“Ndililemene Kwacecino Ciindi Pele Kutali Kukabe Kutamani”

Akaluulwa aba Sara van der Monde

Kanji-kanji bantu bandaambila kuti “Sara, lyoonse ulamweta-mweta. Ncinzi cikupa kukkomana lyoonse?” Ndibaambila kuti ndijisi bulangizi bulibedelede. Bulangizi oobu bulipandulwidwe mumajwi aakuti: “Ndililemene kwacecino ciindi, pele kutali kukabe kutamani.”

NDAKAZYALWA mu 1974, mudolopo lya Paris ku France. Bamaama bakapenga kapati nobakali kutumbuka, mukuya kwaciindi bakandijana abulwazi bwa kutabeleka kabotu kwacibeela cimwi cabongo (cerebral palsy). Ndakajisi penzi lyakulebuka maanza amaulu, alimwi nzyondakali kwaamba tiizyakali kulimvwisya. Kuyungizya waawo ndakaba abulwazi bwamafwa alimwi ndakali kuciswa-ciswa.

Ciindi nindakajisi myaka yobilo yakuzyalwa, mukwasyi wesu wakalongela kudolopo lya Melbourne ku Australia. Kumane nikwakainda myaka yobilo bataata bakatutija mebo abamaama. Eeci nceciindi cakusaanguna nindakalimvwa kuyandwa a Leza. Bamaama ibakali Kamboni wa Jehova bakali kunditolelezya kumiswaangano ya Bunakristo kwalo nkondakaiya kuti Leza ulandiyanda alimwi ulandibikkila maano. Akaambo kaluzyibo oolu alimwi aluyando lwabamaama lwakandigwasya kuti ndicileke kulibilika nokuba kuti bukkale bwesu bwakalicincide.

Kunze lyaboobo, bamaama bakandiyiisya kupaila kuli Jehova. Kwaamba masimpe ndajana kuti kupaila ncuubauba kwiinda kwaambaula. Ciindi nendipaila tandiyandiki kupozya buya jwi, nokuba boobo inga “ndilizimvwide” kabotu-kabotu nzyondaamba mumoyo. Nokuba kuti nzyondaamba tazilimvwisyi, cilandikulwaizya kuzyiba kuti Jehova ulazimvwa zyoonse, kufwumbwa naa ndipaila mukaumuumu naa ndaamba zitalimvwisyi.—Int. 65:2.

Kuliyumya Kuzyintu Zityompya

Ciindi nindakajisi myaka yakuzyalwa yosanwe, bulwazi bwangu bwa kutabeleka kabotu kwacibeela cimwi cabongo bwakaindila cakunga ndakali kuyandika kubelesya zibbusu zyabalema kutegwa ndicikonzye kweenda. Ndakali kunzenzeleka kapati, kweenda kwakali kundikatazya. Ciindi nindakajisi myaaka iili 11 yakuzyalwa, ndakacileka kweenda. Mukuya kwaciindi, cakali kundaalila kutanta akubuka abulo endikke kakunyina kubelesya kancini kakali kubelesya magesi kundinyamuna kuzwa akacinga kabalema kabelesya magesi nkondakali kweenzya kwiinda mukubelesya maanza.

Kwaamba masimpe zimwi ziindi ndilatyompwa. Pele kuyeeya mbaakani yamukwasyi wesu yakuti: “Utalibiliki azyintu nzyotakonzyi kucita, kocita buyo zyintu nzyokonzya kucita,” kwandigwasya kuliyumya mumapenzi  aasiyene-siyene. Ndilacibelesya cipego cangu kwiinda mukupenta, kusuma akuluka zisani akuzibikka madeekko alimwi akubumba zyintu abulongo.

Akaambo kabulema bwangu, bamwi cilabagambya mbondakacikonzya kusala kukomba Leza. Kandijisi myaka iili 18 yakuzyalwa, bayi bangu bakandikulwaizya kuti ndizwe aŋanda kutegwa nditanjili cikombelo cabamaama. Bayi bangu bakalisungula kuti balakonzya kundijanina aakukkala. Pele nokuba boobo, ndakabaambila bayi bangu kuti kunyina nindiyooleka kusyoma nzyondakaiya alimwi akuti aŋanda ndiyoozwa lilikke buyo kuti ndeelela kulilela.

Kwakainda buyo ciindi cisyoonto nondakali kubandika abayi bangu, ndakabbapatizyigwa akuba Kamboni wa Jehova. Nokwakainda myaka yobilo, ndakalongela mukaanda kamwi kubusena nkukwenya ooku. Kubusena ooku ndilikkomene akaambo kalugwasyo alimwi alwaanguluko.

Ndakayandwa a Muntu Ngondatakali Kuyeeyela

Mumyaka yainda, ndajana masunko aambi. Bumwi buzuba ndakagambwa kapati ciindi musankwa ngotwakali kwiiya limwi iwakali mulema awalo wakandilomba kuti tukwatane. Mbubwenya mbuli basimbi banji, andime ndilayanda kukwatwa. Nokuba boobo, kukwatwa kumuntu uulemene mbuli ndime tacaambi kuti tunookkomene mucikwati. Kuyungizya waawo, musankwa ooyu tanaakali Kamboni. Nzyotusyoma, nzyotucita alimwi ambaakani zyakaliindene kapati. Aboobo, mbuti mbotukonzya kupona limwi? Alimwi ndakali kuyanda kutobela mulawo wa Leza wakukwatwa buyo kumusyomima. (1 Ko. 7:39) Aboobo, cabulemu ndakamukaka.

Noliba lino ndilizyi kuti ndakasala kabotu. Alimwi tandidooneki kuti ndiyookkomana munyika ya Leza mpya. (Int. 145:16; 2 Pe. 3:13) Kwacecino ciindi ndikanzide kuzumanana kusyomeka kuli Jehova alimwi akukkutila kweelana abukkale bwangu.

Ndilangila buzuba nendiyooleka kubelesya kacinga kabalema akuzuza mbuli muwo. Aboobo, ndiyooamba kuti: “Ndakalilemene, pele lino ndili kabotu—kukabe kutamani.”