Kulera Bwino Ana M’dziko Lolekererali

KODI munayamba mwaonapo mwana yemwe akupempha makolo ake kuti am’gulire chidole chomwe makolowo sakufuna? Kapenanso mwana yemwe akufuna kupita kosewera koma makolo ake amuuza kuti, “Usachoke”? Makolo amachita zimenezi n’cholinga chofuna kuteteza mwanayo. Komabe, iye akapitiriza kulilira, nthawi zambiri makolowo amalolera zimene mwanayo akufuna.

Makolo ambiri amaganiza kuti akamalolera zilizonse zimene ana akufuna ndiye kuti akuwakonda anawo. Mwachitsanzo, ana okwana 750 azaka za pakati pa 12 ndi 17 a ku United States, anafunsidwa kuti anene zimene amachita makolo awo akawakaniza kuchita zinthu zinazake. Pa ana amenewa, ana okwana pafupifupi 60 pa 100 alionse ananena kuti amaumirirabe kupempha chinthucho. Ndipo ana 55 pa 100 alionse ananena kuti akapitiriza kuumirira, makolowo amagonjera n’kuchita zimene anawo akufuna. Makolowo amachita zimenezi poganiza kuti akuwakonda anawo. Koma kodi n’kuwakondadi anawo?

Taganizirani za mwambi wa m’Baibulo wakuti: “Yemwe alera kapolo wake mwaufulu kuyambira ubwana wake, pambuyo pake adzadziyesa mwana wobala.” (Miyambo 29:21) N’zoona kuti mwana si kapolo. Koma kodi simukuvomereza kuti mfundo imeneyi imagwiranso ntchito pankhani yolera ana? Kulera ana “mwaufulu,” kapena kuti mowalekerera, n’kumangowapatsa chilichonse chomwe akufuna, kungawachititse kuti adzakhale anthu osayamikira akadzakula.

Koma Baibulo limalangiza makolo kuti: “Phunzitsa mwana poyamba njira yake.” (Miyambo 22:6) Makolo anzeru amatsatira malangizo amenewa ndipo amaika malamulo osapita m’mbali, osasinthasintha ndiponso oti anawo angathe kuwatsatira. Iwo amadziwa kuti kulekerera ana si kuwakonda, ndipo savomereza zofuna za mwana ngakhale atalirira kapena kuumirira chotani. Koma iwo amatsatira mawu anzeru a Yesu akuti: “Tangotsimikizani kuti mukati Inde akhaledi Inde, ndipo mukati Ayi akhaledi Ayi.” (Mateyo 5:37) Koma kodi makolo angatani kuti aphunzitse bwino ana awo? Taonani fanizo lotsatirali lomwe n’lothandiza kwambiri.

“Akunga Mivi M’dzanja”

Baibulo limafotokoza m’gwirizano umene umakhalapo pakati pa makolo ndi ana. Limati makolo amafunikira kutsogolera ana awo. Lemba la Salmo 127:4, 5 limati: “Ana a ubwana wake wa munthu akunga mivi m’dzanja lake la chimphona. Wodala munthu amene anadzaza  nayo phodo lake.” Motero Baibulo limayerekezera ana ndi mivi, ndiponso limayerekezera makolo ndi chimphona. Munthu woponya mivi sangalase mwangozi chinthu chimene akufuna. Choncho, makolo amene amakonda ana awo amazindikira kuti amafunikira kuchita khama kuti alere bwino ana awo. Iwo amafuna kuti ana awo akule bwino n’kudzakhala anthu osangalala ndiponso odalirika. Amafunanso kuti ana awo azisankha zinthu mwanzeru ndi kupewa zinthu zomwe zingawabweretsere mavuto komanso kuti azikhala ndi zolinga zabwino. Koma makolo ayenera kuyesetsa ngati akufuna kuti zimenezi zitheke.

