Mmene Mungapezere Chikondi Chenicheni

Kodi mungatani kuti anthu azikukondani kwambiri, osati ndi chikondi cha pakati pa mwamuna ndi mkazi chabe? Kodi kulemera kungakuthandizeni? Kapena kodi muyenera kukonza maonekedwe anu kuti mukhale wokongola?

AMUNA ndi akazi omwe, nthawi zambiri amaganiza kuti zimenezi zingawathandize. Amanyengedwa ndi zonena za otsatsa malonda ndiponso amatsanzira za m’manyuzipepala, m’mawailesi ndi za pa TV. N’zoona kuti palibe cholakwika chilichonse n’kudzisamalira kuti tizioneka bwino, ndipo kuchita zimenezi n’koyenera. Koma kukongola, kumene nthawi zambiri sikukhalitsa, sikubweretsa chikondi chosatha. Chumanso sichithandiza. Chimene chimathandiza ndi kusonyeza ena chikondi chenicheni. Yesu anaphunzitsa kuti: “Patsani, ndipo kudzapatsidwa kwa inu.” (Luka 6:38) Mwachidule tingati, ngati mukufuna kuti anthu azikukondani, yambani inuyo kuwakonda.

Kodi tingachite bwanji zimenezi? Polemba kalata motsogozedwa ndi mzimu woyera wa Mulungu, mtumwi Paulo anayankha funso limenelo. Iye anasonyeza kuti chikondi chimafuna khama, ndiponso kuti sichingotsatira mmene munthu akumvera mu mtima. M’malo mwake iye anasonyeza kuti chikondi mungachidziwe poona makamaka zimene munthu amachitira anthu ena ndiponso zimene amapewa kuwachitira. Taonani zimene analemba Paulo: “Chikondi chikhala chilezere, chili chokoma mtima; chikondi sichidukidwa; chikondi sichidziwa kudzitamanda, sichidzikuza, sichichita zosayenera, sichitsata za mwini yekha, sichipsa mtima, sichilingirira zoipa; sichikondwera ndi chinyengo, koma chikondwera ndi choonadi; chikwirira zinthu zonse, chikhulupirira zinthu zonse, chiyembekeza zinthu zonse, chipirira zinthu zonse.”—1 Akorinto 13:4-7.

Kodi mumamva bwanji ngati munthu wina akukukomerani mtima kapena ngati amakukondanibe ngakhale kuti mumachita kapena kunena zinthu zina zing’onozing’ono zosasangalatsa? Kodi simukopeka ndi munthu amene amakuderanidi nkhawa, amene sakwiya msanga, amene amakhululuka ndiponso amachita chilungamo ngakhale panthawi imene kukhululuka ndi kuchita chilungamoko kuli kovuta?

Choncho nanunso muzichita zomwezo kwa ena. Yesu anati: “Chifukwa chake zinthu zilizonse mukafuna kuti anthu achitire inu, inunso muwachitire iwo zotero.” (Mateyu 7:12) Kukonda anthu ena nthawi zina kumakhala kovuta, koma mukachita khama mumapindula. Phindu limodzi n’loti muzikondedwa kwambiri ndi anthu a m’banja mwanu, anzanu, mwamuna wanu kapena mkazi wanu, kapena munthu amene mukufuna  kumanga naye banja. Komanso, mudzakhala wosangalala chifukwa chodziwa kuti mukuchita zinthu zoyenera, ndiponso mukudzipereka kuthandiza ena. Zoonadi, “kupatsa kutidalitsa koposa kulandira.”—Machitidwe 20:35.

Phunzirani Chikondi Kuchokera kwa Amene Amachidziwa Bwino Kwambiri

Yehova ndi Mulungu wachikondi, ndipo ndi amene amachidziwa bwino chikondi kuposa wina aliyense. (1 Yohane 4:8) Chikondi chake chimamuchititsa kuphunzitsa onse amene akufuna kuphunzira khalidwe limeneli. Taganizirani zitsanzo zingapo za mfundo za m’Baibulo zimene zimatithandiza kukonda ena ndi kukhala okondedwa.

