Chimene Chinandichititsa Kusiya Kukonda Nkhondo

Yosimbidwa ndi Thomas Stubenvoll

NDINABADWA pa November 8, 1944, mumzinda wa New York. Ndinakulira m’dera la South Bronx panthawi imene m’derali munali anthu amitundu yosiyanasiyana ndipo mtundu uliwonse unkakhala m’chigawo chakechake. Ndili mnyamata ndinkakonda kuyendayenda m’misewu ndipo pasanapite nthawi ndinazindikira kuti sindiyenera kulowa m’zigawo za anthu a mitundu ina poopa zigawenga za kumeneko. Anthu ankaopa zigawengazo chifukwa zinkachita zinthu zambiri zachiwawa.

Ndisanakwanitse zaka 12, ndinali nditalowa m’gulu linalake la zigawenga. Ine ndi anzanga tinkalowa mu sitima n’kumaba makatoni a zakudya ndi zinthu zina. Magulu a zigawenga omwe anali ndi achinyamata a zaka 17 mpaka 19 anali achiwawa kwambiri. Nthawi zambiri maguluwa akakumana pankakhala ndewu ya mtima bii. Panthawi ina mnzanga wapamtima anabayidwa ndi mpeni mpaka kufa ine ndikuona.

Ndinayamba Kukonda Nkhondo

Ngakhale kuti ndinali m’gulu la zigawenga, ndinkaonabe kuti sindinafike pamene ndimafuna ndipo ndinaona kuti ndi bwino kungosamuka m’derali. Ndinali ndi amalume anga, a Eddie, amene anali msilikali wapamadzi wa dziko la United States ndipo anakamenya nawo nkhondo ya ku Korea. Iwo atandifotokozera zimene asilikali apamadzi amachita, ndinasirira kwambiri. Anandiuza kuti msilikali aliyense wapamadzi amakhala wosunga mwambo ndiponso wolimba mtima, ndipo amaphunzitsidwa kuchita zinthu mwachangu. Asilikaliwo ankatsatira mfundo yakuti Semper fidelis, kutanthauza “kukhala wokhulupirika nthawi zonse.” Mfundoyi inkawalimbikitsa kukhala okhulupirika ndi odzipereka. Pasanapite nthawi ndinayamba kulakalaka kwambiri kukhala msilikali wapamadzi.

Pa November 8, 1961, nditangokwanitsa zaka 17, ndinayamba maphunziro a usilikali wapamadzi. Ndinamaliza  maphunzirowa miyezi inayi isanathe. Chimenechi chinali chiyambi cha ntchito yanga ya usilikali wapamadzi yomwe ndinaigwira kwa zaka 11.

Nthawi imene ndinkayamba usilikali n’kuti dziko lathu lisali pa nkhondo. Komabe, popeza kuti maphunziro a usilikali samatha, ananditumiza ku Oahu, Hawaii, kumene ndinakaphunzira nkhondo yapamtunda komanso yobisalira. Ndinali ndi luso lowombera zinthu mosaphonya, moti ndinkatha kuwombera kanthu kakang’ono ngati ndalama yachitsulo ndili pa mtunda wa mamita 457. Ndinaphunziranso kumenya ndewu yamanja, kuponya mabomba, kugwiritsa ntchito mapu, kugwetsa nyumba ndiponso kugwiritsa ntchito zipangizo zolankhulirana. Chilichonse chimene ndinkachita chinkandisangalatsa.

Nditachoka ku Hawaii, ananditumiza ku Japan komwe ndinatha miyezi 6 ndikugwira ntchito yolondera zida pabwalo la ndege zankhondo lotchedwa Atsugi. Pasanapite nthawi yaitali, nkhondo ya pakati pa dziko la United States ndi North Vietnam inafika poipa, ndipo ineyo pamodzi ndi asilikali ena tinatumizidwa ku North Vietnam, pa sitima yonyamula ndege zankhondo yotchedwa USS Ranger ndipo tinakafikira kugombe la Tonkin. Kuchokera pagombe limeneli, ndege zimene sitima yathu inanyamula zinkakaponya nawo mabomba ku North Vietnam. Panthawiyi ndinaona kuti ndikumenya nkhondo yeniyeni. Komabe, popeza kuti ndinkangogwira ntchito mu sitima, ndinkasirira kukamenya nawo nkhondo kumalo enieni kumene kumachitikira nkhondoko.

