ICYO WAKORA KUGIRA NGO UGIRE IBYISHIMO MU MURYANGO
Mu gihe mufite umwana wamugaye
CARLO: * “Umuhungu wacu Angelo yavukanye indwara ifata ingirabuzimafatizo. Kumwitaho biratunaniza cyane ku buryo duhora twumva twaguye agacuho. Kugira ngo ubyumve neza, tekereza imbaraga zisabwa kugira ngo wite ku mwana muzima maze uzikube incuro ijana. Hari n’igihe bituma ugirana ibibazo n’uwo mwashakanye.”
MIA: “Kwigisha Angelo, n’iyo byaba ari ukumwigisha utuntu tworoheje cyane bisaba guhozaho no kwihangana. Iyo naniwe nkunda kurakazwa n’ubusa kandi sinihanganire umugabo wanjye Carlo. Hari igihe tujya impaka maze tugatongana.”
Ese muribuka igihe umwana wanyu yavukaga? Mwari mufite amatsiko yo kumuterura. Icyakora hari ababyeyi bameze nka Carlo na Mia, batakomeje kugira ibyishimo bitewe n’uko bamenye ko umwana wabo arwaye cyangwa ko yamugaye.
Ese mufite umwana wamugaye? Mushobora kuba mwumva ko mutazashobora kumurera. Niba ari uko bimeze, ntimucike intege. Hari abandi babyeyi muhuje ibibazo kandi bagize icyo bageraho. Reka dusuzume ibibazo bitatu mushobora guhura na byo, n’ukuntu inama zo muri Bibiliya zabafasha guhangana na byo.
IKIBAZO CYA 1: KUNANIRWA KUBYEMERA.
Iyo ababyeyi benshi bamenye ko umwana wabo yamugaye, bumva bababaye. Umubyeyi wo muri Megizike witwa Juliana, yaravuze ati “igihe abaganga bambwiraga ko umwana wacu Santiago arwaye
indwara ifata ubwonko, nabaye nk’ukubiswe n’inkuba. Numvise ijuru ringwiriye.” Hari abandi bashobora kumva bameze nk’umubyeyi wo mu Butaliyani witwa Villana. Yaravuze ati “nafashe umwanzuro wo kubyara nubwo nari nzi ko abagore turi mu kigero kimwe baba bafite ibyago byo kubyara abana bafite ibibazo. Iyo mbonye ibibazo umwana wanjye ahura na byo bitewe n’uko yavukanye ubumuga, numva niciriye urubanza.”Niba wumva wihebye cyangwa wicira urubanza, ibyo ni ibisanzwe. Kurwara ntibyari mu mugambi w’Imana (Intangiriro 1:27, 28). Muri kamere yacu, ntitwaremanywe ubushobozi bwo guhita twakira ibibazo bikomeye duhura na byo. Ubwo rero, ni ibisanzwe ko ababyeyi bababazwa n’uko umwana wabo adafite amagara mazima. Kugira ngo mutuze kandi mwakire ibyababayeho, bizabasaba igihe.
Bite se mu gihe waba wumva ko ari wowe watumye umwana wawe avukana ubumuga? Ujye wibuka ko nta muntu wasobanukirwa neza ukuntu umuryango umuntu avukamo, aho yavukiye n’ibindi, bigira ingaruka ku buzima bw’umwana. Hari n’igihe wumva ko uwo mwashakanye ari we wabigizemo uruhare. Ntukajye ubyitaho. Byaba byiza ufatanyije n’uwo mwashakanye mukita ku mwana wanyu, kandi akaba ari byo mwibandaho.—Umubwiriza 4:9, 10.
INAMA: Banza umenye uko umwana wawe amerewe. Bibiliya iravuga iti “ubwenge ni bwo bwubaka urugo kandi ubushishozi ni bwo burukomeza.”—Imigani 24:3.
Ushobora kwiyambaza abahanga mu kuvura iyo ndwara cyangwa ugasoma ibitabo byizewe bigira icyo biyivugaho. Gusobanukirwa indwara y’umwana wawe twabigereranya no kwiga ururimi rushya. Mu mizo ya mbere birakugora, ariko amaherezo ukarumenya.
