1, 2. (a) Chaza ukuthi abelusi bako-Israyeli babelawuphi umsebenzi. (b) Abazali bafanana njani labelusi?

 ENDULO ko-Israyeli abelusi babesebenza gadalala kungelani lokuthi kwakutshisa bhe kumbe kuqanda kakhulu. Kwakufanele bavikele imihlambi yabo enyamazaneni eziyingozi kanye lamasela. Babezihlola kokuphela izimvu njalo beselapha ezazingabe zigula kumbe zilimele. Amazinyane ayesanda kuzalwa ayenakekelwa kakhulu ngoba ayeyabe engakaqini okuyangaphi njengezinye izimvu emhlambini.​—Gen. 33:13.

² Ngamanye amazwi, abazali abangamaKhristu kumele banakekele abantwana njengabelusi ababenakekela izimvu zabo. Balomsebenzi wokukhulisa abantwababo “ngokufundisa langokulaya kweNkosi.” (Efe. 6:4) Lo kakusiwo msebenzi olula. USathane usebenzisa amanga ukuze ahuge abantwana njalo basengozini yokuthatheka ngezinkanuko zobutsha. (2 Tim. 2:22; 1 Joh. 2:16) Nxa ungumzali ungabanceda njani abantwabakho? Ukuze ubeluse kuhle, kumele ubazi, ubondle njalo ubalaye. Kasixoxeni ngezinto lezi ezintathu.

3. Abazali kumele benzeni ukuze ‘basazi isimo’ sabantwababo?

³ Umalusi omuhle uyayihlola ngonanzelelo imvu yinye ngayinye ukuze abe leqiniso lokuthi iphilile. Lokhu yikho kanye okumele ukwenze ebantwaneni bakho. IBhayibhili lithi: “Kumele usazi kuhle isimo sezimvu zakho.” (Zaga. 27:23, NW) Yikho-ke ukuze ubazi kuhle abantwabakho kumele unanzelele izenzo zabo, imicabango yabo kanye lemizwa yabo. Ungakwenza njani lokhu? Okuqakatheke kakhulu yikuhlala uxoxa labo.

4, 5. (a) Abazali bangenzani ukuze abantwababo bakhululeke ukuxoxa labo (Khangela umfanekiso osekuqaliseni.) (b) Wena kuyini okwenzayo ukuze abantwabakho bakhululeke ukuxoxa lawe?

⁴ Abanye abazali sebakunanzelela ukuthi kubanzima ukuxoxa labantwana ikakhulu nxa abangabafana sebesiba ngamajaha lanxa abangamankazana sebethomba. Mhlawumbe abantwana kuyabe sokubayangisa ukuveza imizwa yabo kanye lalokho abakucabangayo. Nxa kuyikuthi umntanakho usenjalo, kuyini ongakwenza? Zama ukuthi uxoxe laye ngesikhathi lizikwejisele kulokuthi wenze angani usumfake edale. (Dute. 6:6, 7) Kungadingakala ukuthi uzinike isikhathi sokuthi ube lomntanakho. Mhlawumbe lingenza imisebenzi yangekhaya ndawonye, lidlale umdlalo othile kumbe liphume lihambahambe nje. Ukwenza izinto lezi ndawonye kungamnceda ukuthi akhululeke ukukuvulela isifuba sakhe.

⁵ Kodwa kuyini ongakwenza nxa umntanakho elokhu engafuni ukuxoxa lawe? Ungazama ezinye izindlela. Ngokwesibonelo mtshele ukuthi wena ubusenzani kulokuthi umbuze ukuthi yena utshone esenzani. Lokhu kungenza ukuthi laye akhululeke ukukuxoxela ukuthi belinjani ilanga lakhe. Kanti njalo nxa ufuna ukubona ukuthi umntanakho ucabangani ngendaba ethile, buza imibuzo okulula ukuthi ayiphendule hatshi eqophe yena. Ungambuza ukuthi abangane bakhe bona bathini, ubusubuza lokuthi yena angabaxwayisa njani.