Nkhondo Inafika Povuta Kwambiri

Mu 1966, nditagwira ntchito ya usilikali mu sitima yapamadzi kwa zaka zinayi, ndinapatsidwa mwayi woti nditha kupuma pantchitoyi. Anzanga ambiri akanapatsidwa mwayi umenewu, mwina akanasankha kubwerera kunyumba n’cholinga choti apewe nkhondo imene imaoneka kuti ifika povuta kwambiri. Koma ineyo ndinkakonda kwambiri ntchito ya usilikali moti sindinkafuna kusiya. Choncho, ndinapempha kuti ndipitirize.

Ndinkangofuna kumenya nawo nkhondo basi, chifukwa zimenezi ndi zimene ndinaphunzitsidwa. Choncho, ndinadzipereka kuti ndikhale m’gulu la asilikali oyenda pansi. Ndinalibe nazo ntchito kuti anditumiza kuti chifukwa chimene ndinkafuna n’kupitiriza usilikali basi. Ndinkafunitsitsa kukhala katswiri ndipo nkhondo inali ngati mulungu wanga.

Mu October 1967, ananditumiza ku Vietnam. Ndidakali ndi mantha komanso chisangalalo, ananditumiza m’chigawo cha Quang Tri, komwe kunkamenyedwera nkhondoyo. Ndisanathe ndi tsiku limodzi lomwe, ndinapezeka ndikumenya nkhondo yoopsa kwambiri. Anthu ambiri ankafa komanso kuvulala modetsa nkhawa ine ndikuona. Ndinkaona fumbi la zipolopolo za adani lili koboo. Pamalowa panalibe tchire lambiri loti n’kubisalapo. Zinthu zinafika povuta kwambiri moti ndinkangowombera paliponse. Ndinkaona kuti ndifa basi. Koma kenako kumenyanako kunatha ndipo ndinapulumuka. Komabe n’zomvetsa chisoni kuti anzanga ambiri anafa.

M’miyezi 20 yotsatira, nkhondo ya ku Vietnam inafika povuta kwambiri kuposa m’mbuyo monsemo. Tsiku lililonse, usana ndi usiku, ndinkakhalira kuwombera kapena kuzinda zipolopolo, kubisalira adani kapena iwo kundibisalira. Nthawi zambiri ndinkawomberana ndi adani ndili m’mayenje koma kukagwa mvula m’mayenjemo munkadzaza madzi. Nthawi zina munkazizira kwambiri ndipo zinali zovuta kupirira. Ndinkadya ndiponso kugona m’mayenje momwemo.

Nthawi zambiri ndinkakhala m’thengo, kufufuza adani n’kumawapha, ndipo zinali zoopsa chifukwa nawonso akanatha kundipha. Nthawi zina, ndinkapezeka kuti ndili pakati pa mabomba amene ankaphulika motsatizana kwa maola ambiri. Tsiku lina tikumenya nkhondo pafupi ndi ku Khe Sanh, anthu ambiri a m’gulu lathu anaphedwa ndipo ena anavulala. Amene tinapulumuka osavulala tinalipo 13 okha.

Pa January 30, 1968, ndinali kumalo ena a asilikali komwe ndinagona mu tenti. Apa n’kuti nditatha nthawi yoposa chaka chimodzi ndikugona m’thengo. Koma ufuluwu unali wosakhalitsa chifukwa  m’bandakucha wa tsiku limeneli ndinadzidzimuka nditamva phokoso lalikulu la bomba limene linaphulika pamalowa. Ndinavulala chifukwa tizitsulo ta bombali tinalowa n’kundikanirira m’mapewa ndi kumsana. Apa adani anali atatsimikiza zolanda derali.

Chifukwa cha kuvulalaku, ndinapatsidwa mendulo ya ulemu imene amapereka kwa asilikali ovulala pankhondo. Koma ndinkaona kuti sindinavulale kwambiri moti n’kusiya kumenya nkhondo. Madokotala anandichotsa msangamsanga tizitsulo tija ndipo pasanapite nthawi ndinapita mu mzinda wa Hue komwe nkhondo inavutanso kwambiri. Kumeneku ndinapha anthu ambirimbiri. Kupha adani siinali nkhani kwa ine. Kwa masiku 32, ndinkayenda nyumba ndi nyumba kufufuza adani ndi kuwapha.

Panthawiyi ndinkaona kuti kupha adani sikulakwa ngakhale pang’ono. Mumtima ndinkanena kuti, ‘Ndikuchita bwino kwambiri chifukwa chakuti adaniwa anapha anthu ambirimbiri osalakwa mu mzinda wa Hue. M’misewu ndi m’tinjira munali mitembo yokhayokha. Ankatchera mabomba paliponse, ndipo mabomba ena ankawatchera pansi pa mitembo. Nthawi zonse tinkafunika kukhala osamala chifukwa adani ankatibisalira.’ Zimenezi sizinandichititse kuti ndisiye kukonda nkhondo, chifukwa ndinkaona kuti kupha adani ndi chinthu chofunika kwambiri.