Carlo na Mia bavuzwe mu ntangiriro y’iyi ngingo, bitabaje umuganga n’ikigo gishinzwe kwita ku ndwara umwana wabo yari arwaye. Baravuze bati “ibyo byadufashije gusobanukirwa ibibazo umwana ashobora kuzahura na byo, kandi bitugarurira icyizere. Twasobanukiwe ko umwana wacu na we akwiriye kubaho nk’abandi bose. Ibyo byaradufashije cyane.”
GERAGEZA IBI BIKURIKIRA: Jya wibanda ku byo umwana wawe ashobora gukora, kandi mukorere ibintu hamwe mu muryango wanyu. Niba umwana wanyu hari ikintu cyiza agezeho n’iyo cyaba ari gito, mumushimire kandi mwishimane na we.
IKIBAZO CYA 2: KUMVA UNANIWE CYANE KANDI UFITE IRUNGU.
Kwita ku mwana wawe urwaye bishobora kukunaniza. Umubyeyi witwa Jenney wo muri Nouvelle-Zélande, yaravuze ati “igihe umwana wanjye bamusuzumaga bakamusangana indwara ifata uruti rw’umugongo, najyaga gukora imirimo isanzwe yo mu rugo nkumva mbuze imbaraga maze ngatangira kurira.”
Ikindi kintu gishobora kukugora ni ukumva uri wenyine. Ben afite umwana w’umuhungu urwaye indwara ifata imyakura. Yaravuze ati “abantu benshi ntibashobora kwiyumvisha imimerere turimo.” Uba ushaka umuntu muganira, ariko ugasanga incuti zawe zifite abana bazima. Ibyo rero bituma wumva nta cyo bakumarira.
INAMA: Jya ugisha inama kandi nibayikugira uyemere. Juliana twigeze kuvuga, yaravuze ati “hari igihe jye n’umugabo wanjye twumva dufite ipfunwe ryo kugisha inama. Ariko twaje kubona ko tutihagije. Iyo abandi badufashije biraduhumuriza.” Mu gihe incuti cyangwa mwene wanyu abasabye kwicarana n’umwana wanyu mu birori cyangwa mu materaniro, mujye mubimwemerera. Bibiliya ivuga ko “incuti nyakuri igukunda igihe cyose, kandi ikubera umuvandimwe mu gihe cy’amakuba.”—Imigani 17:17.
Jya wita ku buzima bwawe. Nk’uko ambilansi zigomba guhora zinywa lisansi kugira ngo zikomeze kujyana abarwayi kwa muganga, nawe ugomba kurya neza, gukora siporo no kuruhuka kugira ngo ugarure imbaraga, bityo ushobore kwita ku mwana wawe uko bikwiriye. Javier ufite umwana wamugaye, yabivuze neza agira ati “kubera ko umwana wanjye adashobora kugenda, ngerageza kurya neza, kuko ari jye umufasha kugera aho ashaka. N’ubundi kandi, ni nk’aho ndi imbago ze.”
None se wakora iki ngo ubone igihe cyo kwiyitaho? Hari ababyeyi bajya ibihe byo kwita ku mwana wabo. Icyo gihe umubyeyi umwe aba ashobora kuruhuka cyangwa kwiyitaho. Byaba byiza wicunguriye igihe, ukareka gukora ibintu bitari ngombwa, nubwo bishobora kutakorohera. Ariko nk’uko umubyeyi wo mu Buhindi witwa Mayuri yabivuze, “ugeraho ukamenyera.”
Bibwire incuti wizeye. Burya nubwo incuti zawe Zaburi 145:18.
zaba zidafite abana barwaye, zishobora kwishyira mu mwanya wawe. Nanone ushobora gusenga Yehova Imana. Ese koko isengesho rishobora kukugirira akamaro? Umubyeyi witwa Yazmin ufite abana babiri barwaye indwara y’ubuhumekero ikomeye, yaravuze ati “hari igihe numvaga nataye umutwe, ndi hafi gusara. Icyakora gusenga Yehova musaba ihumure n’imbaraga, bimfasha kwihangana.”—GERAGEZA IBI BIKURIKIRA: Ongera usuzume ibyo urya, igihe ukorera siporo, igihe uryamira n’igihe ubyukira. Shaka uko wabona umwanya, ureka imirimo itari iy’ingenzi kugira ngo ushobore kwiyitaho. Jya uhindura gahunda zawe mu gihe bibaye ngombwa.
