THINGS WEY FIT HELP FAMILY | HOW TO CARE FOR CHILDREN
Teach Your Pikin Make E No Quick Tire When Things Hard for-Am
Your pikin de cry and e talk say, “I no go fit do-am, e too hard!” “I no go fit ever sabi do-am!” E want quick-quick stop to do something wey de hard-am. You no like to see say your pikin de struggle, but you want make e learn how to endure when things hard. E good make you rush to help-am? You go allow-am just stop wetin e de do because e hard for-am? Or you go teach your pikin make e no quick tire when things hard for-am?
Wetin you need to know
E dey important make person no de quick tire when things hard. If papa and mama teach their pikin to de work hard, that one go help-am sabi things, and this one fit still help-am do well for school, de happy, no de sick so-so sick, and enjoy better friendship with people. But when papa and mama no allow their pikin face hard condition, this one fit affect how them de think and feel. And when them don grow, them fit de feel say them dey useless and them fit no live good life.
No de quick tire when things hard. Every young person fit make up im mind say e no go quick tire and give up when things hard, and do im best to solve im problem. People wey de do research don see say children wey dey one year and three months go do their best to succeed when things hard, if them don first watch as mature person do im best to succeed when things hard.
“I remember when I de teach my children wey be girls how to tie their shoe lace. No be wetin person fit learn for one day. Every time wey them want tie their shoe lace, them go sitdown for like 10 to 15 minutes de struggle with-am. After some time, I go come help them. E take them some months to fit sabi-am, and before them learn-am, sometimes them go tire and start to cry, but last-last them come sabi-am. I for make things easy for myself if to say I just buy them shoe wey no get lace. But sometimes, if papa and mama want fit teach their children say make them no de quick tire when things hard, even them need to show say them no de quick tire when things hard for them.”—Colleen.
Papa and mama fit make their children quick tire when things hard for them. Some papa and mama fit no know say things wey them de do de make-am easy for their children to quick tire when things hard for them. How? This one fit happen when them de rush to help their children when things de hard for them. Them de do this one so that the pikin no go de see imself as person wey don fail. But this one fit affect the pikin for bad way. One woman wey im name na Jessica Lahey write say: “Anytime wey we no allow . . . our children do things by theirself even when e hard them, we de show say: them no get sense for the work, them no go fit do-am, and say we no trust them.” a This one fit make children quick tire to do their best when problem come for future, and de feel say them need mature person to come help them.
Instead to help your pikin do something wey de hard-am, you fit teach-am say e dey important make e no de quick tire
Wetin you fit do
Encourage your pikin to de work hard. Papa and mama fit help their children to do their best make them no de quick tire when things hard for them. Them fit do this one when them de give them work wey fit their age. For example, children wey dey between three to five years, fit learn how to de wash cloth and how to keep their toy well after them use-am play finish. Young children fit help arrange things wey their mama buy come from market, arrange dining table, pack plate after them don chop finish, troway dirty for dustbin, and clean wetin pour for ground. Young people wey dey between 13 to 19 years fit do work wey hard small like to clean house, care for things make them no spoil, and repair things wey spoil. Children fit no like to do house work, but them de gain when their papa and mama de give them house work make them do from when them small. How them take de gain? E de help them fit get the kind mind wey them need to do hard work when them don grow.
Bible advice: “Gain dey for all kind of hard work.”—Proverbs 14:23.
“No give your children work just because you want make them dey busy. Nobody de like that kind thing. But give them something to do wey them fit learn from. If na small pikin you get, give-am work to clean things wey im hand fit reach. If you de wash motor, allow-am wash the part wey dey down wey fit hard for you to bend down wash. And no waste time to thank-am for the work wey e do.”—Chris.
Show your pikin wetin e need to do when the work de hard-am. Sometimes, children de quick tire when them no know how to complete work wey them de do. So when you de teach your pikin something wey e never do before, see somethings wey you fit do. The first thing na to do the work and allow your pikin make e de watch you. Then make una do-am together. The next thing na to watch your pikin as e de do the work and de give-am advice wey fit help-am. Finally, allow your pikin do the work by imself and finish-am.
Bible advice: “I don show una example, so that just as I do for una, una go do like that too.”—John 13:15.
“From wetin I don see, papa and mama need to be good example if them want make their children no de quick tire when things hard for them. Papa and mama need to show their children the kind character wey them want make their children get.”—Doug.
Help your children understand say everybody de struggle and fail sometimes. Tell them how you struggle with something wey you de do, and how you gain as you no tire and run leave the work. Explain to them say e dey normal for wetin them never do before to hard them to do. And say them fit learn from their mistake. Let them know say even if them make mistake, you still love them. Just as muscle de grow and strong more-more as person de use-am, na so e go still be for your pikin, e no go quick de tire if you allow-am face problem. So when something de hard your pikin, no just jump go help-am, allow-am make e continue to try im best even if e no easy for-am. One book wey the name na, How Children Succeed talk say: “The best way for young person to learn better character, na for-am to try to do something even though say e dey clear say e fit no succeed.”
Bible advice: “When we dey young, e good make we de struggle to do our best.”—Lamentations 3:27, Contemporary English Version.
“Children de gain when their papa and mama allow them to continue to try for some time to do something wey hard, and when them still know say their mama and papa dey to direct them. After some time, them go succeed and sabi how to do the thing, and them go know why e dey important make them no de quick tire.”—Jordan.
Praise your pikin for wetin e do, no be because e too sabi something. For example, instead to talk say, “Well done for the way you pass your exam! You too know book,” you fit talk say, “Well done for the way you pass your exam! I really like the way you take read for the exam.” Why e dey important for papa and mama to praise their pikin for wetin them do, instead to praise them say them too sabi something? Dr. Carol Dweck talk say, ‘To de praise children say them too sabi something, fit make them doubt theirself when them jam something wey hard for them or when things no go well. The best thing wey papa and mama fit do for their children na to teach them to work hard, to enjoy their work, look for new ways to do things, no de fear mistake, and continue to de learn. If them do this one, e go help the children still de happy even if people no praise them for wetin them do.’ b
Bible advice: “Praise de help us know who person really be.”—Proverbs 27:21.