Kodi Ndingapewe Bwanji Zogonana Kusukulu?
Zimene Achinyamata Amadzifunsa
Kodi Ndingapewe Bwanji Zogonana Kusukulu?
“Tsiku lililonse, ana a sukulu amakambirana zogonana. Atsikana mpaka amafunsira anyamata, ndipo amagonana kusukulu komweko.”—Anatero Eileen, wa zaka 16.
“Kusukulu kwathu, anyamata ogonana ndi anyamata anzawo amachita zachiwerewere ana a sukulu anzawo akuwaona, ndipo saona ngati pali cholakwika chilichonse.”—Anatero Michael, wa zaka 15. *
KODI anthu a m’kalasi mwanu amangokhalira kulankhula zogonana? Kodi ena samangolekezera pa kulankhula chabe koma mpaka amagonanadi? Ngati amatero, mwina mumamva ngati mmene anamvera wachinyamata wina amene anati kukhala kusukulu kuli ngati “kugwira ntchito pamalo pamene akupangira filimu yolaula.” Zoona zake n’zakuti, kusukulu, achinyamata ambiri nthawi zambiri amapeza mpata wolankhula zogonana kapenanso wogonana kumene.
Mwina mungamve anthu a m’kalasi mwanu akunena za kugonana mwachisawawa, kutanthauza kugonana ndi munthu amene alibe cholinga chilichonse chodziwana naye kapena kukhala naye pachibwenzi. Nthawi zina ana a sukulu amagonana mwachisawawa ndi munthu amene akungomudziwa pang’ono chabe. Nthawi zina amagonana ndi munthu amene sakumudziwa n’komwe amene analankhula naye pa Intaneti. Pa zochitika zonse ziwirizi, cholinga chogonana mwachisawawa n’choti asalowetsepo nkhani ya chikondi. Danielle, wa zaka 19 anati: “Sizitanthauza chilichonse, kupatulapo kuti anthu awiri akufuna kukhutiritsa chilakolako chawo basi.”
N’zosadabwitsa kuti nkhani yogonana mwachisawawa yafala m’masukulu ambiri. Mtsikana wina wa zaka 17 analemba m’nyuzipepala ya kusukulu kwawo kuti: “Kumayambiriro a mlungu uliwonse, m’tinjira ta m’makalasi anthu amangokhalira kukamba nkhani zokhudza munthu amene agonana naye posachedwapa mwachisawawa, ndipo amachita kufotokozerana mwatsatanetsatane zonse zomwe anachita.”
Ngati mukuyesetsa kutsatira mfundo za m’Baibulo, kukhala pakati pa anthu amene amangofuna kukamba zogonana kungakuchititseni kumva kuti mukumanidwa zinazake. Ndipo ngati simuchita nawo zomwe aliyense akuchita, angayambe kukunyogodolani mosavuta. Tiyenera kuyembekezera zimenezi kuchitika nthawi ndi nthawi, chifukwa Baibulo limati anthu ena akamapanda kumvetsa zochita zanu, akhoza kuyamba ‘kukuchitirani mwano.’ (1 Petro 4:3, 4) Komabe, palibe amene amakonda kusekedwa. Choncho, kodi mungatani kuti musamakambe nawo nkhani zogonana komanso musamagonane kusukulu, kwinakunso n’kumanyadira zochita zanu? Choyamba, m’pofunika kumvetsa chifukwa chake chiyeso chofuna kugonana chimakhala chachikulu kwambiri.
Dzidziweni Bwino
Panthawi yaunyamata, thupi lanu ndiponso maganizo anu zimasintha kwambiri. Panthawi imeneyi, mumakhala ndi chilakolako chachikulu chogonana. Dziwani kuti chimenechi n’chibadwa. Choncho ngati mumakhala ndi chilakolako chofuna kugonana ndi anthu ena kusukulu kwanu, musaganize kuti ndinu munthu woipa kwambiri kapena kuti simungathe kudzisunga. Mukhoza kudzisunga ngati mukufuna!
