Ushobora gukomeza kuba umuntu utanduye mu by’umuco mu isi yataye umuco

HARI umugabo wari umuyumbu kandi afite uburanga. Hari umugore wari wifitiye impano kandi yari mwiza. Bombi bakoreraga ikigo kimwe. Umugore yamukoreraga ibikorwa bigaragaza ko amwitaho mu buryo bwa bwite. Umugabo yamubwiraga utugambo tugaragaza ko amwishimiye. Buri wese yajyaga agurira mugenzi we impano. Ntibyatinze batangira gukundana. Uwo mugabo yataye umugore we yisangira uwo nguwo. Amaherezo, uwo mugore yafashe umwanzuro wo kugumana n’umugabo we no guhagarika imishyikirano yari afitanye na wa mugabo bakorana. Uwo mugabo na we yagerageje kugarukira umugore we ariko afite imitima ibiri. Icyakora, kubera ko atari afite ukwicuza by’ukuri, ntiyashoboye kwiyunga n’uwo bashakanye. Buri wese muri bo yigumiye muri ubwo buzima, n’ubwo bitabuze kugira icyo bibatwara.

Muri iyi si, abantu ntibagitekereza ko kugira imyifatire myiza mu bihereranye n’ibitsina ari kimwe mu bigize amahame arebana n’ingeso nziza. Kwiruka inyuma y’ibinezeza no gushaka kwinezeza mu buryo butagira rutangira bigaragara ko ari ibintu byogeye ku isi hose. Igitabo The New Encyclopædia Britannica kigira kiti “ubusambanyi busa n’aho bukorwa ku isi hose kandi mu mimerere imwe n’imwe, usanga bwogeye nk’ishyingirwa.”

Nyamara kandi, Yehova Imana yifuza ko ishyingirwa ‘ryubahwa na bose’ kandi uburiri bw’abashakanye ‘ntibugire ikibwanduza’ (Abaheburayo 13:4). Ibyanditswe bigira biti “ntimwishuke; abahehesi, cyangwa abasenga ibishushanyo, cyangwa abasambanyi, cyangwa ibitingwa, cyangwa abagabo bendana, . . . ntibazaragwa Ubwami bw’Imana” (1 Abakorinto 6:9, 10). Ku bw’ibyo rero, kugira ngo twemerwe n’Imana, tugomba gukomeza kuba abantu batanduye mu by’umuco muri iyi si yataye umuco.

Ni gute twakwirinda ibintu byangiza bidukikije bishobora kutugiraho ingaruka mbi? Mu gice cya 5 cy’igitabo cya Bibiliya cy’Imigani, Umwami Salomo wa Isirayeli ya kera atanga ibisubizo. Nimucyo dusuzume icyo avuga.

Ubushobozi bwo gutekereza bugenewe kukurinda

Umwami wa Isirayeli atangira agira ati “mwana wanjye, ita ku bwenge bwanjye.” Yongeraho ati “tegera ugutwi ubuhanga bwanjye; kugira ngo uhore witonda [“ukomeze kurinda ubushobozi bwo gutekereza,” “NW” ], kandi iminwa yawe ikomeze ubwenge.”—Imigani 5:1, 2.

Kugira ngo tunanire ibitwoshyoshya kujya mu bwiyandarike, dukeneye ubwenge—ubushobozi bwo gushyira mu bikorwa ubumenyi bushingiye ku Byanditswe—dukeneye no kujijuka, cyangwa ubushobozi bwo gutandukanya icyiza n’ikibi, hanyuma tugahitamo inzira iboneye. Dushishikarizwa gutegera amatwi ubwenge no kujijuka kugira ngo turinde ubushobozi bwacu bwo gutekereza. Ni gute ibyo twabikora? Mu gihe twiga Ijambo ry’Imana, ari ryo Bibiliya, tugomba kwita ku buryo Yehova akora ibintu kandi tugategera ugutwi ibyo ashaka n’imigambi ye. Nitubigenza dutyo, tuzaba turimo twerekeza imitekerereze yacu mu nzira iboneye. Ubushobozi bwo gutekereza tubona binyuriye muri ubwo buryo buba buhuje n’ubwenge hamwe n’ubumenyi biva ku Mana. Mu gihe ubwo bushobozi bukoreshejwe neza, buturinda kugwa mu mutego w’amoshya arehereza abantu mu bwiyandarike.