Ndinkakonda Nkhondo Mopitirira Malire

Patapita nthawi asilikali atasiya kumenyana ku Hue, ndinamaliza ntchito imene ndinapatsidwa. Apa n’kuti nditatha miyezi 13. Koma nkhondo inali ikupitirira, ndipo sindinkafuna kuisiya. Choncho, ndinadzipereka kuti ndipitirize kukhala ku Vietnam. Panthawiyi ndinkayang’anira gulu la asilikali ndipo tinatumizidwa dera lina. Ntchito yanga inkaphatikizapo kutsogolera timagulu ting’onoting’ono ta asilikali timene tinkatumizidwa m’midzi. Kumeneko tinkacheza ndi anthu wamba ndiponso kuwaphunzitsa mmene angatetezere midzi yawo. Nthawi zonse tinkafunika kukhala osamala chifukwa adani ankatha kudzibisa n’kumaoneka ngati anthu wamba. Usiku tinkayenda mwakachetechete kupita kukagwira ndi kupha adani. Ngakhale kuti zinali zitafika poipa, chidwi changa pa nkhondo chinkawonjezereka.

Nthawi yomwe ndinapatsidwa kuti ndikhale ku Vietnam kachiwiri inatha mofulumira. Panthawiyi ndinapemphanso kuti ndipitirize. Koma akuluakulu anakana, mwina chifukwa chakuti anaona kuti ndinkakonda nkhondo mopitirira malire. Komabe sindinasiye usilikali. Anandiuza kuti ndibwerere ku United States kuti ndizikaphunzitsa asilikali atsopano. Ndinagwira ntchitoyi kwa zaka zitatu ndi theka. Popeza kuti ndinkadziwa zinthu zambiri zokhudza usilikali, ndinkayesetsa kuphunzitsa msilikali aliyense kuti adzakhale wodziwa nkhondo kwambiri ngati ineyo.

Ndinapeza Chinthu Chofunika Kwambiri

Ndinayamba kugwirizana kwambiri ndi mnzanga wina yemwe ndinkagwira naye ntchito yophunzitsa asilikali. Popeza mkazi wake anali atamuthawa, mchemwali wake, dzina lake Christine Antisdel, anadzipereka kuti azikakhala naye n’cholinga choti amuthandize kulera ana ake awiri omwe anali aang’ono kwambiri. Mtsikanayi anali atangokhala kumene wa Mboni za Yehova ndipo aka kanali koyamba kuti ndimve za Mboni za Yehova.

Ndinakulira m’banja la Katolika ndiponso ndinaphunzira sukulu ya Katolika kwa zaka 8. Kutchalitchi ndinali mnyamata wothandiza wansembe pa mwambo wa Misa. Komabe palibe chimene ndinkadziwa chokhudza Baibulo. Koma Christine anandithandiza kwambiri. Anandiuza mfundo za m’Baibulo zomwe ndinali ndisanazimvepo ndipo ndinadziwa zimene Baibulo limaphunzitsa ndiponso zimene siliphunzitsa.

 Mwachitsanzo, ndinaphunzira kuti Baibulo silinena kuti anthu oipa akafa amakalangidwa ndi Mulungu kumoto. (Mlaliki 9:5, 10) Ndinaphunziranso kuti Baibulo silinena kuti pali Mulungu Mwana, Mulungu Atate ndiponso Mulungu mzimu woyera. (Yohane 14:28) Komanso ndinadziwa kuti Baibulo limanena kuti Mulungu adzawononga anthu oipa, imfa ndi mavuto zidzatha ndiponso anthu omvera adzakhala m’paradaiso padziko lapansi kosatha. (Salmo 37:9-11; Chivumbulutso 21:3, 4) Ndinadziwanso makhalidwe abwino amene Mulungu amafuna. (1 Akorinto 6:9, 10) Komanso ndinadziwa kuti dzina la Mulungu ndi Yehova. (Salmo 83:18) Ndinasangalala kwambiri kudziwa zinthu zimenezi.

Mu November 1972, ananditumiza kumalo ena kumene ndinkaphunzitsa kamenyedwe ka nkhondo asilikali amene anapatsidwa maudindo ang’onoang’ono. Ndili kumeneku ndinayamba kuphunzira Baibulo ndi Mboni za Yehova. Ndinkapitanso kumisonkhano yawo ndipo ndinkachita chidwi kwambiri chifukwa anali anthu ochezeka komanso ankakondana kwambiri.