Kuphatikiza pa chilakolako chimene chimabwera chifukwa cha unyamata, palinso chinthu china chimene muyenera kudziwa. Popeza ndife opanda ungwiro, anthu onse amafuna kuchita zoipa. Ngakhale mtumwi Paulo anavomereza kuti: “Ndiona lamulo lina m’ziwalo zanga, lilikulimbana ndi lamulo la mtima wanga, ndi kundigonjetsa kapolo wa lamulo la m’ziwalo zanga.” Paulo anati kupanda ungwiro kwakeko kunamupangitsa kumva kuti anali “munthu wosauka,” kapena kuti womvetsa chisoni. (Aroma 7:23, 24) Koma iye anapambana nkhondo imeneyi, ndipo nanunso mungathe kutero!
Amvetsetseni Anthu a M’kalasi Mwanu
Monga tanenera kale, anthu a m’kalasi mwanu akhoza kumalankhula zogonana nthawi zonse kapena kumadzitamandira chifukwa cha anthu amene agonana nawo. Muyenera kudziwa kuti akhoza kukuwonongerani khalidwe lanu labwino. (1 Akorinto 15:33) Koma simuyenera kuwaona anthu a m’kalasi mwanu ngati adani anu. Chifukwa chiyani?
Anthu a m’kalasi mwanu ali ndi zilakolako zofanana ndi zanu. Nawonso mwachibadwa amakhala ndi mtima wofuna kuchita zoipa. Koma mosiyana ndi inu, ena a iwo ndi “okonda zokondweretsa munthu, osati okonda Mulungu.” Kapena mwina akuchokera kumabanja kumene anthu ake ali “opanda chikondi chachibadwidwe.” (2 Timoteo 3:1-4) Ena mwa anthu a m’kalasi mwanu akhoza kukhala oti sapatsidwa chilango mwachikondi ndiponso sapatsidwa malangizo a makhalidwe abwino amene makolo achikondi amapereka.—Aefeso 6:4.
Posowa nzeru zapamwamba zimene inu muli nazo pafupi, zomwe ndi Mawu a Mulungu, Baibulo, anthu a m’kalasi mwanu mwina sangadziwe zoipa zimene zimabwera chifukwa chogonjera chilakolako chawo mosadziletsa. (Aroma 1:26, 27) Zili ngati kuti makolo awo awapatsa galimoto yothamanga kwambiri ndipo awatuma ku msewu wodutsa magalimoto ambiri, koma sanawaphunzitse kuyendetsa galimotoyo. Mwina poyendetsa galimotoyo akhoza kusangalala kwambiri kwakanthawi, koma pamapeto pake angaone tsoka. Choncho kodi mungatani ngati anthu a m’kalasi mwanu ayamba kulankhula zogonana inu muli pomwepo kapena ngati akukunyengererani kuti muzichita nawo khalidwe lawo lachiwerewerelo?
Kanani Nkhani Zonyansa
Ngati anthu a m’kalasi mwanu ayamba kulankhula zachiwerewere, mwina mungakopeke kuti muzimvetsera, kapenanso kuthirirapo ndemanga, kuti musaonekere kuti ndinu wosiyana nawo. Koma tangoganizirani za uthenga umene mungakhale mukuwapatsa. Kodi kuchita chidwi ndi nkhani yawoyo kungasonyezedi mtundu wa munthu amene inu muli kapena amene mukufuna kukhala?
Choncho, kodi muyenera kutani mukapezeka kuti muli pamalo pamene ayamba kukamba nkhani yachiwerewere? Kodi muyenera kungonyamuka n’kuchokapo? Inde! (Aefeso 5:3, 4) Baibulo limati: “Wochenjera aona zoipa, nabisala.” (Miyambo 22:3) Choncho ngati muchoka pamene akukamba nkhani yachiwerewerepo, sikuti mukuchita mwano, koma mukuchenjera.
Ndipotu, simuyenera kuchita manyazi chifukwa chochoka pamalo pamene akukambapo nkhani yachiwerewere. Ndithudi pali nkhani zina zimene mukhoza kuchokapo popanda kuchita manyazi, makamaka ngati mulibe
chidwi ndi zimene akukambiranazo kapena simukufuna kuchita nawo zimene akunenazo. Mwachitsanzo, tiyerekezere kuti anthu angapo a m’kalasi mwanu ayamba kukambirana zokaba kwinakwake ndi mfuti. Kodi mungakhale pomwepo n’kumamvetsera mapulani awowo? Ngati mutatero, angakuoneni kuti muli nawo gulu limodzi. Choncho mwanzeru, mukhoza kuchokapo. Muzichita zomwezo ngati anthu ayamba kukamba nkhani yachiwerewere. Nthawi zambiri mukhoza kupeza njira yochokerapo popanda kuoneka ngati ndinu wonyada komanso popanda kuwachititsa anthu enawo kukunyozani.N’zoona kuti nthawi zina zingakhale zovuta kuchoka pamalo penapake. Mwachitsanzo, anthu amene anaikidwa kuti azikhala pafupi nanu m’kalasi mwina angafune kuti muziyankhira nawo nkhani zogonana. Ngati ndi choncho, mukhoza kuwauza mwamphamvu koma mwaulemu kuti asiye kukusokonezani. Ngati zimenezi sizikuthandiza, mukhoza kuchita zimene Brenda anachita. Iye anati: “Ndinapempha aphunzitsi mwachinsinsi kuti andiike pampando wina m’kalasimo.”