Kodi n’chiyani chimene chimafunika kuti muvi ulase chinthu chimene munthu akufuna? Muviwo uyenera kukonzedwa bwino, kutetezedwa bwino, ndipo uyenera kuponyedwa mwamphamvu ndiponso molunjika. Mofananamo, ana amafunika kuwakonzekeretsa, kuwateteza ndiponso kuwatsogolera kuti akule bwino. Tiyeni tikambirane mfundo zitatu zimenezi, imodzi ndi imodzi.

Konzani Bwino Mivi Yanu

Mivi imene anthu ankagwiritsa ntchito m’nthawi za m’Baibulo inali kukonzedwa mosamala kwambiri. Muvi, womwe nthawi zina unkakhala wa mtengo wopepuka, ankaupala bwinobwino kuti ukhale wowongoka kwambiri. Ndipo ankausongola kumapeto kwake, koma kumapeto kwinako ankamangirirako nthenga n’cholinga choti muviwo uyende bwino akauponya.

Makolo amafuna kuti ana awo akhale ndi maganizo owongoka ngati mivi yowongoka imeneyi. Motero makolo ozindikira salekerera zolakwa za ana awo koma amawathandiza mwachikondi kuti awongolere zolakwazo. Pamakhala ntchito yambiri kuti makolo alere bwino mwana aliyense chifukwa “utsiru umangidwa mumtima mwa mwana.” (Miyambo 22:15) Motero, Baibulo limalimbikitsa makolo kuti azilangiza ana awo. (Aefeso 6:4) N’zoona, malangizo amathandiza kwambiri ana kuti asiye maganizo ndi makhalidwe oipa.

N’chifukwa chake lemba la Miyambo 13:24, limati: “Wolekerera mwana wake osam’menya amuda; koma wom’konda am’yambize kum’langa.” Palembali, chilango chikutanthauza njira ina iliyonse imene makolo angagwiritse ntchito powongolera ana awo. Makolo amayesetsa kulangiza ana awo mwachikondi powongolera zolakwa zawo. Koma ngati angawalekerere, anawo angazolowere khalidwe loipalo ndipo lingadzawalowetse m’mavuto. Choncho, n’zoonekeratu kuti ngati makolo akulekerera ana, ndiye kuti sakuwakonda.

Makolo amene amakonda ana awo amawathandizanso kumvetsa chifukwa chimene aikira malamulowo. Motero kulera bwino ana sikumangotanthauza kuika malamulo ndi kupereka chilango. Koma chofunika kwambiri ndi kuthandiza mwanayo kumvetsa malamulowo. Baibulo limati: ‘Wosunga chilamulo ndiye mwana wozindikira.’​—Miyambo 28:7.

Nthenga zimene woponya mivi amamangirira kumapeto kwa muvi zimathandiza kuti muviwo akauponya, uyende molunjika chinthu chimene akufuna kulasacho. Mofanana ndi zimenezi, mfundo za m’Baibulo, zomwe ndi zochokera kwa yemwe anayambitsa banja, zingathandize ana kwa moyo wawo wonse ngakhale atachoka panyumba. (Aefeso 3:14, 15) Kodi makolo angatani kuti aonetsetse kuti mfundo za m’Baibulo zakhazikika m’mitima ya ana awo?

Taonani malangizo amene Mulungu anapereka kwa makolo m’nthawi ya Mose. Iye anati: “Mawu awa ndikuuzani lero, azikhala pamtima panu; ndipo muziwaphunzitsa mwachangu kwa ana anu.” (Deuteronomo 6:6, 7) Motero, makolo ayenera kutsatira njira ziwiri. Njira yoyamba, makolowo ayenera kuphunzira Mawu a Mulungu ndi kumawagwiritsa ntchito ndipo afunika kukondadi malamulo a Mulungu. (Salmo 119:97) Akachita zimenezi ndiye kuti angathe kutsatira njira yachiwiri yomwe ndi ‘kuphunzitsa’ ana awo malamulo a Mulungu. Zimenezi zikutanthauza kuti ayenera kuphunzitsa ana awo mwakhama ndiponso mobwerezabwereza n’cholinga choti mfundo za m’Baibulo zikhazikike m’mitima yawo.

