Luso Lomvetsera Ena Mwachikondi

“ZIKOMO kwambiri chifukwa chondimvetsera.” Kodi pali wina aliyense amene wakuuzani choncho posachedwapa? Zimenezo n’zonyaditsa kwambiri! Munthu yemwe amamvetsera kwambiri, pafupifupi wina aliyense amamuyamikira. Mwa kumvetsera mwachidwi, tingalimbikitse anthu opanikizika ndi otopa chifukwa cha mavuto omwe akumana nawo. Ndipo kodi kukhala womvetsera kwambiri sikungatithandize kuwakonda kwambiri anthu? Mumpingo wachikristu, kumvetsera mwachikondi ndi mbali yofunika kwambiri kuti ‘tiganizirane wina ndi mnzake ndi kufulumizana ku chikondano ndi ntchito zabwino.’​—Ahebri 10:24.

Komabe, anthu ambiri sadziwa kumvetsera. M’malo momvetsera zimene ena akufuna kunena, amakonda kupereka uphungu, kukamba za zomwe iwo anakumana nazo, kapena kunena za mmene iwo akuonera zinthuzo. N’zoonadi kuti kumvetsera ndi luso. Koma kodi tingaphunzire bwanji kumvetsera mwachikondi?

Chimene Chili Chofunika

Yehova ndi ‘Mlangizi wathu Wamkulu.’ (Yesaya 30:20) Akhoza kutiphunzitsa zambiri ponena za kumvetsera. Taganizirani mmene Yehova anathandizira mneneri Eliya. Atachita mantha ndi zimene Mfumukazi Yezebeli ananena, Eliya anathawira kuchipululu ndipo anapempha kuti afe. Ali komweko mngelo wa Mulungu anam’lankhula. Pamene mneneriyo amafotokoza zimene ankaopa, Yehova anamvetsera, ndipo Yehova anasonyeza mphamvu zake zoopsa. Kodi zotsatira zake zinali zotani? Eliya sanachitenso mantha ndipo anabwerera kuntchito yake. (1 Mafumu 19:2-15) N’chifukwa chiyani Yehova amamvetsera nkhawa za atumiki ake? Chifukwa chakuti iye amasamala za iwo. (1 Petro 5:7) Chimenechi ndi chinthu chofunika kwambiri chimene chingathandize munthu kudziwa kumvetsera. Ayenera kusamala za ena, ndiponso kuwadera nkhawa.

Mwamuna wina ku Bolivia atachita tchimo lalikulu, anayamikira pamene wokhulupirira mnzake anamumvetsera mwachidwi. Mwamunayo anati: “Imeneyo inali nthawi yovuta kwambiri pa moyo wanga. Pakadapanda mbaleyo kundimvetsera mwatcheru, ndikanatha kusiya kutumikira Yehova mosavuta. Mbaleyu sanalankhule zambiri, koma kungodziwa kokha kuti iye anandimvetsera mosamala, kunandilimbikitsa kwambiri. Sindinafune kuti andiuze chochita ayi. Ndinkadziwa chochita. Koma ndinkangofuna kudziwa ngati munthu wina akumvetsa maganizo anga. Kumvetsera kwa mbaleyu kunandithandiza kuti ndisataye mtima.”

Yesu Kristu ndi chitsanzo chachikulu pa luso lomvetsera mwachikondi. Iye atangomwalira kumene, ophunzira ake awiri amachokera ku Yerusalemu kupita ku mudzi wina womwe unali pa mtunda wokwana makilomita 11. Mosakayikira ophunzirawa anali atataya mtima. Choncho Yesu Kristu woukitsidwayo anayamba kuyenda nawo limodzi. Ndipo mosamala kwambiri amawafunsa mafunso kuti adziwe zomwe zinali mumtima mwawo, ndipo ophunzirawo amayankha. Analongosola za chikhulupiriro chomwe anali nacho, komanso za mmene anakhumudwira ndiponso za kuthedwa nzeru kwawo. Yesu anasamala za iwo, ndipo kumvetsera kwake mwachikondi kunakonzekeretsa ophunzira awiri aja kuti nawonso  amumvetsere. Kenako Yesu ‘anawatanthauzira iwo malembo onse zinthu za Iye yekha.’​—Luka 24:13-27.