 Irinde akanwa koroshye

Impamvu ubushobozi bwo gutekereza ari ubw’ingenzi mu gutuma dukomeza kuba abantu batanduye mu by’umuco muri iyi si yanduye, ni uko inzira z’umuntu wiyandarika zireshya. Salomo atanga umuburo agira ati “iminwa y’umugore w’inzaduka [“w’umunyamahanga,” “NW” ] itonyanga ubuki, kandi akanwa ke karusha amavuta koroha; ariko hanyuma asharīra nk’umuravumba; agira ubugi nk’ubw’inkota ityaye.”—Imigani 5:3, 4.

Muri uyu mugani, umuntu ufite imyifatire y’akahebwe agereranywa n’ “umugore w’umunyamahanga”—ni ukuvuga indaya. * Amagambo ikoresha ireshya abagabo aryohera nk’ibinyagu kandi arusha amavuta ya elayo koroha. Mbese, amenshi mu magambo abantu bakoresha bashuka abandi kugira ngo bagirane na bo imibonano y’ibitsina si uko atangira? Urugero, reka turebe ibyabaye ku mukobwa wari umunyamabanga witwaga Amy wari ufite imyaka 27, akaba yari afite uburanga. Yagize ati “umugabo dukorana anyitaho cyane kandi akanshimagiza igihe cyose abonye uburyo. Iyo umuntu yitaweho yumva ari byiza. Ariko kandi, nshobora kubona neza ko anyitaho atyo agamije gusa kugira ngo tuzagirane imibonano y’ibitsina. Sinzigera nshukwa n’amoshya ye.” Amagambo ashyeshyenga y’umugabo cyangwa umugore ureshya, ubusanzwe aba akurura, keretse gusa turamutse tumenye imiterere yayo nyakuri. Kugira ngo tubigereho tugomba gukoresha ubushobozi bwacu bwo gutekereza.

Ingaruka z’ubwiyandarike zisharira nk’umuravumba kandi zigira ubugi nk’ubw’inkota ityaye—zirababaza kandi zirica. Umutimanama uvurunganye, gutwara inda z’indaro cyangwa indwara zandurira mu mibonano mpuzabitsina akenshi usanga ari zo ngaruka zibabaje z’iyo myifatire. Tekereza kandi ku mibabaro yo mu buryo bw’ibyiyumvo igera ku washakanye n’umuntu w’umuhemu. Igikorwa kimwe cy’ubuhemu gishobora gutera ibikomere byimbitse cyane ku buryo bishobora kutazasibangana mu gihe cy’imibereho yose. Ni koko, ubwiyandarike burakomeretsa.

Umwami w’umunyabwenge akomeza agira icyo avuga ku mibereho y’umugore ufite imyifatire y’akahebwe, agira ati “ibirenge bye bimanuka bijya ku rupfu; intambwe ze ziherera ikuzimu. Bituma atabona inzira y’ubugingo itunganye; kugenda kwe ni ukuzerera, atabizi” (Imigani 5:5, 6). Inzira z’umugore wiyandarika zimuganisha ku rupfu—intambwe ze zikamuganisha muri Sheoli, imva rusange y’abantu bose. Mbega ukuntu ayo magambo ari ay’ukuri, mu gihe tubona indwara zandurira mu mibonano mpuzabitsina zirushaho gukwira hose, cyane cyane indwara ya sida! Amaherezo ye ahwanye n’ay’abantu bifatanya na we mu nzira ze zigoramye.

Umwami atanga inama agaragaza ko atwitaho abivanye ku mutima, agira ati “noneho, bahungu banjye, nimunyumvire, kandi ntimwirengagize amagambo yo mu kanwa kanjye; cisha inzira yawe kure y’uwo mugore; kandi ntiwegere umuryango w’inzu ye.”—Imigani 5:7, 8.