6. Ungatshengisa njani ukuthi uyangeneka lokuthi ulaso isikhathi sokuxoxa?

⁶ Kuzabalula ukuthi abantwabakho bakuvulele isifuba nxa bebona ukuthi uyangeneka njalo uyazinika isikhathi sokuxoxa labo. Kodwa uma abazali behlala bephathekile okokuthi bakhanya bengelaso lesikhathi sokuxoxa, abantwana bangacina bengasabatsheli okubakhathazayo. Ungenzani ukuze kukhanye ukuthi uyangeneka? Akumelanga uphonguthi, “Ungabuya sizoxoxa loba nini.” Kodwa abantwabakho kumele bangathandabuzi ukuthi nxa bekutshela okubakhathazayo kawusoze ukuthathe lula lokuthi kawusoze uvuke ngolaka. Abazali abanengi benza kuhle kulokhu. Enye intombazana eleminyaka engu-19 okuthiwa nguKayla ithi: “Nxa ngilobaba ngikhululekile ukuxoxa laye loba yini. Kangibambi umlomo nxa ngisakhuluma njalo kangahluleli kodwa uyalalela, abesengeluleka kuhle.”

7. (a) Chaza ukuthi umzali angatshengisa njani ukuthi uyazwisisa nxa kuxoxwa ngezindaba zothando. (b) Kuyini okungenza abantwana bacine bengasatsheli abazali babo lokho okubakhathazayo?

⁷ Lanxa uxoxa lomntanakho ngezindaba ezingani ziyatshisa, ngokwesibonelo ezothando, kumele umfundise ukuthi angakuphatha njani lokhu ngendlela eyiyo kulokuthi ugcizelele ububi bakho kuphela. Ake sithi usekhefa besebekunika iphepha ababhale kulo ukudla abakuthengisayo, kodwa uthi uyabala uthole ukuthi kubhalwe kuphela ukuthi ukudla kwalapha kungakwenza ugule ubangwe lezibi. Kusegcekeni ukuthi ungahle uphume udinge enye indawo engcono. Abantwabakho labo bangacina bengasakulandi nxa ungahlala ubaxwayisa ngokubatshela izinto ezimbi kuphela ezingabehlela. (Bala uKholose 3:21.) Zama ukuveza ubuhle balokho abakubuza khona kulokuthi ukhulume okubi kuphela. Omunye udadewethu oleminyaka engu-25 okuthiwa ngu-Emily uthi: “Nxa abazali bami bekhuluma lami ngezothando, kabenzi angani yinto embi. Bayacacisa ukuthi kuyathokozisa ukwazana lomuntu  othile lokuthola umuntu ozatshada laye. Yikho ngikhululekile ukuxoxa labo ngezothando. Ngingathandana lomuntu othile kangingeke ngibafihlele abazali bami.”

8, 9. (a) Kunceda ngani ukulalelisisa nxa umntanakho ekhuluma? (b) Wena kukuncede ngani ukulalela abantwabakho?

⁸ Ungatshengisa ukuthi uyangeneka njengoyise kaKayla ngokulalela abantwabakho ngesineke nxa bekhuluma. (Bala uJakhobe 1:19.) Omunye umama okuthiwa nguKatia uthi “Kwakunginzimela ukubekezelela umntanami oyinkazana. Wayesithi nxa ekhuluma ngihle ngimgame engakaqedi. Kwezinye izikhathi ngangiyabe ngidinwe ngifile kumbe ngisizwa ngingafuni ukuhlutshwa. Kodwa ngenxa yokuthi sengantshintsha laye sewantshintsha. Khathesi usekhululekile ukungitshela okusenhliziyweni yakhe.”

⁹ Omunye ubaba okuthiwa nguRonald laye kwakunzima ukuthi axoxe lendodakazi yakhe. Uthi: “Umntanami wathi engitshela ukuthi wayesethandana lomfana othile esikolo ngazonda kakhulu. Kodwa ngathi ngikhumbula ukuthi uJehova uyazibekezelela izinceku zakhe lokuthi uyazizwisisa, ngabona kungcono ukuthi ngimnike isikhathi sokuveza imizwa yakhe ngingakamqondisi. Ngiyathokoza ukuthi ngakwenza lokhu. Ngazwisisa mhlalokho ukuthi indodakazi yami izizwa njani. Yathi iqeda ukukhuluma kwasekulula ukuthi ngikhulume layo kuhle. Okwangimangalisayo yikuthi yalalelisisa lokho engangiyitshela khona yaze yathembisa lokuthi izantshintsha izenzo zayo.” Ukuhlala uxoxa labantwabakho kuzakunceda ukuthi uyazi kuhle imizwa yabo kanye lemicabango yabo. Lokhu kuzakwenza ukuthi bavume ukuthi ubancedise nxa besenza izinqumo ezimpilweni zabo. *

10, 11. Kuyini ongakwenza ukuze abantwabakho bangaphambuki?

