Achinyamata Akufunsa Kuti . . .

Kodi Cholakwika N’chiyani ndi Kugonana kwa pa Telefoni?

“KUGONANA KWA PA TELEFONI,” malinga ndi magazini ina yotchuka kwambiri ku America, “kwaloŵa m’malo mwa makalata achikondi ndipo kwakhala njira yolankhulirana zachikondi pakati pa mwamuna ndi mkazi amene akukhala motalikirana.”

Kodi kugonana kwa pa telefoni n’kutani? Kumeneku ndiko kulankhula kapena kumvetsera nkhani zolaula zodzutsa chilakolako chogonana. * Anthu amene amachita zimenezi nthaŵi zambiri amaseŵeretsa maliseche pofuna kudzisangalatsa kuti aupeze mtima. Anthu ambiri akukonda kugonana kwa pa telefoni, kaya amene akukambirana nkhani zolaulazo ndi anthu amene ali pachibwenzi kapena omwe sakudziŵana n’komwe. Ndipotu, ena akulimbikitsa poyera khalidwe limeneli.

Mkazi wina anati: “Kumeneku n’kugonana kotetezeka kwambiri.” Mwachionekere, anthu ena amavomerezana naye. Mwachitsanzo, mu October 2000, pofuna kuchepetsa chiŵerengero cha anthu amene akutenga kachilombo ka HIV, gulu la akatswiri a zaumoyo a ku Russia analimbikitsa kugonana kwa pa telefoni polengeza mu nyuzipepala.

Komabe, anthu ena amalimbikitsa kugonana kwa pa telefoni pongofuna kupeza ndalama basi. Anthu ochita malonda a kugonana kwa pa telefoni, kumene anthu amapereka ndalama kuti amvetsere zinthu zolaula, akupeza ndalama madola mabiliyoni ambiri ku United States kokha.

Komano n’chifukwa chiyani anthu ambiri akukonda khalidwe limeneli? Buku lakuti The Fantasy Factory limafotokoza kuti: “Kugonana kwenikweni komanso kusonyezana chikondi moonana maso ndi maso n’kwangozi. Pali mavuto monga kutenga matenda opatsirana m’njira ya chiwerewere, mbiri ya munthu ingaipe kapena ntchito yake ikhoza kusokonezeka ngati zimene wachitazo zadziŵika, angamaope kuti ena amudzudzula ndiponso kuopa zotsatirapo  za chilakolako ‘chachilendo.’ Kugonana kwa pa telefoni kumachepetsa mavuto ameneŵa.”

N’zoona kuti kugonana kwa pa telefoni sikufuna kuti anthuwo akumane. Koma kodi zimenezi zikutanthauza kuti palibe cholakwika kuchita zimenezo kapena palibe vuto lililonse limene lingakhalepo?

Kodi Kugonana kwa pa Telefoni Kulibe Vuto?

Chilakolako chogonana chimakhala chachikulu kwambiri paunyamata. Baibulo limatcha nthaŵi imeneyi pamene chilakolako cha kugonana chimafika pachimake kuti ndi pa “unamwali.” (1 Akorinto 7:36) Panthaŵi yofunika kwambiri imeneyi, mnyamata kapena mtsikana wachikristu ayenera kuphunzira “kukhala nacho chotengera chake m’chiyeretso ndi ulemu.” (1 Atesalonika 4:4) Zimenezi zikutanthauza kuti muyenera kuphunzira mmene mungathanire ndiponso kulamulira chilakolako chanu cha kugonana. Zimenezi n’zofunika kwambiri kuti munthu aziona moyenera nkhani ya kugonana.

Koma kugonana kwa pa telefoni kumaphunzitsa munthu kukhutiritsa chilakolako chake cha kugonana m’malo mochilamulira. Kuwonjezeranso pamenepo, kumalimbikitsa kuti amuna aziwaona molakwika akazi kapena akazi aziona molakwika amuna. Baibulo limaphunzitsa kuti anthu okwatirana okha ndi amene ayenera kugonana. (Ahebri 13:4) Koma kugonana kwa pa telefoni kumaphunzitsa achinyamata kuti azisangalala ndi kugonana asanakwatire kapena kukwatiwa. Baibulo limaphunzitsa kuti munthu amapeza chimwemwe chenicheni ngati akupatsa, osati kulandira. (Machitidwe 20:35) Koma kugonana kwa pa telefoni kumaphunzitsa munthu kudyera masuku pamutu anthu ena kuti akwaniritse zofuna zake. Baibulo limaphunzitsa anthu okwatirana kuti akhale pa ubwenzi weniweni mwa kukulitsa chikondi ndi kukhulupirirana. (Aefeso 5:22, 33) Koma kugonana kwa pa telefoni kumalimbikitsa kusasonyeza chikondi ndiponso kudzibisa.

