ZVATAURWA naLovemore naRachel zvakamboitikawo kwauri here? Vose vanoda kutaura asi vanogara vachigumburisana. Waona here chinoita kuti vagumburisane?

Matauriro evanhurume neevanhukadzi akasiyana chaizvo, uye zvavanoda zvakasiyanawo. Mukadzi anogona kunge achida kugara achiudza murume wake zviri pamwoyo pake. Ukuwo vanhurume vakawanda vanowanzoda kukurumidza kugadzirisa matambudziko uye havadi kutaura nyaya dzingaguma dzamutsa chimoto. Saka zvoitwa sei kuti ugadzirise dambudziko iri wopedzisira wava kugona kukurukura nemurume wako kana kuti mudzimai wako? Mushonga wacho kuremekedza mumwe wako.

Kuti munhu unzi unoremekedza vamwe hunge uchiedza kuvakoshesa uye uchida kunzwisisa manzwiro avanoita. Kubvira uchikura ungadaro wakadzidza kuremekedza vanhu vakuru kwauri kana kuti vane ruzivo kupfuura rwako. Asi muwanano izvozvo zvakaoma nokuti mose munoita sokuti makaenzana. Linda ava nemakore masere akaroorwa anoti: “Ndaiziva kuti Patrick ainyatsoteerera achiratidza mwoyo murefu nokunzwisisa kana vamwe vanhu vachitaura naye, uye ndozvandaida kuti andiitirewo pandinotaura naye.” Iwe ungadaro uchiteerera uchiratidza mwoyo murefu uye uchitaura zvine ruremekedzo kana uine shamwari dzako kana vamwewo vanhu. Asi ndizvo zvaunoitirawo wawakaroorana naye here?

Kusaremekedzana kunoita kuti mutange kudhonzerana kana kupedzisira musingachataudzani. Mumwe mutongi akachenjera akati: “Zviri nani kuva nechimedu chakaoma chechingwa uine rugare norunyararo pane imba izere namabiko, ine kupesana.” (Zvirevo 17:1, Bhaibheri Dzvene muChiShona Chanhasi) Bhaibheri rinoti  murume anofanira kukudza kana kuti kuremekedza mudzimai wake. (1 Petro 3:7) ‘Mudzimai anofanirawo kuremekedza murume wake kwazvo.’—VaEfeso 5:33.

Mungataurirana sei muchiremekedzana? Chimboonai mamwe mazano anobatsira ari muBhaibheri.

Dambudziko:

Vakawanda vanoda kutaura zvakanyanya kupfuura kuteerera. Iwe ndizvo zvaunoitawo here? Bhaibheri rinoti munhu ‘anopindura nyaya asati ainzwa’ ibenzi. (Zvirevo 18:13) Saka teerera usati wavhura muromo. Zvakanakirei? Sara ava nemakore 26 akaroorwa anoti, “Handifariri kuti murume wangu andidimbudzire ndichiri kutaura obva andiudza kuti ndogadzirisa sei matambudziko angu. Kunyange akatadza hake kunzwisisa kuti dambudziko rabva papi kana kuti akasabvumirana neni, handinyanyi kubatikana nazvo. Chandinongoda ndechokuti anditeerere uye andinzwire tsitsi.”

Ukuwo vamwe varume nevakadzi vanozeza uye havanzwi vakasununguka kana mumwe wavo akavamanikidza kuti vataure manzwiro avari kuita. Lorrie uyo achangoroorwa akaona kuti murume wake haakurumidzi kutaura zvaanenge achifunga. Anoti: “Handimumanikidzi, ndinotomirira kuti iye azotaura paanenge asununguka.”

Zvaungaita:

Kana iwe nemumwe wako mune imwe nyaya yamunoona kuti inogona kupedzisira yamutsa chimoto, tsvagai nguva yamunenge musingamhanyi-mhanyi makadekara henyu. Ko kana mumwe wako asingadi zvokutaura? Unofanira kuziva kuti “pfungwa dzomunhu dzakaita semvura iri mutsime rakadzika, asi munhu akachenjera ndiye achaichera.” (Zvirevo 20:5, Today’s English Version) Pakuchera mvura mutsime ukaita zvokudhonza tambo yacho nokukurumidza mvura yakawanda ichateuka. Ndizvowo zvinogona kuitika kana ukaedza kumanikidza mumwe wako kuti ataure. Achapedzisira atoramba kutaura nyaya yacho, zvoita kuti utadze kuziva zvaanofunga. Mubvunze zvakanaka-naka uye zvine ruremekedzo usingamuvhurumusi, uye kana akasataura zviri pamwoyo pake usakurumidza kugumbuka.

Mumwe wako paanozotaura, ‘chikurumidza kunzwa, unonoke kutaura, unonoke kuva nehasha.’ (Jakobho 1:19) Muteereri akanaka haangoteereri chete asi anoedza kunzwisisa chaita kuti munhu azotaura. Mumwe wako paanotaura, edza kufungidzira kuti ari kunzwa sei. Achazviona kuti uri kumuremekedza here kana kuti kwete nekuteerera kwaunoita.