¹⁰ Umelusi omuhle uyakwazi ukuthi loba yiphi imvu yakhe ingaphambuka emhlambini. Mhlawumbe iyabe ibona angani phambidlana kulotshani obuluhlaza, iphinde futhi ihawukele obunye obukhatshana okungenza icine isehlukana lomhlambi. Yikho okungenzakala emntwaneni. Angayengwa ngabangane ababi kumbe azilibazise ngezinto ezimbi acine sephambuka kancane kancane endleleni eyiyo. (Zaga. 13:20) Kuyini ongakwenza ukuze lokhu kungenzakali ebantwaneni bakho?

 ¹¹ Nxa ufundisa abantwabakho ubusunanzelela ukuthi kulalapho okumele balungisise khona, ungathikazi ukubasiza. Zama ukubanceda ukuthi bathuthukise izimpawu zobuntu ezinhle abalazo. (2 Phet. 1:5-8) Lokhu ungakwenza ikakhulu ngesikhathi sokukhonza kwemuli. INkonzo YoMbuso ka-October 2008 yakugcizelela lokhu yathi: “Izinhloko zezimuli zikhuthazwa ukuthi ziwufeze umsebenzi lo eziwuphiwe nguJehova ukuze zibe leqiniso lokuthi kwenziwa isifundo seBhayibhili semuli esilohlonzi zikhathi zonke.” Usisebenzisa kuhle yini isikhathi lesi ukuze weluse abantwabakho? Woba leqiniso lokuthi bayabona ukuthi wenza konke okusemandleni akho ukuze ubafundise.​—Mat. 5:6; Mat 6:33.

12. (a) Ukuba lokukhonza kwemuli zikhathi zonke kubancede njani abasakhulayo? (Khangela lebhokisi elithi “ Bayakukholisa Kakhulu.”) (b) Wena kukuncede njani ukukhonza kwemuli?

¹² Udadewethu oleminyaka engu-19 okuthiwa nguCarissa uyachaza ukuthi uKukhonza Kwemuli kubancede njani emulini yangakibo. Uthi: “Kuyangithokozisa ukuthi siyenelisa ukuhlala phansi sixoxe sindawonye. Lokhu kwenza ukuthi sizwanane kakhulu njalo senze izinto esizahlala sizikhumbula. Ubaba kafuni sikhuthe ukwenza uKukhonza Kwemuli loba sekutheni. Kuyangikhuthaza ukuthi uyakuqakathekisa njalo lokhu kungenza lami ngingakuthathi lula. Kanti njalo kwenza ngimhloniphe kakhulu.” Omunye udadewethu okuthiwa nguBrittney oleminyaka engu-23 wathi: “Ukukhonza kwemuli kwenze ukuthi mina labazali bami sibe ngamathe lolimi. Kungenza ngibone ukuthi balendaba lami sibili lokuthi bayafuna ukuzwa ukuthi kuyini okungikhathazayo. Kuyasinceda lokuthi sibe yimuli ebambeneyo.” Kuyakhanya-ke ukuthi ukuze ube ngumelusi omuhle kufanele wondle abantwabakho ngokubafundisa ikakhulu nxa lisenza ukukhonza kwemuli. *

13. Ungamsiza njani umntanakho ukuthi abe lesifiso sokukhonza uJehova?

¹³ Umelusi omuhle usebenzisa induku ukuze aqondise umhlambi wakhe njalo awuvikele. Okunye ayabe ekuhlosile yikuqhuba izimvu zakhe azise “emadlelweni amahle.” (Hez. 34:13, 14) Akuthandabuzwa ukuthi lawe yikho kanye okuhlosileyo. Ufuna ukulaya abantwabakho ukuze bakhonze uJehova. Kanti njalo ufisa ukuthi abantwabakho baveze imizwa enjengoyomhubi owabhala wathi: “Ngiyakunxwanela ukwenza intando yakho, O Nkulunkulu wami; umthetho wakho usenhliziyweni yami.” (Hubo. 40:8) Abantwana abazizwa njengomhubi bazazinikela kuJehova njalo babhaphathizwe. Kodwa lokhu kumele bakwenze nxa sebesenelisa ukuzikhethela njalo sebelesifiso esiqotho sokukhonza uJehova.

14, 15. (a) Kuyini okumele abazali abangamaKhristu bakusebenzele gadalala? (b) Kuyini okungabangela ukuthi umntwana athandabuze ukukhonza kweqiniso?