Njira yachikondi yolimbikitsira ena kumvetsera tikamalankhula n’njoti tiziyamba ndi ifeyo kumvetsera. Mkazi wina wa ku Bolivia anati: “Makolo anga ndi apongozi anayamba kutsutsana ndi mmene ndimalerera ana anga. Ndinaipidwa ndi ndemanga zawo, komabe monga kholo ndinkadzikayikira. Ndiye tsiku lina, munthu wina wa Mboni za Yehova anafika pakhomo panga. Ndipo anandiuza za malonjezo a Mulungu. Komabe, n’taona kuti akundifunsa maganizo anga, ndinadziwa kuti munthuyu akufuna kundimvetsera. Ndinamulandira, ndipo ndinayamba kum’longosolera za mavuto anga. Anamvetsera modekha. Kenako anandifunsa kuti kodi ndimafuna kuti ana anga adzakhale otani akadzakula komanso mmene mwamuna wanga amaonera maganizo amenewo. Zinali zotsitsimula kukhala ndi munthu wofuna kundimvetsa. Pamene anayamba kundionetsa zimene Baibulo limanena pankhani ya moyo wabanja, ndinadziwa kuti ndikulankhula ndi munthu amene akufuna kundithandiza vuto langa.”

Baibulo limati: “Chikondi sichitsata za mwini yekha.” (1 Akorinto 13:4, 5) Choncho kumvetsera mwachikondi kumatanthauza kuti tisiye kaye zofuna zathu. Zimenezi zingatanthauze kuzimitsa TV, kuika nyuzipepala pansi, kapena kuzimitsa selo foni yathu pamene ena akutiuza za nkhani yofunika kwambiri. Kumvetsera mwachikondi kumatanthauza kukhala ndi chidwi chachikulu pa zimene mnzanuyo akunena. Kumafunanso kuti tipewe kulankhula za ifeyo, mwachitsanzo kunena kuti,“Zimenezo zangondikumbutsa zimene zinandichitikira nthawi ina yake.” Zolankhula ngati zimenezo zimafunika nthawi imene mukucheza, koma ngati wina akulongosola za vuto lalikulu, tiyenera kusiya kaye za ife eni. Pali njira inanso yosonyezera chidwi chenicheni kwa anthu ena.

Kumvetsera Kofuna Kuzindikira Mmene Zikumukhudzira

Anzake a mwamuna uja Yobu anamvetsera nkhani zosachepera 10 kuchokera kwa Yobu. Komabe, Yobu ananena kuti: “Ha! ndikadakhala naye wina wakundimvera.” (Yobu 31:35) N’chifukwa chiyani Yobu analankhula choncho? Chifukwa chakuti kumvetsera kwawo sikunali kotonthoza. Sanasamale za iye ndipo sanafune kumvetsa maganizo ake. N’zoona kuti iwo sizinawakhudze mtima ngati mmene zimakhalira ndi anthu achifundo. Koma mtumwi Petro anapereka uphungu wakuti: “Khalani nonse a mtima umodzi, ochitirana chifundo, okondana ndi abale, achisoni, odzichepetsa.” (1 Petro 3:8) Kodi tingasonyeze bwanji chifundo? Njira imodzi ndiyo kukhudzidwa ndi maganizo a wina ndi kuyesa kuwamvetsetsa. Kupereka ndemanga zotonthoza ndi njira imodzi yosonyezera kuti zikutikhudza. Mwachitsanzo tinganene kuti, “zimenezo n’zokhumudwitsadi,” kapena kuti “koma ndiye anakumva molakwikatu.” Njira ina ndiyo kulankhula zomwe munthu akutiuzazo m’mawu athuathu, ndipo zimenezi zimasonyeza kuti tikumvetsa zimene munthuyo akunena. Kumvetsera mwachikondi kumatanthauza kumva mosamala osati mawu okha ayi, koma ngakhalenso kuzindikira zimene munthuyo akuganiza ngakhale sanazilankhule.