Tugomba kwitarura uko bishoboka kose abantu biyandarika bashobora kutugiraho ingaruka mbi. Kuki twakwitegera inzira zabo dutega amatwi imizika y’akahebwe, tureba imyidagaduro yonona, cyangwa twitegera amashusho n’amagambo ateye isoni agamije kubyutsa irari ry’ibitsina (Imigani 6:27; 1 Abakorinto 15:33; Abefeso 5:3-5)? Kandi se mbega ukuntu ari ubupfapfa gutuma batwitaho tugirana agakungu na bo cyangwa twambara kandi tukirimbisha mu buryo butarangwa no kwiyoroshya!—1 Timoteyo 4:8; 1 Petero 3:3, 4.

Ikiguzi kirahanitse cyane

Ni iyihe mpamvu yindi ituma tugomba guca ukubiri n’umuntu ufite imyifatire y’akahebwe? Salomo asubiza agira ati “kugira ngo utiyaka icyubahiro cya[w]e ngo ugihe abandi, cyangwa ngo uharire imyaka yawe abanyarugomo. Abashyitsi be guhazwa n’ibiguturukamo, kandi imirimo yawe ye gukorerwa mu nzu y’umunyamahanga; amaherezo ukazaboroga, umubiri wawe umaze gushiraho.”—Imigani 5:9-11.

Nguko uko Salomo atsindagiriza ikiguzi gihanitse cyo kwirekura umuntu akishora mu bwiyandarike. Ubusambanyi no gutakaza icyubahiro, cyangwa kutiyubaha, ntibisigana birajyana. Mbese, mu by’ukuri ntibitesha agaciro gukorera gusa gushaka guhaza irari ryacu rishingiye ku bwiyandarike cyangwa iry’undi muntu? Mbese, kwishora mu byo guhuza ibitsina n’umuntu utari uwo twashakanye ntibigaragaza kutiyubaha?

None se, ‘kwiyaka icyubahiro, guhara imyaka, ibiduturukamo n’imirimo yacu [tukabiha abashyitsi] cyangwa abanyamahanga’ bikubiyemo iki? Igitabo kimwe gitanga ibisobanuro kigira kiti “icyo iyo mirongo yerekezaho kirumvikana neza: ikiguzi cy’ubuhemu gishobora kuba gihanitse; kuko ikintu cyose umuntu agokera—umwanya w’icyubahiro, ububasha, uburumbuke—gishobora gutakara byaba  binyuriye ku byo umugore asaba abigiranye umururumba cyangwa binyuriye ku nduru ya rubanda rusaba ko yacibwa amande.” Imibonano y’ubwiyandarike ishobora gutwara ibya mirenge!

Kubera ko umuntu w’umupfapfa aba yaratakaje icyubahiro cye kandi akaba yaramaze ubutunzi bwe, ashobora kuboroga agira ati “ayii we, ko nanze kwigishwa! Umutima wanjye ukanga guhanwa; sinumviye amajwi y’abanyigishaga; kandi sintegere amatwi abampuguraga. Nari ngiye kurohama mu bibi byose imbere ya rubanda ndetse n’imbere y’iteraniro.”—Imigani 5:12-14.

Nyuma y’igihe runaka, umunyabyaha atangira kuririmba icyo intiti imwe yise “indirimbo ndende ya za ‘sinamenye’: akicuza avuga ngo iyo mbimenya nkumvira data; iyo mbimenya sinshake kwigenga; iyo mbimenya ngasaba abandi inama.” Nyamara kandi, ibyo abimenya amazi yararenze inkombe. Imibereho y’umuntu wanduye mu by’umuco noneho iba yarangiritse, kandi izina rye ryaragiyeho ikizinga. Mbega ukuntu ari iby’ingenzi ko twagenzura tukamenya ikiguzi gihanitse cyo kwishora mu bwiyandarike mbere y’uko butwifatira!

