MFUNDO ZOTHANDIZA MABANJA | KULERA ANA
Mmene Mungalangizire Ana Anu
Zimene muyenera kudziwa
M’zikhalidwe zina, ana amakondana kwambiri ndi makolo awo ndipo amayembekezera kuti makolowo ndi amene aziwapatsa malangizo. Pamene m’zikhalidwe zina, ana amakonda kufunsa malangizo kwa ana anzawo.
Ana akamatsatira malangizo a anzawo amasiya kumvera makolo awo. Ndipotu akamakula, makolo akhoza kuyamba kuda nkhawa poganiza kuti akulephera udindo wawo. N’chifukwa chake ana akamakonda kucheza limodzi ndi ana anzawo, akakula amakhala ngati analerana okhaokha osati ndi makolo awo.
N’chifukwa chiyani zimakhala zosavuta kuti ana azigwirizana kwambiri ndi ana anzawo kusiyana ndi makolo awo? Taganizirani zinthu zotsatirazi:
Sukulu. Ana akamakonda kucheza kwambiri ndi ana anzawo, amayamba kukondana kwambiri ndipo zimenezi zimachititsa kuti aziyendera maganizo a ana anzawowo kuposa a makolo. Zimenezi zikhoza kupitirirabe ngakhale akadzakula.
Kusowa nthawi yokwanira yocheza limodzi. M’mabanja ambiri ana akaweruka kusukulu amakapeza kunyumba kwawo kulibe aliyense, mwina chifukwa choti kholo kapena makolo awo ali kuntchito.
Zimene achinyamata amakonda kuchita. Ana akamakula amatengera kwambiri makhalidwe a achinyamata anzawo, kuphatikizapo mavalidwe, malankhulidwe komanso mmene amachitira zinthu. Amaona kuti zimene anzawo angawauze ndiye zofunika kwambiri kuposa zimene makolo awo angawauze.
Otsatsa malonda. Zinthu zosiyanasiyana zimene amalonda amagulitsa komanso zosangalatsa zambiri zimakhala za achinyamata. Zimenezi zimachititsa kuti pakhale kusiyana kwakukulu pa zomwe ana amakonda ndi zimene makolo awo angakonde. Dr.Robert Epstein analemba kuti: “Zikanakhala kuti achinyamata samatengeka ndi a zamalonda, bwenzi mafakitale omwe amapeza ndalama mabiliyoni ambirimbiriwa atatsekedwa.” a
Zimene mungachite
Muzikonda kucheza kwambiri ndi ana anu.
Baibulo limanena kuti: “Ndipo mawu awa amene ndikukulamula lero azikhala pamtima pako, ndi kuwakhomereza mwa ana ako. Uzilankhula nawo za mawuwo ukakhala pansi m’nyumba mwako, poyenda pamsewu, pogona ndi podzuka.”—Deuteronomo 6:6, 7.
Ana anu akhoza kukhala ndi anzawo apamtima, koma anzawowo sakuyenera kukulandani udindo wanu monga kholo. Ndipotu chosangalatsa n’choti akatswiri amanena kuti ana komanso achinyamata ambiri amalemekeza makolo awo ndipo amafuna kuwasangalatsa. Choncho mukamakonda kucheza kwambiri ndi ana anu, zimakhala zosavuta kuti azikumverani kuposa ana anzawo.
“Muzikhala ndi nthawi yocheza ndi ana anu komanso kuchitira limodzi zinthu za tsiku ndi tsiku monga kuphika, kukonza pakhomo ngakhalenso kuwathandiza homuweki. Muzichitiranso limodzi zinthu zosangalatsa monga kusewera magemu, kuonera mafilimu kapena TV. Musamaganize kuti kucheza ndi ana anu mwa apo ndi apo n’kokwanira ayi. Ndipotu ngati mumasowa nthawi yokwanira yochezera limodzi, n’zosatheka kuti muzigwirizana nawo kwambiri.”—Lorraine.
Muziwathandiza kuti azichezanso ndi anthu a misinkhu yosiyanasiyana.
Baibulo limanena kuti: “Uchitsiru umakhazikika mumtima mwa mwana.”—Miyambo 22:15.
Makolo ena amamva bwino ana awo akakhala ndi anzawo ambiri. Komabe, ngakhale kuti zimenezi zingasonyeze kuti mwana wanuyo amacheza bwino ndi anzake a misinkhu yake, mwanayo amayenera kukhalanso ndi anzake a misinkhu yosiyanasiyana kuti azimuthandiza kukhala woganiza bwino. Ndipotu achinyamata sangapereke malangizo othandizadi kwa mnzawo kuposa malangizo omwe makolo angapereke.
“Mwana wanu akhoza kukhala ndi anzake odziwa zinthu zina, komabe anzakewo sangadziwe zambiri zokhudza mmene moyo umakhalira ndiponso zomwe angakumane nazo. Komanso achinyamata sangakhale ndi nzeru zothandizira achinyamata anzawo kusankha bwino zochita. Choncho achinyamata akamatsatira malangizo a makolo awo, akamakula amachita zinthu mwanzeru.”—Nadia.
Muzipereka malangizo anzeru.
Baibulo limanena kuti: “Munthu woyenda ndi anthu anzeru adzakhala wanzeru.”—Miyambo 13:20.
Ana anu akamakula, akhoza kuphunzira zambiri kuchokera kwa inuyo mukamapeza nthawi yocheza nawo. Choncho muzikhala chitsanzo chabwino kwa anawo.
“Zitsanzo zabwino kwambiri kwa ana ndi makolo awo. Ana akamaphunzitsidwa kuyamikira komanso kulemekeza makolo awo, amafuna kuti akadzakula adzakhale ngati makolo awowo.”—Katherine.
a Kuchokera m’buku lakuti Teen 2.0—Saving Our Children and Families From the Torment of Adolescence.