Bibiliya yoba ishobora kugufasha kurera abana bawe?

IRYO shurwe ubona ngaho (ryo mu muryango w’ayitwa orchidée), ni ishurwe wohora uraraba, mugabo riragoye gutunga. Kugira ngo uritunge, urakenera gusuzuma ubushuhe, umuco be n’ubunini bw’inkono uriteramwo. Iryo shurwe rirabangamirwa n’ivu be n’intabire bitameze neza, kandi riranyaruka kwononwa n’indwara be n’udukoko. Ni co gituma akenshi iyo umuntu agerageje kuritunga ari bwo bwa mbere bikunda kumuta ku w’amazi.

Kurera abana ni ikintu kitoroshe na gato, kandi bisaba ubwitwararitsi bwinshi. Ni ibisanzwe rero yuko abavyeyi bumva bazazaniwe ku bijanye no kurera abana. Benshi bariyumvamwo yuko bakeneye imfashanyo, nka kumwe nyene umuntu atunga rya shurwe akenera impanuro z’umuhinga w’ukuntu baritunga. Birigaragaza rero yuko umuvyeyi wese yipfuza kuronka ubuyobozi bwiza kuruta ubundi bwose. None ubuyobozi nk’ubwo bwova he?

Naho Bibiliya atari igitabu kivuga ivyo kurera abana, Umuremyi yarahumekeye abayanditse kugira bayishiremwo impanuro ngirakamaro nyinshi zijanye n’ico kibazo. Bibiliya irashimika ku kugira akigoro ko gutsimbataza kamere nziza, ico kikaba ari ikintu benshi babona ko gikunze kwirengagizwa (Abanyefeso 4:22-24). Ku bijanye n’ivyo, impanuro yo mu Vyanditswe iratanga ikintu nyamukuru gifasha kugira ngo abana batozwe indero iri ku burimbane. Impanuro bene iyo iramaze gufasha abantu ibihumbi n’ibindi bayishize mu ngiro, ata kuraba igihe babayemwo canke imico kama bakuriyemwo. Ku bw’ivyo, gukurikiza impanuro yo mu Vyanditswe birashobora kugufasha kuroranirwa mu kurera abana bawe.

Akarorero k’abavyeyi ni yo nyigisho nziza kuruta izindi zose

“Nuko wewe wigisha abandi, mbega ntiwiyigisha? Wewe wihaniza abība, weho ntiwiba? Wewe ubabuza gusambana, weho ntusambana?”.—Abaroma 2:21, 22.

Uwuhagarikiye urutonde rw’ivyigwa i Sewule yavuze ati: “Gutanga akarorero mu mvugo no mu ngiro ni bwo buryo bwiza kuruta ubundi bwose bwo kwigisha abana”. Abavyeyi badatanze akarorero keza mu mvugo no mu buryo bigenza kandi ngo bahe umwana wabo amabwirizwa atomoye, nya mwana ntazoteba kwibwira yuko abo bavyeyi ari indyarya. Ivyo abavyeyi bavuga nta co bizoba bikimaze. Nk’akarorero, nimba abavyeyi bashaka kwigisha umwana wabo kuvugisha ukuri, ubwabo bategerezwa kuba imvugakuri. Ni ikintu kimenyerewe cane ku bavyeyi bamwebamwe, igihe badashaka kwitaba telefone, kubwira umwana wabo ngo avuge ati: “Ihangane, dawe (canke mawe) si ho ari”. Umwana bategeka gukora ikintu nk’ico bizomutera ubuyega, kandi azobura ico afata n’ico areka. Amaherezo, yoshobora gutangura kubesha ata n’umutima usimba mu gihe ari mu bintu bitoroshe. Ku bw’ico, nimba abavyeyi bashaka vy’ukuri yuko umwana wabo aba umuntu avugisha ukuri, ubwabo bategerezwa kuvugisha ukuri kandi imvugo ikajana n’ingiro.