Koma nditaphunzira zambiri za Baibulo, chikumbumtima changa chinayamba kundivutitsa kwambiri. Choonadi cha m’Baibulo chinkatsutsana kwambiri ndi zochita zanga. Ndinkakonda kwambiri nkhondo komanso chiwawa, moti ndinali wokonzeka kufera dziko langa, koma kenako ndinadziwa kuti zinthu zimenezi Mulungu amadana nazo.

Ndinayamba kuona kuti n’zosatheka kumagwira ntchito ya usilikali komanso kumalambira Yehova Mulungu. Apa m’pamene ndinasiya kukonda nkhondo. Choncho ndinaganiza zosiya ntchito ndipo nditapempha kuti ndisiye, anandipatsa mafomu oti ndisaine, kundifunsa mafunso ambirimbiri, ndiponso kundiyeza kuti aone ngati mutu wanga ukuyenda bwino. Patatha miyezi ingapo anandilola kusiya ntchito atatsimikizira kuti ndachita zimenezi chifukwa chakuti chikumbumtima changa sichikundilola kumenya nkhondo. Apa n’kuti nditagwira ntchito ya usilikali kwa zaka 11.

Tsopano ndinali wokonzeka kuuza Yehova mawu a pa Yesaya 6:8 akuti: “Ndine pano; munditumize ine.” Ndinali wokonzeka kugwira ntchito mwamphamvu ndiponso modzipereka potumikira Mulungu woona ngati mmene ndinkachitira ku usilikali. Ndinabatizidwa n’kukhala wa Mboni za Yehova pa July 27, 1973. Patatha miyezi isanu, ndinakwatirana ndi Christine Antisdel, mtsikana amene anali munthu woyamba wa Mboni za Yehova kukumana naye.

Ine ndi Christine tatha zaka 36 tili m’banja ndipo nthawi yonseyi takhala tikuthandiza anthu kudziwa Baibulo komanso kukhala paubwenzi ndi Mulungu. Kwa zaka 8 tinagwira ntchito ya umishonale m’dziko la Dominican Republic, ndipo zaka 18 zapitazi, ndakhala ndikugwira ntchito yoyendera ndi kulimbikitsa mipingo ya Mboni za Yehova. Ine ndi mkazi wanga takhala tikuyendera mipingo yambirimbiri ya anthu olankhula Chisipanishi m’dziko la United States.

Mpaka pano, palibe vuto lililonse limene ndili nalo lobwera chifukwa cha zimene ndinaona kunkhondo. Sindivutika maganizo, kubwebweta kapena kulota zinthu zoopsa zimene zinachitika kunkhondo. Komabe, nditadziwa zambiri zokhudza Yehova Mulungu, ndinayamba kudandaula chifukwa chakuti ndinapha anthu panthawi ya nkhondo.

Ndikusangalala kuti ndinasintha kwambiri moyo wanga. Panopa ndimaona kuti Mulungu anandikhululukira zonse zimene ndinachita m’mbuyomu. M’malo mopha anthu, panopa ndimathandiza anthu kuti adzakhale ndi moyo wosatha m’paradaiso padziko lapansi. Panthawi yomwe ndinali msilikali, ndinachita zinthu zambiri zoipa chifukwa chosazindikira komanso kuphunzitsidwa zolakwika. Chifukwa chokhala wa Mboni za Yehova, ndadziwa zambiri zimene Baibulo limaphunzitsa. Kudziwa kuti kuli Mulungu woona ndiponso wamoyo, kumandithandiza kuchita zinthu zoyenera pamoyo wanga. Ndimadziwa kuti iye amatikonda ndipo m’tsogolomu adzadalitsa anthu amene amamukonda ndi kumumvera.

[Mawu Otsindika patsamba 25]

Tsiku lililonse, usana ndi usiku, ndinkakhalira kuwombera kapena kuzinda zipolopolo, kubisalira adani kapena iwo kundibisalira

[Mawu Otsindika patsamba 27]

Nditadziwa zambiri zokhudza Yehova Mulungu, ndinayamba kudandaula chifukwa chakuti ndinapha anthu panthawi ya nkhondo

[Zithunzi patsamba 24]

Ndikugwira ntchito yophunzitsa asilikali (pamwamba) ndiponso ndili kunkhondo ku Vietnam (pansi)

[Chithunzi patsamba 25]

Nditavulala, ndinapatsidwa mendulo ya ulemu imene amapereka kwa asilikali ovulala pankhondo. Koma ndinkaona kuti sindinavulale kwambiri moti n’kusiya kumenya nkhondo

[Chithunzi patsamba 26]

Ine ndi Christine tatha zaka 36 tili m’banja ndipo nthawi yonseyi takhala tikuthandiza anthu kudziwa Baibulo