Chizoloŵezi Chowononga Munthu

Mzinda wakale wa Korinto unali wotchuka kwambiri ndi makhalidwe oipa. N’chifukwa chake mtumwi Paulo analembera Akristu a kumeneko kuti: “Ndiopa, kuti pena, monga njoka inanyenga Heva ndi kuchenjerera kwake, maganizo anu angaipsidwe kusiyana nako kuona mtima ndi kuyera mtima zili kwa Kristu.” (2 Akorinto 11:3) Kugonana kwa pa telefoni ndi njira ina imene Satana Mdyerekezi akugwiritsa ntchito kuti aipitse achinyamata masiku ano.

Kwa achinyamata ambiri, kuimba telefoni pa nambala yoti alankhulane ndi munthu wina nkhani zolaula kwakhala chizoloŵezi chosalamulirika. Mnyamata wina amene timutche kuti Jim akusonyeza mmene anthu ena angakhalire ndi “chizoloŵezi” chimenechi. Jim anaona nambala ya telefoni pa chikwangwani cholengezera malonda yomwe angaimbe kuti amve zolaula. Analoŵeza nambalayo ndipo patapita nthaŵi anaimba pongofuna kudziŵa kuti chimachitika n’chiyani. Kenako anayamba kumaimba telefoni pa nambalayo pafupipafupi. Pasanapite nthaŵi yaitali, anapeza kuti ndalama zoti alipire chifukwa choimba telefoni zinakwana madola 600.

Kudzutsa zilakolako zogonana musanakwatire kapena kukwatiwa kumatsutsana ndi malangizo a Mawu a Mulungu. Mawu akewo amati: “Chifukwa chake fetsani ziŵalozo zili padziko; dama, chidetso, chifunitso cha manyazi [“chilakolako cha kugonana,” NW].”—Akolose 3:5.

Kuopsa kwa Khalidweli pa Chibwenzi

Bwanji za anthu okulirapo amene ali pachibwenzi choti akwatirana? N’zoona kuti n’kwachibadwa kuti anthu amene akukondana afune kusonyezana chikondi. Kale m’nthaŵi za m’Baibulo, mtsikana wina woopa Mulungu pofotokoza za mnyamata amene ankafuna kukwatirana naye anati: “Ndine wa wokondedwa wanga mnyamatayo, ndine amene andifunayo.” (Nyimbo ya Solomo 7:10) Tsiku la ukwati likamayandikira, n’koyenera kuti anthu amene ali pachitomero akambirane nkhani zina zokhudza kugonana. Koma kodi kugonana kwa pa telefoni ndi njira yabwino yosonyezera chikondi?

Ayi. Anthu amene ali pachibwenzi nawonso ayenera kutsatira malangizo a mtumwi Paulo akuti: “Dama ndi chidetso chonse, kapena chisiriro, zisatchulidwe ndi kutchulidwa komwe mwa inu, monga kuyenera oyera mtima; kapena chinyanso, ndi kulankhula zopanda pake, kapena zopusa zimene siziyenera; koma makamaka chiyamiko. Pakuti ichi muchidziŵe kuti wadama yense, kapena wachidetso, kapena wosirira,  amene apembedza mafano, alibe choloŵa m’ufumu wa Kristu ndi Mulungu.”—Aefeso 5:3-5; Akolose 3:8.

Mwachionekere, kukambirana nkhani zimene zimadzutsa mwadala maganizo oipa kapena zimene zimachititsa kuti munthu aseŵeretse maliseche pofuna kudzisangalatsa n’zodetsa pamaso pa Yehova. Ndipo zingachititse munthu kuswa kwambiri mfundo za makhalidwe abwino za Mulungu. Mwachitsanzo, mnyamata ndi mtsikana wina anali pachibwenzi ndipo ankakhala motalikirana kwambiri. Poyamba, ankaimbirana mafoni pafupipafupi kuti adziŵane bwino. Koma pasanapite nthaŵi yaitali, anayamba kumakambirana nkhani zosayenera. Nkhani zawozo zinayamba kukhala zolaula kwambiri. N’zosadabwitsa kuti kenako atakumana, sipanatenge nthaŵi kuti achite khalidwe loipa.