Jesu akatidzidzisa kuti tingateerera sei. Somuenzaniso mumwe murume airwara paakauya kwaari kuti abatsirwe, Jesu haana kungomhanyira kugadzirisa dambudziko racho. Akatanga ateerera zvaitaurwa nemurume wacho. Zvakataurwa nemurume uyu zvakamubaya mwoyo. Apedza zvose izvi, akazomurapa. (Mako 1:40-42) Ndizvowo zvaunofanira kuita kana mumwe wako achitaura newe. Yeuka kuti ari kungotsvaka munhu wokuturira nhamo dzake kwete kuudzwa kuti dambudziko racho ringagadziriswa sei. Saka nyatsoteerera. Zvifungidzire uriwe. Wapedza kuita izvi wochizotaura. Ukaita izvi ucharatidza kuti unoremekedza mumwe wako.

Dambudziko:

Linda ambotaurwa anoti: “Mitambo inobudiswa paTV yava kuita kuti zviite sokuti hapana chakaipa kuti murume nomudzimai vatukane kana kutaura zvakaipa nezvemumwe wavo kana kuti kumutsvinyira.” Vamwe vanokurira mumhuri inongotaura pfocho pasina kuremekedzana. Pavanozoroora kana kuroorwa zvinovaomera kuti vachisiya katsika aka. Ivy anogara kuCanada anoti, “Ndakakurira mumhuri maiva nevanhu vaingotsvinyirana, kutukana, kunyombana, vasingambooni chakaipa nazvo.”

Zvaungaita:

Paunenge uchitaura nevamwe nezvewawakaroorana naye, taura “shoko chero  ripi zvaro rakanaka, kuti rivake sezvingava zvichidiwa, kuti ripe zvinofadza kune vanonzwa.” (VaEfeso 4:29) Matauriro aunoita nezvemumwe wako ngaaite kuti vamwe vamuremekedze.

Kunyange pamunenge muri moga nemumwe wako, rega kumutsvinyira kana kumunemera. Kare muIsraeri, mudzimai waMambo Dhavhidhi, Mikari akambogumbukira murume wake. Akataura zvokutsvinya achimuti aita “sebenzi.” Zvaakataura zvakagumbura Dhavhidhi uyewo Mwari haana kufara nazvo. (2 Samueri 6:20-23) Chii chatinodzidza apa? Paunotaura nemumwe wako, tanga wanyatsofunga. (VaKorose 4:6) Patrick ava nemakore masere akaroora asi anobvuma kuti iye nomudzimai wake vanombopesana pane zvimwe zvinhu. Akaona kuti dzimwe nguva zvaanotaura zvinotowedzera moto. “Ndakazoona kuti zvokuda kuti haivhiyiwi hapana kwazvinotisvitsa. Kuumbiridza ukama hwangu nemumwe wangu ndokunoita kuti tigutsikane uye kunobatsira.”

Kare kare imwe chirikadzi yakanga yakwegura yakakurudzira varoora vayo kuti ‘vawane nzvimbo yokuzororera mumwe nomumwe muimba yomurume wake.’ (Rute 1:9) Murume nomudzimai pavanoremekedzana vanoita kuti imba yavo ive “nzvimbo yokuzororera.”

Dambudziko:

Vamwe vachangoroorana vakarasika pavakafunga kuti Bhaibheri parinotaura kuti “nyama imwe” rinenge richireva kuti murume nomukadzi vachange vachipindirana pane zvose, kunyange unhu. (Mateu 19:5) Asi vanozoona kuti mafungiro akadaro ihope dzechembere kurota ichiyamwa. Kana vava nenguva varoorana, mafungiro akasiyana avanoita anowanzoita kuti vatange kupopotedzana. Linda anoti: “Ini naPatrick takanyanya kusiyana pakuti kana paitika chinhu iye haanyanyi kunetseka sezvandinoita. Dzimwe nguva pandinenge ndichinetseka iye anotodekara zvake sokunge kuti hapana chiripo zvokuti ndinopedzisira ndagumbuka nokuti ndinenge ndichiona sokuti haana hanya nezviri kuitika kwandiri.”

Zvaungaita:

Ziva kuti mumwe wako akasiyana newe uye hapana zvaungaita kuti umuchinje. Somuenzaniso, maziso ako anoshanda zvakasiyana nezvinoita nzeve, asi zvose zvinoshanda pamwe chete kuti uyambuke zvakanaka mugwagwa une motokari dzakawanda. Adrienne ane makore ava kusvika 30 akaroorwa anoti: “Chero bedzi zvatinofunga zvisingapesani nezvinotaurwa muShoko raMwari, hapana chakaipa kana ini nomurume wangu tikasabvumirana pane chimwe chinhu. Takaroorana asi tiri vanhu vakasiyana.”

Kana mumwe wako ane mafungiro akasiyana neako, chirega kuti takarasima nezvaunoda. Fungawo zvinodiwa nemumwe wako. (VaFiripi 2:4) Kyle murume waAdrienne anoti: “Kazhinji handiwirirani nezvinenge zvichitaurwa nemudzimai wangu uye handizvinzwisisi. Asi ndinozviyeuchidza kuti ndinoda mudzimai wangu kupfuura zvido zvangu. Kufara kwake kufara kwanguwo.”

Chimwe chinoita kuti imba yenyu itsvuke chin’ai uye mugare muchifara, kuremekedzana. Linda anoti: “Kuremekedzana kunoita kuti unzwe wakadekara uye pasina chokutyira. Kuremekedza mumwe wako kushandira zviripo.”