Chitani Zinthu Mwanzeru
Pasanapite nthawi yaitali, anthu ena a m’kalasi mwanu adzakufunsani kuti n’chifukwa chiyani simukamba nawo nkhani zawo zonyansazo. Ngati akufunsa za makhalidwe anu, muyenera kuyankha mwanzeru. N’zoona kuti ena angakufunseni pongofuna kuti akunyozeni osati kuti akumvetseni. Koma ngati munthu amene akukufunsaniyo akuoneka ngati akufunadi kudziwa zoona, lankhulani monyadira za zikhulupiriro zanu. Achinyamata ambiri agwiritsira ntchito buku lakuti Mafunso Achichepere Akufunsa—Mayankho Amene Amathandiza kuti athandize anthu a m’kalasi mwawo kumvetsa phindu lotsatira mfundo za m’Baibulo. *
Tsimikizani Mtima
Kodi muyenera kutani ngati mwana wa sukulu mnzanu walimba mtima mpaka kufuna kukukhudzani kapena kukupsompsonani? Ngati mumuloleza munthuyo kuchita zimenezi, mungamulimbikitse kuti apitirize kuchita zinthu zolakwazi. Baibulo limanena za mnyamata amene analolera kuti mkazi wachiwerewere amugwire ndi kum’psompsona. Anamulola kuti amulankhule momukopa. Zotsatirapo zake zinali zotani? “Mnyamatayo am’tsata posachedwa, monga ng’ombe ipita kukaphedwa.”—Miyambo 7:13-23.
Mosiyana ndi zimenezi, taonani zomwe Yosefe anachita pa zochitika ngati zomwezo. Mkazi wa bwana wake anayesera kumukopa kambirimbiri, koma iye anakana kwamtuwagalu. Pamene anayesa kumugwira, iye anachitapo kanthu mwamsanga ndipo anathawa.—Genesis 39:7-12.
Mofanana ndi Yosefe, mungafunike kuchitapo kanthu mwamphamvu ngati munthu wa m’kalasi mwanu kapena wachinansi wina ayesera kukukhudzani mosayenerera. Eileen anati: “Ngati mnyamata ayesera kundikhudza, ndimamuuza kuti asiye. Ngati sakumva, ndimakuwa n’kumuuza kuti asayerekeze dala kundikhudza.” Ponena za anyamata a kusukulu kwawo, Eileen anati: “Sangakulemekezeni pokhapokha ngati inuyo muwachititsa kuti azikulemekezani.”
Nanunso anthu a m’kalasi mwanu adzakulemekezani ngati mukana kulankhula zachiwerewere, ngati mufotokoza mwaulemu makhalidwe anu abwino pamene pali pofunika kutero, ndiponso ngati mukana kwamtuwagalu kuchita nawo zachiwerewere. Phindu lina n’loti mudzamva bwino mumtima. Ndipo chofunika kuposa zonse, Yehova adzasangalala nanu!—Miyambo 27:11.
[Mawu a M’munsi]
^ ndime 4 Mayina ena tawasintha.
^ ndime 22 Lofalitsidwa ndi Mboni za Yehova.
ZOTI MUGANIZIRE
▪ Kodi munganene chiyani kuti muchoke pamalo pamene anthu akulankhula zachiwerewere?
▪ Kodi mudzanena ndi kuchita chiyani munthu wa m’kalasi mwanu akadzafuna kuchita nanu zachiwerewere?
[Chithunzi patsamba 27]
Ngati anthu ayamba kulankhula zachiwerewere, ingochokanipo
[Chithunzi patsamba 28]
Kanani zachiwerewere kwamtuwagalu