Woba ushaka kwigisha umwana wawe kuvugana urupfasoni? Utegerezwa rero gutanga akarorero keza. Umwana wawe ntazoteba kukwigana. Uwitwa Sung-sik, akaba ari sebibondo w’abana bane, avuga ati: “Twe n’umukenyezi wanje twarafashe ingingo yo kudakoresha imvugo iteye isoni. Twarubahana kandi ntituvugire hejuru n’igihe nyene  twaba twababaye canke twashavuye. Akarorero keza karabaye ngirakamaro rwose kuruta amajambo gusa. Turahimbarwa kubona abana bacu bubaha abandi kandi bakabasonera igihe bariko baraganira na bo”. Mu B’i Galatiya 6:7, Bibiliya ivuga iti: “Ic’umuntu abiba cose [ni] co azokwimbura”. Abavyeyi bipfuza yuko abana babo bisunga ingingo mfatirwako ziri hejuru zijanye n’inyifato runtu, bategerezwa kubanza kugaragaza yuko ubwabo babaho bisunga mwene izo ngingo.

Nimugume museruriranira akari ku mutima bitagoranye

“Muze mugire umwete wo [kwigisha amabwirizwa y’Imana] abana banyu; muze muyahoze mu kanwa iyo mwicaye mu nzu, n’iyo muriko muragenda mu nzira, n’iyo muryamye, n’iyo muvyutse”.—Gusubira mu vyagezwe 6:7.

Abantu bariko bararushiriza kugira impengamiro yo kubandanya bakora inyuma y’amasaha y’akazi. Igihe umunega n’umukenyezi bompi bakora akazi, biragira ico bikoze gikomeye ku bana. Umwanya abavyeyi benshi bamarana n’abana babo uriko uragabanuka. Igihe abavyeyi bari i muhira, bategerezwa gukora udukorwa two mu rugo be n’utundi dukorwa, ari co gituma bashobora kuba barushe canke mbere basanzaye. None ibintu vyifashe gutyo, wokora iki kugira ngo wewe n’abana bawe mugume museruriranira akari ku mutima bitagoranye? Uturyo two kuyaga twoshobora kuboneka nka hamwe wewe n’abana bawe mwokorera hamwe udukorwa tw’i muhira. Serugo umwe mbere yarikuyeko televiziyo yari afise, ivyo akaba yabigize ahanini kugira ngo aronke umwanya wiyongereye wo kuza arayaga n’abana biwe. Yavuze ati: “Mu ntango abana bararambirwa, mugabo uko naza ndakina na bo udukino two gupfindana, nkongera nkaganira na bo ibintu bishimishije vyo mu bitabu, bahavuye bamenyera iryo hinduka”.

Birahambaye yuko kuva abana bakiri bato bamenyera guseruranira akari ku mutima n’abavyeyi babo. Bitagenze gutyo, mu gihe abana bashitse mu buyabaga maze kumbure bagashikirwa n’ingorane, ntibazobona abavyeyi nk’abagenzi bashobora kwitura. Wobafasha gute guserura akabari ku mutima? Mu Migani 20:5 havuga hati: “Inama yo mu mutima w’umuntu ni nk’amazi yo hasi mw ibenga, arik’umuntu w’umunyabgenge arayivoma”. Abavyeyi bakoresheje ibibazo bituma umwana aserura iryo agona, nko kumubaza bati “Wewe uvyiyumvirako iki?”, barashobora kuremesha abana babo guserura ivyiyumviro vyabo be n’inyiyumvo zabo.

Uzokora iki umwana wawe niyakora ikosa rikomeye? Ico ni co gihe aba akeneye kwitwararikanwa umutima mwiza. Nucungere inyiyumvo zawe zo mu mutima igihe wumviriza umwana wawe. Sebibondo umwe avuga ibikurikira ku bijanye n’ukuntu avyifatamwo mu bihe bene ivyo: “Igihe abana bakoze amakosa, ndagerageza kudashangashirwa. Ndicara maze nkumviriza ivyo bavuga. Ndagerageza gutegera ukuntu ibintu vyifashe. Igihe mbonye yuko bingoye kwigumya, ndarindira akanya gato maze ngaturura”. Niwacungera inyiyumvo zawe zo mu mutima kandi ukumviriza, igihano uzotanga kizokwemerwa bitagoranye.

