Muri iki kiganiro, turaza kubona ibi bikurikira:

•  Sebibondo afise ibanga irihe?

•  Kubera iki ibanga rya sebibondo ari iridasanzwe?

•  Ba sebibondo n’abakobwa babo

•  Impanuro kuri ba sebibondo

•   Imbere y’uko umwana wanyu avuka. Ukuntu ufata umugore wawe ubu birerekana ingene uzofata umwana wawe amaze kuvuka. Igitabu Do Fathers Matter? kivuga giti:

   «Hamwe sebibondo yofasha umukenyezi wiwe igihe yibungenze, nko kuja gusuma, kumuherekeza agiye kubonana n’abaganga hamwe no kwirabira umwana akiri mu nda muri ca cuma bita échographie canke akumviriza ingene umwana atera akiri mu nda, birashoboka cane ko azokworoherwa no gufashanya n’umugore wiwe umwana amaze kuvuka.»

   «Sinipfuza ko umukenyezi wanje yumva ko ariko yitwararika ivy’iyo mbanyi wenyene, rero naramufasha uko nshoboye kwose. Twaranategurira hamwe icumba c’umwana. Twempi twari duhimbawe kwitegurira ico kibondo.»​—Vyavuzwe na James.

   Ico Bibiliya ivuga: «Umwe wese ubwiwe ntagume araba ivyiwe bwite gusa, ariko arabe n’ivy’abandi.»​—Abafilipi 2:4.

•   Umwana wanyu amaze kuvuka. Igihe sebibondo akina n’umwana wiwe, akaza aramuterura bituma bagiranira ubugenzi bukomeye. Nufashe mu bijanye no kwitwararika umwana wanyu. Ukuntu ufasha mu bijanye no kumurera biragira ikintu kinini bifashije ku kuntu agenda arakura. Ubucuti ugiranira n’umwana wawe burerekana ko ubona yuko ari uw’agaciro.

   «Nuje ku rugero rumwe n’umwana wawe, mukine, umufyinishe, umutwenze kandi na wewe utwenge. Niwibuke ko kugira umwana wawe agaragarize abandi urukundo bizovana n’ukuntu wewe umuvyeyi umufata.»​—Vyavuzwe na Richard.

   Ico Bibiliya ivuga: «Abana ni intoranwa iva kuri Yehova; ivyamwa vy’inda ni impera atanga.»​—Zaburi 127:3.

•   Uko umwana wanyu akura. Abashakashatsi berekana ko abana bafitaniye ubugenzi bwa hafi na ba se babo baronka amanota meza kw’ishure, barwara gake akabonge kandi ko badakunze gufata ibiyayuramutwe canke ngo babe inkozi z’ikibi. Rero, nufate umwanya ukwiye kugira ukomeze ubucuti ufitaniye n’umwana wawe.

   «Umuhungu wanje yambwiye ko hamwe yokwimuka, ikintu ca mbere yokumbura ari ibiyago twagiranira turi mu muduga canke turiko turafungura. Bimwe mu bintu bihambaye cane twayaga vyaza ntavyiteze. Wasanga vyitayemwo kubera twamaranye umwanya munini.»​—Vyavuzwe na Dennis.

   Ico Bibiliya ivuga: «Mugume muraba neza ukuntu mugenda, ntimugende nk’abatagira ubukerebutsi ariko mugende nk’abantu b’inkerebutsi, mwicungurira umwanya ubereye.»​—Abanyefeso 5:15, 16.

 Kera vyari vyitezwe ko ba sebibondo ari bo bajejwe kuronsa abagize umuryango wabo ivyo bakeneye mu vy’umubiri no kubakingira, mu gihe ba inabibondo baba bajejwe kwitwararika ukuntu abagize umuryango biyumva. (Gusubira mu vyagezwe 1:31; Yesaya 49:15) Mu miryango imwimwe, ba sebibondo barakora ibintu ba inabibondo bari gukora canke na ho ba inabibondo bagakora ibintu ba sebibondo bari gukora. Naho biri ukwo, abashakashatsi bavuga ko yaba sebibondo canke inabibondo, umwe wese afise ikintu kidasanzwe aterera mu kurera abana babo. a

 Umushakashatsi mu bijanye n’ingo yitwa Judith Wallerstein arigana ivyamushikiye bishira ahabona ico ciyumviro. Yanditse ati: «Igihe imodoka yagonga agakobwa kanje k’imyaka cumi n’ibiri, kashaka ko papa wako ari we yogaherekeza muri rusehabaniha kubera ko kari kizigiye yuko ari we ashobora kugakingira. Tugeze mu bitaro na ho, kashaka ko nguma nicaye iruhande yako umusi wose kugira ndakaremeshe.» b

 «Sebibondo arashobora gutuma abagize umuryango batekana kandi bakumva ko bakingiwe kuruta uko inabibondo yobikora ari wenyene. Muri ico gihe nyene, inabibondo arafasha mu gutuma abana bumva ko bakunzwe kandi ko babatahura kubera ukuntu abumviriza abigiranye impuhwe. Muri ubwo buryo, sebibondo na inabibondo baba bariko barafashanya.»​—Vyavuzwe na Daniel.

 Ico Bibiliya ivuga: «Umviriza mwananje, indero ya so wawe, kandi ntuhebe itegeko rya nyoko wawe.»​—Imigani 1:8.

 Sebibondo arigisha umukobwa wiwe ukuntu abandi bagabo bakwiye kumufata. Ivyo avyiga muri ubu buryo bubiri bukurikira:

•   Mu kwitegereza uko ufata nyina wiwe. Igihe ukunda umugore wawe ukongera ukamwubaha, bituma umukobwa wawe abona kamere zihambaye uwuzomubera umugabo akwiye kuba afise.​—1 Petero 3:7.

•   Mu kwitegereza ingene umufata. Igihe wereka umukobwa wawe ko umwubaha, uba uriko uramwigisha kwiyubaha we ubwiwe. Biramwigisha kandi ingene abandi bagabo bakwiye kumufata.

   Igihushanye n’ivyo, igihe wama utora amahinyu umukobwa wawe bituma yumva ata gaciro afise, agaca arondera ko abandi bagabo bomugaragariza urukundo, kandi hari aho abo bagabo usanga batamushakira ineza.

   «Umukobwa yumva ko se amukunda kandi ko amushigikira, ntiyopfa gukunda umugabo adafise kamere nziza.»​—Vyavuzwe na Wayne.