“Ujye unywa amazi y’iriba ryawe”

Mbese, Bibiliya yaba yifata ikirinda kugira icyo ivuga ku bihereranye no kugirana imibonano y’ibitsina? Oya rwose. Ibyiyumvo bituruka ku rukundo rurangwa n’ubwuzu hamwe n’umunezero mwinshi uba hagati y’umugabo n’umugore ni impano ituruka ku Mana. Ariko kandi, iyo mishyikirano ya bugufi cyane igomba kuba hagati y’abashakanye gusa. Bityo rero, Salomo agira umugabo washatse inama agira ati “ujye unywa amazi y’iriba ryawe, amazi ava mu isōko wifukuriye. Mbese, amasōko yawe yasandarira hanze, n’imigezi yawe yatemba mu mayira? Bibe ibyawe bwite, kandi ntubikorere ku nzaduka [“ku munyamahanga,” “NW” ].”—Imigani 5:15-17.

“Iriba ryawe” n’ “isōko wifukuriye” ni amagambo y’ibisigo yerekezwa ku mugore ukundwa. Kwishimira kugirana na we imibonano y’ibitsina bigereranywa no kunywa amazi afutse. Mu buryo bunyuranye n’uko bimeze ku mazi yo muri za robine zivomwaho n’abantu bose, iriba cyangwa isoko bifatwa nk’umutungo w’umuntu ku giti cye. Kandi umugabo agirwa inama yo kubyara abana ababyariye iwe mu rugo kandi ababyaranye n’umugore we aho gutagaguza imbuto ze mu mayira nyabagendwa, ni ukuvuga mu bandi bagore. Uko bigaragara, inama umugabo agirwa ni iyo kuba indahemuka ku mugore we.

Umugabo w’umunyabwenge akomeza agira ati “isōko yawe ihirwe; kandi wishimire umugore w’ubusore bwawe. Nk’imparakazi ikundwa n’isirabo nziza, amabere ye ahore akunezeza; kandi ujye wishimira cyane urukundo rwe.”—Imigani 5:18, 19.

“Isōko,” cyangwa akagezi, yerekeza ku isoko yo kunyurwa mu bihereranye n’ibitsina. Kunezezwa no kugirana imibonano y’ibitsina n’uwo mwashakanye ni “ihirwe”—rituruka ku Mana. Ni yo mpamvu umugabo aterwa inkunga yo kwishimira umugore wo mu busore bwe. Kuri we, akundwa nk’imparakazi kandi ni mwiza nka yo, anezeza nk’isirabo kandi ashimisha nka yo.

Salomo akomeza abaza ibibazo bibiri bikangura ubwenge, agira ati “mwana wanjye, kuki wakwishimira umugore w’inzaduka [“w’umunyamahanga,” “NW” ], ukagira ngo uhoberane na we?” (Imigani 5:20). Koko se, kuki umugabo washatse yashukwa kugira ngo agirane imibonano y’ibitsina n’umuntu utari uwo bashakanye binyuriye ku bantu bahurira ku kazi, ku ishuri, cyangwa se n’ahandi?

Intumwa Pawulo igira Abakristo bashatse inama igira iti “bene Data, ibi ni ibyo mvuga, yuko igihe kigabanutse: uhereye none  abafite abagore bamere nk’abatabafite” (1 Abakorinto 7:29). Ibyo bikubiyemo iki? Mu by’ukuri, abigishwa ba Yesu Kristo bagomba ‘kubanza gushaka ubwami’ (Matayo 6:33). Ku bw’ibyo rero, abashakanye ntibagomba kumara igihe cyabo cyose barebana akana ko mu jisho ku buryo bashyira inyungu z’Ubwami mu mwanya wa kabiri mu mibereho yabo.

Ni ngombwa kugira umuco wo kwirinda

Irari ry’ibitsina rishobora gutegekwa. Rigomba gutegekwa n’abantu bifuza kwemerwa na Yehova. Intumwa Pawulo yatanze inama igira iti “icyo Imana ishaka ni iki: ni ukwezwa kwanyu no kwirinda gusambana; ngo umuntu wese muri mwe amenye gutegeka umubiri we, wezwe, ufite icyubahiro.”—1 Abatesalonike 4:3, 4.