Ugutoza indero gushingiye ku rukundo kurahambaye

“Ba se, ntimukaratse abana banyu, ariko mubarere, mubahana mubahanūra, uk’Umwami wacu agomba”.—Abanyefeso 6:4.

Kugira ngo havemwo ivyiza, birahambaye yuko utoza indero mu buryo burangwa urukundo. Bishoboka bite yuko abavyeyi ‘baratsa abana babo’? Mu gihe abana batojwe indero idahuye n’ikosa bakoze canke mu gihe batojwe indero mu buryo burimwo akanebaguro, bazonana. Bakwiye kwama nantaryo batozwa indero mu rukundo (Imigani 13:24). Niwazirikana hamwe n’abana bawe, bazobona yuko ubatoza indero ubitumwe n’urukundo.—Imigani 22:15; 29:19.

Ariko rero, ni vyiza ko abana bashikirwa n’inkurikizi mbi z’inyigenzo itabereye bagize. Nk’akarorero, nimba uwo mwana agiriye nabi uwundi  muntu, urashobora kumwumvisha yuko ategerezwa gusaba ikigongwe. Mu gihe arenze ku mategeko yo mu muryango, woshobora kumwima utuntu wari kumugirira, kugira ngo ushimike ku vy’uko bihambaye ko aguma yubahiriza amategeko.

Vyoba vyiza ugutoza indero kugizwe mu gihe kibereye. Mu Musiguzi 8:11 havuga hati: “Urubanza rw’igikorwa kibi naho ruciwe, ntiruherahezwa vuba, ni co gituma imitima y’abana b’abantu ihangara gukora ikibi”. Muri ubwo buryo nyene, abana benshi bazogerageza kuraba nimba boshobora gukira igihano igihe bigenjeje nabi. Igihe rero wagabishije umwana yuko uzotanga igihano kw’ikosa kanaka rizoba ryakozwe, uraraba neza yuko ico gihano ugitanga.

Ukwiruhura kwiza kurafise akamaro

“Har[i] . . . igihe co gutwenga . . . n’igihe co kuvyina”.—Umusiguzi 3:2, 4.

Ukwidagadura be n’ukwisamaza kubereye kandi kuri ku rugero birakenewe kugira ngo umwana akure mu bwenge no ku mubiri. Igihe abavyeyi bisamaza bari kumwe n’abana babo, ubucuti bunywanisha abo mu rugo buratsimbatara abana ba bo bakumva ko batekaniwe. Ni ukwisamaza bwoko ki abagize urugo bashobora kugirira hamwe? Ufashe umwanya wo kubizirikanako, urashobora kuronka ibintu vyinshi bishimishije mwokora. Hari inkino zo kwinonora imitsi zigirirwa hanze, nk’ukugendera ku makinga, be n’inkino zo gutera agapira be n’ugukina umupira w’amaboko. Niwiyumvire kandi ukuntu mushobora kwigina ibihe biteye umunezero igihe abo mu rugo bavugiriza umuziki hamwe bakoresheje ibicurarangisho. Kugendera ibibanza vyo mu micungararo kugira ngo mwihweze ibidukikije birashobora gutuma muronka ibintu vyiza muzokwama mwibuka.

Mu bihe bene ivyo, abavyeyi barashobora kwinjiza mu bana babo ukubona ivyo kwisamaza mu buryo buri ku burimbane. Hari umugabo mukirisu afise abana batatu yavuze ati: “Mu gihe bishoboka ndifatanya n’abana banje iyo bariko barisamaza. Nk’akarorero, mu gihe bariko bakina udukino two kuri orodinateri, ndababaza ivyatwo. Iyo badusiguye n’ubushwashwanutsi, ndakoresha ako karyo kugira ngo ndababwire ivyerekeye akaga kari mu kwinezereza kutabereye. Narabonye yuko baheba ukwinezereza kutabereye”. Ego cane, abana bahimbarwa n’ukwisamaza abo mu muryango bagirira hamwe, usanga badakunda kwirukira ibiganiro vyo kuri televiziyo, amavidewo, amasinema be n’udukino two kuri bwa buhinga bwo gutumatumanako amakuru bwa Internet vyerekana ubukazi, ubushegabo be n’ukunywa ibiyayuramutwe.