Motero mfundo za m’Baibulo n’zothandiza kwambiri kuti makolo alere bwino ana masiku ano, ngakhale kuti Baibulo linalembedwa  kale kwambiri. Njira zimenezi n’zothandiza kuti “mivi,” kapena kuti ana akule bwino.

Tetezani Mivi Yanu

Tiyeni tionenso fanizo lija lopezeka pa Salmo 127:4, 5. Kumbukirani kuti woponya mivi uja ‘anadzaza phodo lake’ ndi mivi. Ndipo atakonza miviyo anafunika kuiteteza. Motero iye anainyamulira m’phodo lake momwe inali yotetezeka. N’zochititsa chidwi kuti Baibulo limanena mwaulosi ponena za Mesiya kuti iye anali muvi wokonzedwa bwino umene Atate wake ‘anausunga m’phodo lake.’ (Yesaya 49:2) Yehova Mulungu ndi Tate wachikondi kwambiri yemwe sitingamuyerekeze ndi wina aliyense. Ndipo iye anateteza Mwana wake wokondedwa Yesu, yemwe anali Mesiya, ku zinthu zomwe zikanamuwononga kufikira nthawi yomwe anafunika kuphedwa monga momwe ulosi unanenera. Ngakhale panthawi imene anaphedwa, Mulungu anateteza Mwana wakeyo mwa kumuukitsa kenako n’kum’patsa moyo wosatha kumwamba.

Nawonso makolo amene amakonda ana awo amayesetsa kuwateteza ku zinthu zoipa za m’dzikoli zomwe zingawawononge. Mwina angawaletse kuti asamachite nawo zinthu zina zimene zingawononge makhalidwe awo abwino. Mwachitsanzo, makolo anzeru sanyalanyaza mfundo yofunika yakuti: “Mayanjano oipa amawononga makhalidwe abwino.” (1 Akorinto 15:33) Motero kuteteza ana kuti asamacheze ndi anthu omwe satsatira mfundo za m’Baibulo kungathandize kuti anawo asachite zinthu zomwe zingawabweretsere mavuto aakulu.

Koma si nthawi zonse pamene ana angamvetse chifukwa chimene makolo akuperekera malangizowo. Nthawi zina ana sangasangalale ndi malangizowo chifukwa monga makolo mumafunikira kuwaletsa zinthu zina kuti muwateteze. Wolemba mabuku wina wotchuka analemba nkhani yokhudza kulera ana kuti: “Ana amafuna kuti makolo aziwateteza, ndiponso aziwapatsa malangizo othandiza ngakhale kuti nthawi zambiri anawo sangamvetse kufunika kwake nthawi yomweyo. Makolo angachite zimenezi ngati sakulekerera ana awo ndiponso akuwapatsa malamulo omveka bwino.”

Kuteteza ana anu ku zinthu zimene zingawachititse kuti achimwe, asakhale ndi mtendere  ndiponso ubwenzi wabwino ndi Mulungu n’kofunika kwambiri. Makolo akamachita zimenezi amasonyeza kuti amawakonda kwambiri ana awo. Ndipo anawo akadzakula, m’pamene angadzazindikire kufunika kwa malamulo omwe munkawapatsa ndipo angadzakuyamikireni kwambiri chifukwa chowateteza.

