Abagabo n’abagore benshi babana batarashyingiranwa. Bamwe bahitamo kubana muri ubwo buryo ngo barebe ko bakwiranye, kandi bizere ko bazagira urugo rwiza. Ese birakwiriye ko umusore n’umukobwa babana mbere y’uko bashyingiranwa?

Muri iyi ngingo turasuzuma

•  Ni iki Bibiliya ibivugaho?

•  Ese kubana mbere yo gushyingiranwa byagufasha kwitegura gushaka?

•  Ese kubana mbere yo gushyingiranwa bituma mwizigamira amafaranga?

•  Ese kubana mbere yo gushyingiranwa byagufasha kwirinda guhitamo nabi uwo muzabana?

•  Ese hari ubundi buryo wakoresha kugira ngo umenye neza uwo muzabana?

•   Bibiliya iciraho iteka imibonano mpuzabitsina hagati y’abantu batashyingiranywe. Urugero, igira iti: ‘Mwirinde ubusambanyi’ (1 Abatesalonike 4:3; 1 Abakorinto 6:18). Ibyo bikubiyemo n’imibonano mpuzabitsina iba hagati y’umusore n’inkumi babana nubwo baba bateganya kuzashyingiranwa. a Amahame yo muri Bibiliya ashobora gufasha umusore n’inkumi kwirinda inda zitateganyijwe n’izindi ngaruka zishobora guterwa no kubana mbere yo gushyingiranwa.

•   Imana ni yo yatangije ishyingiranwa. Igihe yaritangizaga yagize iti: “Ni yo mpamvu umugabo azasiga papa we na mama we akagumana n’umugore we, maze bombi bakaba umubiri umwe” (Intangiriro 2:24). Iyo umugabo n’umugore biyemeje kubana akaramata, bituma abashakanye bagira umuryango mwiza urangwa n’urukundo.

 Bamwe ni uko babyumva. Bumva ko umusore n’inkumi babana mbere yo gushyingiranwa, babona akanya ko kumenyera ubuzima bw’abashakanye, kuko babona igihe cyo gukorera hamwe imirimo yo mu rugo kandi buri wese akarushaho kumenya imico ya mugenzi we. Icyakora, ikintu cy’ingenzi gituma abashakanye bagira urugo rwiza ni uko buri wese akomera ku isezerano bagiranye.

 Ni gute abashakanye bakwitoza kuzabana akaramata haba mu bihe byiza cyangwa mu bibi? Iyo umusore n’inkumi babana mbere yo gushyingiranwa, batekereza ko bashobora gutandukana igihe icyo ari cyo cyose babishakiye. Ubwo rero, si bwo buryo bwiza bwo kwitegura kuzagira urugo rwiza. Ibinyuranye n’ibyo, kugira urugo rwiza biterwa n’uko buri wese mu bashakanye yiyemeje gukomera ku isezerano yagiranye na mugenzi we kandi bagafatanya kugira ngo bakemurire hamwe ibibazo bahura na byo.

 Inama: Abibwira ko guhitamo kubana batarashyingiranywe bibategurira kuzashakana baba bibeshya ahubwo bibategurira kuzatana.

 Ihame rya Bibiliya: “Ibyo umuntu atera ni na byo azasarura.”—Abagalatiya 6:7.

 Bamwe ni uko babyumva. Hari ubushakashatsi bwakozwe n’Ikigo cyo muri Amerika, bwagaragaje ko abantu bane ku icumi batangiye kubana batarashyingiranwa, babikoze batekereza ko byari kubafasha gukoresha neza amafaranga. Icyakora, hashize igihe abenshi muri bo babana, bavuze ko n’ubundi batari biteguye gushakana kuko nta mafaranga ahagije bari bafite.

 Kubana mbere yo gushyingiranwa bishobora kugira izindi ngaruka, by’umwihariko ku bagore. Urugero, iyo batandukanye, akenshi abagore ni bo basigara barera abana bonyine.

 Inama: Ibibazo biterwa no kubana mbere yo gushyingiranwa bishobora kuruta kure cyane inyungu zari zitezwe.

 Ihame rya Bibiliya: “Jyewe Yehova ndi Imana yawe. Ni jye ukwigisha ibikugirira umumaro.”—Yesaya 48:17.

 Bamwe ni uko babyumva. Icyakora, hari igitabo cyavuze ko “abantu babana mbere yo gushyingiranwa inshuro nyinshi batibuka ko kuzatandukana bizabagora (Fighting for Your Marriage).” Kubera iki? Bamwe mu babana mbere yo gushyingiranwa, bashobora gusanga hari ibintu bikomeye batandukaniyeho. Ariko abashakashatsi babonye ko bakomeza kubana kuko nta kindi babihinduraho, bitewe n’uko bombi hari igihe baba bafatanya kwita ku mbwa n’ipusi zabo, bafatanya kwishyura inzu cyangwa se batwite. Mu yandi magambo, hari abahitamo kubana kuko baba babona ko gutandukana ari byo bigoye kuruta gukomeza kubana.

 Inama: Aho kugira ngo kubana mbere yo gushyingiranwa bigufashe guhitamo neza uwo muzashyingiranwa, ahubwo bishobora gutuma bikugora gutandukana n’umuntu wasanze mudakwiranye.

 Ihame rya Bibiliya: “Umunyamakenga iyo abonye ibintu biteje akaga arihisha, ariko utaraba inararibonye arakomeza akagenda, agahura n’ibibazo.”—Imigani 22:3.

 Ushobora kwirinda ingorane ziterwa no kubana n’umuntu mbere y’uko mushyingiranwa, kandi ushobora kugira icyo ukora ngo uzagire urugo rwiza. Wakora iki? Jya wiyemeza gukomera ku mahame ya Bibiliya arebana n’ishyingiranwa. Jya ufata igihe gihagije cyo kumenya neza uwo wifuza ko muzashyingiranwa mbere y’uko mutangira kubana nk’umugabo n’umugore. Mu gihe ugiye guhitamo uwo muzashakana wagombye gusuzuma niba mugendera ku mahame amwe kandi muhuje ukwizera, kuko ibyo ari byo by’ingenzi aho gukururwa n’irari ry’ibitsina.

 Bibiliya ikubiyemo inama zagufasha kugira icyo ukora, kugira ngo utangire kwitegura kuzagira urugo rwiza rurangwa n’ibyishimo. b Urugero, Bibiliya irimo amahame ashobora kugufasha . . .

•   kwirinda guca inyuma uwo mwashakanye

•   kugira imico yagufasha kuba umugabo cyangwa umugore mwiza

•   gutahura ibintu bigaragaza ko uwo murambagizanya mukwiranye

 Niba wifuza kumenya byinshi ku birebana n’izo ngingo, reba ku rubuga rwa jw.org ahanditse ngo: “Ababyeyi n’Abashakanye.”

 Ihame ryo muri Bibiliya: “Ibyanditswe byera byose byaturutse ku Mana, kandi bifite akamaro ko kwigisha umuntu.”—2 Timoteyo 3:16.