Inde, ife amene timafuna kukondweretsa Mulungu tidzachita zonse zimene tingathe kuti tipeŵe kugwera mumsampha wa kugonana kwa pa telefoni. Kodi tingakwanitse bwanji kuchita zimenezo?

‘Pumphunthani Thupi Lanu’

Kugonana kwa pa telefoni kukhoza kukhala chizoloŵezi chovuta kuchisiya. Tifunika ‘kupumphuntha thupi ndi kuliyesa kapolo’ kuti Yehova atiyanje. (1 Akorinto 9:27) Ngati panopa mumakonda kugonana kwa pa telefoni, bwanji osapeza thandizo? Kuuza makolo anu achikristu kungakhale poyambira pabwino. N’zoona kuti angakukwiyireni. Koma iwo angakhalenso anthu amene angakuthandizeni bwino kwambiri poonetsetsa khalidwe lanu kuti musabwerezenso zimenezo. Akulu mumpingo wa Mboni za Yehova wa kwanuko ndi okonzeka kukuthandizani ndipo angathe kuterodi.

Ngati muli pachibwenzi, tsimikizani mtima kukhala woyera, ngakhale pamene mukulankhulana pa telefoni. Mtsikana wina wachikristu yemwe ali pachibwenzi dzina lake Leticia, anati: “Ine ndi bwenzi langa taŵerengera limodzi nkhani zofotokoza mfundo za m’Baibulo pankhani yokhala oyera. Tikuyamikira kwambiri mmene nkhani zimenezi zatithandizira kukhalabe ndi chikumbumtima chabwino.” Khalani wolimba mtima kusintha nkhani imene mukukambirana ngati mukuona kuti ikupita koipa. Kambiranani kufunika koti nkhani zanu zizikhala zoyera.

M’mayiko ena, amalengeza malonda okhudza kugonana kwa pa telefoni pa TV usiku kwambiri. Mwina zingakhale bwino kuti musamaonere TV usiku kwambiri. Popeza mofanana ndi kugonana kwa pa telefoni, kuseŵeretsa maliseche pofuna kudzisangalatsa kumadzutsa maganizo oipa m’malo mowafetsa, n’kofunika kwambiri kupeŵa khalidwe lodetsa limeneli. * Mungakwanitse kuchotsa maganizo oipa mwa kuganizira zinthu zabwino. (Afilipi 4:8) Muzicheza ndi anthu amene amalankhula zabwino, ndiponso muziŵerenga Mawu a Mulungu ndi mabuku achikristu tsiku lililonse kuti mukhale olimba popeŵa zimenezi. Mwa kuchita zimenezi sipadzakhala mpata woganizira zinthu zoipa zimene zingawononge maganizo anu. Koposa zonse, pempherani kwa Mulungu kuti akuthandizeni. Mtumwi Petro analemba kuti: ‘Tayani pa Iye nkhaŵa yanu yonse pakuti Iye asamalira inu.’—1 Petro 5:6, 7.

Mtsikana wina wachikristu wa ku Brazil anati: “Pali zinthu zambiri zimene zingachititse achinyamata kugonana mosayenera.” Komabe, Yehova akudziŵa mavuto amene mumakumana nawo. Dziŵani kuti adzakuthandizani pa zonse zimene mukufunikira kuti mukhalebe woyera pamaso pake.—Aefeso 6:14-18.

[Mawu a M’munsi]

[Zithunzi pamasamba 20, 21]

Anthu ochuluka akukonda kwambiri kugonana kwa pa telefoni ndi kwa pa Intaneti

[Zithunzi pamasamba 20, 21]

Anthu amene ali pachibwenzi ayenera kusamala kuti nkhani zawo zisakhale zodetsa

[Chithunzi patsamba 22]

Kuŵerenga Mawu a Mulungu ndi mabuku achikristu kungakuthandizeni kuti mulimbikire kukhala oyera