Bityo rero, abakiri bato ntibagomba guhubukira ibyo gushyingirwa mu gihe bumvise ku ncuro ya mbere irari ry’ibitsina ribyutse. Ishyingirwa risaba kwiyemeza, kandi kubaho mu buryo buhuje n’iyo nshingano bisaba kuba umuntu akuze (Itangiriro 2:24). Byarushaho kuba byiza umuntu ategereje kugeza igihe azaba “yararenze igihe cy’amabyiruka”—igihe ibyiyumvo bihereranye n’ibitsina biba bikaze cyane kandi bikaba bishobora kugoreka ubushobozi umuntu afite bwo gushyira mu gaciro (1 Abakorinto 7:36, NW ). Kandi se, mbega ukuntu ari ukubura ubwenge kandi bikaba ari n’icyaha ko umuntu ukuze wifuza gushaka yakwishora mu bwiyandarike bitewe n’uko gusa adashoboye kubona uwo bazabana!

“Umunyabyaha azafatwa no gukiranirwa kwe”

Impamvu y’ibanze ituma ubusambanyi buba bubi ni uko Yehova—we Nyir’ugutanga ubuzima kandi akaba ari na we Nyir’ugushyira mu bantu ubushobozi bwo kugira imibonano y’ibitsina—abyanga. Bityo rero, Umwami Salomo yatanze impamvu ikomeye cyane idusunikira kugira imyifatire itanduye mu by’umuco, agira ati “kuko imigendere y’umuntu iri imbere y’amaso y’Uwiteka; kandi ni we umenya imigenzereze ye yose” (Imigani 5:21). Ni koko, nta kintu na kimwe gihishwe mu maso y’Imana, yo “Izatubaza ibyo twakoze” (Abaheburayo 4:13). Igikorwa icyo ari cyo cyose cy’umwanda mu bihereranye n’ibitsina, uko cyaba gikorewe mu bwihisho kose n’ingaruka izo ari zo zose gishobora kugira mu buryo bw’umubiri no mu rwego mbonezamubano, byanze bikunze cyonona imishyikirano dufitanye na Yehova. Mbega ukuntu gutakaza amahoro dufitanye n’Imana bitewe gusa n’akanya gato cyane ko kwinezeza mu buryo budakwiriye ari ubupfapfa!

Bamwe batagira isoni zo kwirundumurira mu myifatire y’ubwiyandarike bashobora gusa n’aho babikora nk’aho bitazagira icyo bibatwara—ariko ntibizakomeza igihe kirekire. Salomo yagize ati “umunyabyaha azafatwa no gukiranirwa kwe, kandi azakomezwa n’ingoyi z’icyaha cye. Azapfa azize ko yanze kwigishwa; kandi ubupfapfa bwe bwinshi buzamutera kuyoba.”—Imigani 5:22, 23.

Kuki hagira uwo ari we wese muri twe uyoba? N’ubundi kandi, igitabo cy’Imigani kituburira mbere y’igihe kwirinda inzira z’isi zireshya. Kandi kitwereka ikiguzi ubusanzwe ubusambanyi busaba—ni ukuvuga ubuzima bwacu, ubutunzi bwacu, imbaraga zacu n’icyubahiro cyacu. Kubera ko tubimenye mbere y’igihe, ntitugomba na rimwe kuzigera tuba mu mimerere yo kuririmba indirimbo ndende ya za “sinamenye.” Ni koko, binyuriye mu gushyira mu bikorwa inama Yehova yatanze mu Ijambo rye ryahumetswe, dushobora gukomeza kuba abantu batanduye mu by’umuco mu isi yataye umuco.

[Ibisobanuro ahagana hasi ku ipaji]

[Amafoto yo ku ipaji ya 30]

Ingaruka zituruka ku bwiyandarike zisharira nk’umuravumba

[Amafoto yo ku ipaji ya 31]

“Wishimire umugore w’ubusore bwawe”