IKIBAZO CYA 3: KWITA KU MWANA URWAYE KURUSHA ABANDI.
Uburwayi bw’umwana bushobora guhindura ibyo abagize umuryango barya, ingendo bakora n’igihe ababyeyi bamarana n’abana. Ibyo bishobora gutuma abandi bana bumva ko batitaweho. Nanone kandi, bishobora gutuma abashakanye bahugira mu kwita ku mwana urwaye, bikagira ingaruka ku mibanire yabo. Umugabo witwa Lionel wo muri Liberiya, yaravuze ati “hari igihe umugore wanjye ambwira ko ari we wenyine wita ku mwana. Ibyo bituma numva ko ansuzuguye, maze rimwe na rimwe nkamubwira nabi.”
INAMA: Kugira ngo wizeze abana bawe bose ko ubakunda, jya ubakorera ibintu uzi ko bakunda. Jenney twigeze kuvuga yaravuze ati “hari igihe dukorera umwana wacu w’imfura ikintu cyihariye, n’iyo byadusaba gusangirira na we muri resitora akunda.”
Kugira ngo ubane neza n’uwo mwashakanye, mujye muganira kandi musengere hamwe. Umubyeyi wo mu Buhindi witwa Aseem, ufite umwana urwaye indwara yo mu bwoko bw’igicuri, yaravuze ati “nubwo jye n’umugore wanjye tujya twumva twananiwe kandi twacitse intege, turicara tukaganira kandi tugasengera hamwe. Buri gitondo mbere y’uko abana babyuka, jye na we dusuzumira hamwe umurongo wo muri Bibiliya.” Hari abandi babyeyi bashaka umwanya wo kuganira batari kumwe n’abana mbere yo kuryama. Ibiganiro mugirana mubivanye ku mutima n’amasengesho yanyu, bizatuma mukomeza kubana neza nubwo mwaba muhanganye n’ibibazo bikomeye (Imigani 15:22). Hari umugabo n’umugore bavuze bati “bimwe mu bihe byiza twamaranye, ni ibyo mu gihe twari mu ngorane.”
GERAGEZA IBI BIKURIKIRA: Jya ushimira abandi bana igihe cyose bagize icyo bamarira umwana urwaye. Jya wereka uwo mwashakanye n’abana bawe ko ubakunda kandi ko ubashimira.
KOMEZA KURANGWA N’ICYIZERE
Bibiliya isezeranya ko vuba aha Imana izakuraho ubumuga bwose, haba ku bakiri bato cyangwa abageze mu za bukuru (Ibyahishuwe 21:3, 4). Icyo gihe nikigera, “nta muturage waho uzavuga ati ‘ndarwaye.’” *—Yesaya 33:24.
Mu gihe ibyo bitaraba, ushobora gusohoza neza inshingano yawe ya kibyeyi yo kurera umwana wamugaye. Carlo na Mia twigeze kuvuga, baravuze bati “mu gihe ubona ibintu bigenda birushaho kuzamba ntugacike intege. Jya wibanda ku byiza by’umwana wawe, kuko biba bihari kandi ni byinshi.”
^ par. 3 Muri iyi ngingo, amazina amwe n’amwe yarahinduwe.
^ par. 29 Niba wifuza ibindi bisobanuro ku birebana n’iryo sezerano ryo muri Bibiliya rivuga ibyo kugira amagara mazima, reba igice cya 3 mu gitabo Ni iki mu by’ukuri Bibiliya yigisha?, cyanditswe n’Abahamya ba Yehova.
IBAZE UTI . . .
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Ese hari icyo nkora kugira ngo nkomeze kugira ubuzima bwiza, ibyishimo kandi nkorere Imana neza kurushaho?
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Ni ryari mperuka gushimira abandi bana bitewe n’uko bita ku muvandimwe wabo urwaye?