Wongolerani Mivi Yanu

Taonani kuti lemba la Salmo 127:4, 5, limayerekezera kholo ndi “chimphona.” Kodi zimenezi zikusonyeza kuti ndi bambo yekha yemwe ali ndi udindo wolangiza ana? Ayi sichoncho. Ndipotu, mfundo ya m’fanizo limeneli ikugwira ntchito kwa onse awiri, bambo ndi mayi ngakhalenso makolo omwe ali okha. (Miyambo 1:8) Mawu akuti “chimphona” akutanthauza kuti pamafunika mphamvu ndithu kuti munthu akoke uta poponya muvi. M’nthawi za m’Baibulo, uta ankaukuta ndi mkuwa moti msilikali ankafunika ‘kukoka utawo’ mwamphamvu, mwinanso kuchita kuupondera kuti aukoke bwino. (Yeremiya 50:14, 29) Choncho n’zoonekeratu kuti pankafunika mphamvu ndiponso khama kuti munthu akoke uta ndiponso kuti alase chinthu chimene akufuna.

N’chimodzimodzinso ndi kulera ana. Pamafunika khama kuti ana akule bwino. Ana sangadziyang’anire okha, monga mmene zilili ndi muvi kuti sungadziponye wokha kuti ulase chinthu. Koma n’zomvetsa chisoni kuti makolo ochuluka masiku ano amalekerera kwambiri ana awo. Iwo amasankha njira zachidule zolerera ana. Amalekerera kuti ana awo aphunzitsidwe ndi TV ndiponso anzawo akusukulu pankhani zokhudza kusiyanitsa chabwino ndi choipa, makhalidwe ndiponso nkhani za kugonana. Makolowo amalekerera ana awo kuti azichita zonse zimene akufuna. Ndipo akaona kuti ziwavuta kuletsa ana awo kuchita chinthu chinachake, makolo amangovomereza zofuna za anawo poopa kuti mwina angakhumudwe. Koma zoona zake n’zakuti, kulekerera ana n’kumene kungawaononge kwabasi.

Kulera ana ndi ntchito yovuta zedi. Kugwira ntchito imeneyi ndi mtima wonse modalira mawu a Mulungu kumafuna khama koma zotsatira zake zimakhala zosangalatsa kwambiri. Magazini ina yolangiza makolo inati: “Ofufuza . . . apeza kuti ana amene amaleredwa ndi makolo achikondi koma osalekerera, amakhoza bwino kusukulu, amakhala anthu olongosoka, sadzikayikira, ndiponso amasangalala ndi moyo wawo. Koma ana amene makolo awo ali olekerera kapena ovuta kwambiri sakhala otere ayi.”​—Parents.

Komanso pali phindu lina. Takambirana kale mbali yoyamba ya lemba la Miyambo 22:6 yomwe imati: “Phunzitsa mwana poyamba njira yake.” Koma vesili limapitiriza ndi mawu olimbikitsa akuti: “Ndipo angakhale atakalamba sadzachokamo.” Kodi lemba limeneli likusonyeza kuti makolo akangochita zimenezi ndiye kuti basi mwanayo akula bwino? Ayi, sichoncho. Mwana ali ndi ufulu wosankha ndipo akakula akhoza kuchita zimene akufuna. Koma vesili likulimbikitsa makolo mwachikondi. Kodi likuwalimbikitsa kuchita chiyani?

Ngati makolo aphunzitsa ana awo malangizo a m’Baibulo, ndiye kuti akuwathandiza kuti akule bwino n’kukhala anthu osangalala ndiponso odalirika. (Miyambo 23:24) Choncho, yesetsani kukonzekeretsa “mivi” yanu yamtengo wapataliyi yomwe ndi ana anu, itetezeni ndiponso iwongolereni. Mukatero simudzanong’oneza bondo ngakhale pang’ono.

[Chithunzi patsamba 13]

Kodi makolo akamapatsa ana awo chilichonse chimene anawo akufuna, ndiye kuti akuwakonda?

[Chithunzi patsamba 15]

Makolo amene amakonda ana awo amawalongosolera momveka bwino chifukwa chimene aikira malamulo

[Chithunzi patsamba 15]

Makolo ozindikira amateteza ana awo ku zinthu za m’dzikoli zimene zingawawononge

[Chithunzi patsamba 16]

Kulera ana ndi ntchito yovuta zedi, koma zotsatira zake zimakhala zosangalatsa kwambiri