Nufashe abana bawe bagire abagenzi beza

“Gendana n’abanyabgenge, nawe uzogira ubgenge, arik’ūcudika n’ibipfu azokomereka”.—Imigani 13:20.

Sebibondo mukirisu umwe yaroraniwe mu kurera abana bane yavuze ati: “Nta wokwirirwa arashimika ku vy’uko uguhitamwo abagenzi kwabo ari ikintu gihambaye. Umugenzi mubi umwe arashobora gusambura igikorwa ciza cose wakoze”. Kugira ngo afashe abana biwe kugira abagenzi beza, abigiranye ubukerebutsi arababaza ibibazo nk’ibi: Umugenzi wawe somambike kuruta abandi bose ni nde? Umukundira iki? Ni igiki wamubonyeko ushaka kwigana?. Uwundi muvyeyi aratunganya ivy’uko abana biwe batumira abagenzi babo somambike i muhira. Muri ico gihe arabihweza hanyuma agaha abana biwe ubuyobozi bubereye.

Birahambaye kandi kwigisha abana yuko bashobora kurondera abagenzi mu bantu bakuze no mu bo mu runganwe rwabo. Uwitwa Bum-sun, akaba ari sebibondo afise abahungu batatu,  avuga ati: “Ndafasha abana banje gutahura yuko atari ngombwa ngo abagenzi babe abo mu runganwe rwabo gusa, nk’uko Dawidi na Yonatani bavugwa muri Bibiliya batanganya imyaka. Mu bisanzwe, ndatumira abakirisu bafise imyaka itandukanye kugira ngo bifatanye n’abana banje. Ico bivamwo ni uko abo bana bifatanya n’abantu benshi batari abo mu runganwe rwabo”. Kwifatanya n’abantu bakuze b’intangakarorero biraha abana akaryo kwo kwiga ibintu vyinshi.

Urashobora kuroranirwa mu vyo kurera abana

Twisunze itohoza rimwe ryagizwe muri Leta Zunze Ubumwe za Amerika, abavyeyi benshi bagerageje kwinjiza mu bana babo kamere zimwezimwe nk’ukwigumya, ukwihata n’ukuvugisha ukuri, basa n’aberewe ku rugero rutoyi gusa. Ni kubera iki bitaborohera? Inabibondo umwe ari mu bagizweko iryo tohoza yavuze ati: ‘Ikintu kibabaje ni uko uburyo bumwe rudende bwo kurinda abana bacu ari ukubugaranira mu cumba maze ntitwigere tubareka ngo basohoke babone isi’. Yashaka kuvuga yuko ahantu abana bakurira ubu, hononekaye cane kuruta ikindi gihe cose. Ibintu vyifashe gutyo, vyoba vy’ukuri bishoboka yuko umuntu arera abana akaroranirwa?

Nka hamwe woba ushaka gutunga rya shurwe twabona mugabo ugahagarika umutima wiyumvira ko hari aho ryokwuma, wohava usanga uvunitse inkokora. Nka hamwe umuhinga mu bijanye n’iryo shurwe yoca ahaseruka akaguterera ivyiyumviro bimwebimwe vyogufasha maze akakwizigiza ati: “Uzororanirwa niwabigira gutya”, ese ukuntu woca wumva umutima usubiye mu nda! Yehova, we Muhinga Ruheta mu bijanye n’ukuntu umuntu ameze, aratanga impanuro yerekeye uburyo bwiza kuruta ubundi bwose bwo kurera abana. Avuga ati: “Toza umwana indero akwiye kwamana, azorinda asāza atarayivamwo” (Imigani 22:6). Niwarera abana wisunze impanuro Bibiliya itanga, woshobora kuzoronka umunezero wo kubona abana bawe bakura bakaba abantu b’abashingantahe, bubahiriza abandi kandi bafise agatima ko gukora ibibereye. Bazoheza rero bakundwe n’abantu, mugabo ikiruta vyose, bazokundwa na Dawe wa twese wo mw’ijuru Yehova.