‘Khalani wotchera khutu, wodekha polankhula.’ (Yakobo 1:19) Atachita kafukufuku m’mabanja oposa 20,000, anapeza kuti anthu amene anakwatirana ndi munthu amene amamvetsera bwino ndi amene anali achimwemwe kwambiri. Kulankhulana bwino n’kofunika kwambiri pakati pa mwamuna ndi mkazi. Pulofesa wina wodziwa za khalidwe la anthu analemba kuti: “Ngati mwamuna kapena mkazi wanu sadziwa zomwe mumakumana nazo pamoyo wanu, mudzakhala wosasangalala. Ndipo choipa kuposa pamenepa n’kukhala ndi munthu amene akudziwa zomwe mukukumana nazo koma sakumvetsa kuti n’chifukwa chiyani zimenezi mukuchita kudandaula nazo kwambiri.” Iye anawonjezera kuti ngakhale ngati anthu awiri atakhala osiyana m’njira zinazake, “ngati mwamuna kapena mkazi wanu amamvetsa mmene inuyo mumaonera zinthu ndiponso zimene zikukuchitikirani pamoyo wanu ndi mmene zimenezi zimakukhudzirani, kusiyanako sikukhala nkhani yaikulu.”

“Mupsinjika mumtima mwanu. . . . Mukulitsidwe inunso” m’chikondi chanu. (2 Akorinto 6:12, 13) Timapindula tikamakonda anthu osiyanasiyana. Buku linalake lolembedwa ku Harvard Medical School linati: “Kafukufuku wosiyanasiyana wasonyeza kuti anthu amene amagwirizana ndi anthu a m’banja mwawo, anzawo, ndi anthu a ku dera kwawo, amakhala osangalala, sadwaladwala, ndipo amakhala moyo wautali.”

“Tifulumizane ku chikondano ndi ntchito zabwino.” (Ahebri 10:24, 25) Anthufe timatengera zochita za anzathu. Mukamakhala nthawi yaitali ndi anthu amene amasonyeza chikondi chenicheni chachikristu, mudzaona panokha mmene chikondi chenicheni chimakhalira ndipo mudzaphunzira mmene mungachisonyezere pamoyo wanu. Mboni za Yehova zimayesetsa kusonyeza chikondi choterocho pakati pawo, podziwa kuti ndi chizindikiro cha ophunzira oona a Yesu. (Yohane 13:35) Zidzakhala zosangalala kukulandirani ku misonkhano yawo yachikristu.

Ngati mukuona kuti simukondedwa, musalefuke kapena kudziimba mlandu. Kumbukirani kuti Yehova akuona zimene zikukuchitikirani. Kodi mukukumbukira Leya, amene tinamutchula mu nkhani yoyambirira uja? Yehova anaona zomwe zinkamuchitikira, ndipo Leya anabereka ana aamuna sikisi ndi mwana wamkazi mmodzi. Limeneli linali dalitso lalikulu pa nthawi imeneyo, chifukwa ana ankaonedwa kuti ndi amtengo wapatali kwambiri kukhala nawo. Kuwonjezera apo, ana onse aamuna a Leya anakhala atate a mafuko mu Israyeli. (Genesis 29:30-35; 30:16-21) Chidwi chimene Mulungu anasonyeza Leya mwachikondi chiyenera kuti chinamulimbikitsa kwambiri.

M’dziko latsopano limene Malemba akulonjeza, palibe amene azidzamva kuti sakondedwa. M’malo mwake, pakati pa anthu kulikonse padzakhala chikondi chenicheni. (Yesaya 11:9; 1 Yohane 4:7-12) Choncho, tiyeni tisonyeze kuti tikufuna kudzakhala m’dziko limenelo, mwa kuyamba panopa kukhala ndi chikondi chimene chimaphunzitsidwa m’Baibulo ndi chimene Mlembi wa Baibulolo wasonyeza. Zoonadi, chimwemwe chenicheni chimabwera, osati kokha tikamakondedwa, koma tikamasonyeza ena chikondi chenicheni.—Mateyu 5:46-48; 1 Petro 1:22.

[Mawu Otsindika patsamba 8]

“Kupatsa kutidalitsa koposa kulandira.”—Machitidwe 20:35

[Chithunzi patsamba 8]

Ngati mukufuna kuti anthu azikukondani, yambani inuyo kuwakonda