¹⁴ Ungenzani nxa abantwabakho bengathuthuki ekukhonzeni njalo bekhanya bethandabuza ukuthi abakukholwayo kuliqiniso? Kuzamele usebenze gadalala ukuze ubasize bamthande uJehova uNkulunkulu njalo bambonge ngakho konke akwenzileyo. (Isam. 4:11) Nxa sebesenelisa ukwenza lokhu kuzaba lula ukuthi bazikhethele ukumkhonza.

¹⁵ Kodwa ungamelusa njani umntanakho nxa esethandabuza? Ungamsiza njani ukuze abone ukuthi akulanto engcono kulokukhonza uJehova lokuthi kungenza athokoze kuze kube nini lanini? Dingisisa ukuthi kungani ekhanya elensolo. Ngokwesibonelo zibuze ukuthi indodana yakho kayikukholwa yini ekufunda eBhayibhilini kumbe iphonguzizwa ingelasibindi sokukhuluma ngakho nxa ilabangane bayo? Kambe indodakazi yakho kayikuboni sibili ukuthi izimiso zikaNkulunkulu ziyanceda kumbe yikuthi ihlutshwa yisizungu  njalo ibona angani akulamuntu olendaba layo?

16, 17. Abazali bangabanceda njani abantwababo ukuze iqiniso libe ngumqhele ezinhliziyweni zabo?

¹⁶ Nxa umntanakho ethandabuza iqiniso ngenxa yezizatho ezithile, ungamnceda ukuthi akukhuphe konke ukuthandabuza angabe elakho. Njani? Elinye iqhinga eselincede abazali abanengi ukuthi benze lokhu yikubuza abantwababo imibuzo le: “Ukubona njani ukuba ngumKhristu? Ubona angani kunceda ngani? Ubona angani kuyini okunzima ngokuba ngumKhristu? Ubona angani ukuphila ungamkhonzi uJehova kungakwenza uthole okunengi yini ukwedlula lokho okukholiswa ngamaKhristu khathesi lalokho azakuthola esikhathini esizayo? Kungani usitsho njalo?” Imibuzo le kumele uyibeke ngamazwi akho langendlela ezakwenza ukuthi lizwisisane labantwabakho kulokuthi ubuze angani ungumtshutshisi emthethwandaba. Engxoxweni yenu lingasebenzisa loMakho 10:29, 30. Abanye abantwana bangakhetha ukuthi bathathe iphepha, kwelinye icele babhale ukuthi kunzima ngani ukuba ngumKhristu kwelinye babhale ukuthi kunceda ngani. Ukuhlola lokho abakubhalileyo kungabanceda babone ukuthi uhlupho lungaphi lokuthi bangalungisisa njani. Sijayele ukufunda labantu amabhuku la amabili, elithi IBhayibhili Lifundisani Sibili? lelithi “Zigcineni Lisethandweni lukaNkulunkulu.” Lokhu kutsho ukuthi abantu bokuqala okumele sifunde labo amabhuku la ngabantwabethu. Liyakwenza yini bazali?

¹⁷ Sizafika isikhathi sokuthi abantwana bazikhethele ukuthi ngubani abazamkhonza. Ungacabangi ukuthi kuzazenzakalela ukuthi abantwabakho babe lokholo njengawe. Kumele benze iqiniso libe ngumqhele ezinhliziyweni zabo. (Zaga. 3:1, 2) Nxa kuyikuthi umntanakho kuyamhlupha ukwenza lokhu, zama ukubuyela emuva ezintweni ake wazifunda. Msize ukuthi acabangisise ngemibuzo enjengale: “Ngikwazi njani ukuthi uNkulunkulu ukhona? Kuyini okwenza ngingathandabuzi ukuthi uJehova uNkulunkulu uyangiqakathekisa sibili? Kungani ngikholwa ukuthi izimiso zikaJehova zinceda mina?” Zama ukuba ngumelusi omuhle ngokuba lesineke nxa ulaya umntanakho kumbe abantwabakho ukuze babone ukuthi akulalutho umuntu angalwenza empilweni olungedlula ukukhonza uJehova. *​—Rom. 12:2.

18. Abazali bangamlingisela njani uJehova onguMelusi oMkhulu?

¹⁸ Wonke amaKhristu eqiniso afuna ukulingisela uMelusi oMkhulu. (Efe. 5:1; 1 Phet. 2:25) Kodwa bazali libonile ukuthi yini okumele lisazi kuhle isimo sezimvu zenu, okutsho abantwabenu abaligugu. Kanti njalo kumele lenze konke elingakwenza ukuze libalaye besebethola izibusiso abazigcinelwe nguJehova. Yikho-ke lingayekeli ukwelusa abantwabenu. Qhubekani libondla ngendlela yeqiniso.