa angifuni lokuthi azibone engcono kulabanye.’

Kungenzakala yini ukuthi ufundise umntanakho ukuthi athobeke ungazange umenze ukuthi azikhangelele phansi?

Eminyakeni esanda kwedlula abazali bebekhuthazwa ukuthi benze lokho okufunwa ngabantwababo, bahlale bebancoma lanxa bengenzanga lutho oluncomekayo njalo bangabakhuzi loba babalaye. Kwakucatshangwa ukuthi nxa abantwana bangaphathwa njengeqanda abasoze bazikhangelele phansi nxa bangakhula. Kodwa kube layiphi impumela? Elinye ibhuku lithi: “Kulokuthi abantwana babe lembeko njalo babe ngabathokozayo lokhu kwenze ukuthi bazikhukhumeze futhi bazibone bengcono kulabanye.”

Abantwana abanengi abakhuliswa bephongunconywa nje bakhula bengakhangelelanga ukuthi bangadaniswa, beyiswe njalo bangaphumeleli kwezinye izikhathi. Bakhuliswa ngendlela yokuthi baqakathekise okufunwa yibo yikho nxa sebekhulile kuba nzima ukuthi babelobungane obuhlala isikhathi eside labanye. Lokhu kwenza ukuthi bacine behlutshwa yikukhathazeka kanye lokuhlulukelwa.

Abantwana ababi lesithunzi ngokuhlala betshelwa ukuthi baligugu kodwa ngokusebenza nzima ukuze baphumelele. Lokhu kutsho ukuthi akumelanga bazithembe kakhulu kodwa kumele babe lolwazi njalo bathuthukise ubungcitshi babo ekwenzeni okuthile. (IZaga 22:29) Kanti njalo kumele babe lendaba lalokho okufunwa ngabanye. (1 KwabaseKhorinte 10:24) Ukuze bakwenze konke lokhu kumele bathobeke.

Mncome nxa kufanele. Ncoma indodakazi yakho nxa ingenza kuhle emhlolisweni esikolo. Ungasoli umbalisi nxa ingenzanga kuhle. Ukwenza njalo akusoze kuyincede ukuthi ifunde ukuthobeka. Kodwa kumele uyincede ibone ukuthi ingenzani ukuze iphumelele esikhathini esizayo. Yincome kuphela nxa yenze kuhle.

Mlaye nxa kudingeka. Akumelanga usole umntanakho kuwo wonke amaphutha awenzayo. (KwabaseKholose 3:21) Kodwa nxa angaphambanisa kakhulu kumele umlaye. Ngitsho lanxa elombono ongaqondanga ngezinto kumele umsize. Ungekela angacina ekhula lakho.

Ngokwesibonelo, nxa indodana yakho ijayele ukuzikhukhumeza, ungekela ukuyiqondisa ingacina izibona ingcono kulabanye futhi ibaninele khatshana. Ngakho mchasisele umntanakho ukuthi ukuzikhukhumeza kungamenza abe ngumuntu omubi futhi acine eyangeka. (IZaga 27:2) Mtshele lokuthi umuntu othobekileyo kahambi etshela abanye ngezinto ayenelisa ukuzenza. Ukumlaya ngalindlela elothando kuzamfundisa ukuthi athobeke kodwa angazikhangeleli phansi.​—Isimiso seBhayibhili: UMathewu 23:12.

Mfundise okuyikho okwenzakala empilweni. Ukwenzela umntwana konke akucelayo kungamona. Ngokwesibonelo nxa efuna ulutho ungelamali yakhona kumele umchazele ukuthi kungani kuqakathekile ukuthi liphile ngalokho elikwenelisayo. Kwesinye isikhathi nxa kwehlule ukuthi liye lapho ebelifuna ukuvakatshela khona, kumele umtshele ukuthi ukungaphumeleli kwezinye izinto kuyenzakala empilweni futhi ungaxoxa laye ngokuthi wena kuyini okwenzayo nxa kungaba njalo. Kulokuthi umvikele kubo bonke ubunzima bempilo, zama ukumsiza ukuze enelise ukulwisana lobunzima nxa esekhulile.​—Isimiso seBhayibhili: IZaga 29:21.

Mfundise ukupha. Mtshengise umntanakho ukuthi “ukupha kubusisekile okudlula ukwamukela.” (ImiSebenzi 20:35) Ungakwenza njani lokhu? Lingabhala phansi abantu abadinga uncedo lokuthengelwa okuthile ezitolo, ukuhanjiswa ngemota loba ukulungiselwa okuthile endlini. Hamba laye umntanakho nxa lincedisa labo bantu. Tshengisa umntanakho ukuthi uyathokoza lokuthi uyasuthiseka nxa unceda abanye. Ungenza njalo, bazafunda ukuthobeka ngokulingisela isibonelo sakho.​—Isimiso seBhayibhili: ULukha 6:38.