Robert * ndi mtumiki wa nthawi zonse wa Mboni za Yehova amene wakhala akutumikira kwa nthawi yaitali. Iye akusimba kuti: “Nthawi ina ndinakhumudwa ndi utumiki wanga. Choncho ndinapempha kuti ndilankhule ndi  woyang’anira woyendayenda. Mbaleyu anamvetsera komanso anayesa kumvetsetsa maganizo anga. Anaoneka kuti anamvetsanso ngakhale nkhawa yomwe ndinali nayo yakuti mwina andidzudzula ndikamuuza mmene ndimamvera. Mbaleyo ananditsimikizira kuti maganizo anga anali omveka, chifukwa iyenso anaganizapo chimodzimodzi nthawi ina. Zimenezi zinandithandiza kuti ndipitirizebe utumiki wanga.”

Kodi tingamvetsere ngati sitikugwirizana ndi zimene ena akunena? Kodi tingathe kunena kwa wina kuti tikuyamikira chifukwa chakuti watiuza mmene iye akumvera? Inde tingatero. Bwanji ngati mnyamata wamng’ono atachita ndewu kusukulu kapena ngati mtsikana wachichepere atabwera kunyumba kuchokera kusukulu akunena kuti wapeza chibwenzi? Kodi sikungakhale koyenera kuti kholo limvetsere ndi kuyesetsa kumvetsa chimene wachinyamatayo akuganiza asanayambe kumufotokozera mwanayo za makhalidwe oipa ndi abwino?

Lemba la Miyambo 20:5 limati:“Uphungu wa m’mtima mwa munthu ndiwo madzi akuya; koma munthu wozindikira adzatungapo.” Ngati munthu wanzeru ndi wodziwa zambiri sakufuna kutipatsa uphungu womwe sitinaupemphe, tingafunike kum’limbikitsa kuti atipatse uphungu wake. N’chimodzimodzinso ngati timvetsera mwachikondi. Kuti munthu anene zomwe sanafune kunena, tifunika tikhale ozindikira. Kufunsa mafunso kungatithandize, koma tiyenera kusamala kuti mafunso athuwo asakhale ofufuza nkhani zaumwini. Zingakhale zothandiza ngati mutapempha munthu amene akulankhulayo kuti ayambe kulankhula zinthu zomwe angamasuke kuzitchula. Mwachitsanzo, mkazi amene akufuna kunena za mavuto a m’banja mwake angaone kukhala kosavuta kuyamba kulongosola za mmene iye ndi mwamuna wake anakumanirana ndi kukwatirana. Munthu amene analeka kulalikira angayambe ndi kulongosola mosavuta mmene anaphunzirira choonadi.

Kumvetsera Mwachikondi N’kovuta

Kumvetsera kungakhale kovuta ngati wina wakwiya chifukwa cha zimene ife tachita. Zimakhala choncho chifukwa chakuti mwachibadwa aliyense amafuna kudziteteza. Kodi tingachite bwanji zinthu zikakhala choncho? Lemba la Miyambo 15:1 limati: “Mayankhidwe ofatsa abweza mkwiyo.” Kumuitana munthuyo mwachikondi kuti mulankhule naye ndi kumumvetsera pamene akunena madandaulo ake, ndi njira ina yoyankhira mofatsa.

Mikangano imakhala pakati pa anthu awiri omwe amangobwerezabwereza zomwe anena kale. Aliyense wa iwo amaona kuti mnzakeyo sakumumvetsera. Zingakhale zosavuta ngati mmodzi wa iwo atasiya kulankhula n’kuyamba kumvetsera. Inde, n’kofunika kudziletsa ndiponso kulankhula mosamala ndi mwachikondi. Baibulo limatiuza kuti: “Wokhala chete achita mwanzeru.”​—Miyambo 10:19.

Luso lomvetsera mwachikondi silibwera lokha ayi. Komabe, ndi luso lomwe tingathe kuliphunzira mwa kuchita khama ndi kudziletsa. N’kofunikadi kukulitsa luso limeneli. Zoonadi, kumvetsera ena akamalankhula ndi umboni wakuti timawakonda. Ndiponso kumatibweretsera chimwemwe. Choncho, ndi nzeru kukhala ndi luso lomvetsera mwachikondi.

[Mawu a M’munsi]

[Chithunzi patsamba 11]

Tikamamvetsera, tiyenera kusiya kaye zofuna zathu

[Chithunzi patsamba 12]

Kumvetsera kumavuta ngati munthu wina wakwiya chifukwa cha zimene ife tachita