Isahluko 31

Ndinokuhlangabezana Njani Nentlungu Yokwahlukana?

“Besithandana kangangeenyanga ezintandathu yaye besingabahlobo kangangeminyaka emihlanu. Xa wayefuna sahlukane, akazange akwazi nokundijonga. Wayeka ukuthetha nam. Ndaziva ndingento yanto. Andikwazi nokuyichaza indlela endandiphoxeke ngayo. Ndandizibuza, ‘Ndenze ntoni?’”—URachel.

 UKWAHLUKANA nomntu othandana naye kunokukushiya usentlungwini. Cinga ngoJeff noSusan, ababethandana kangangeminyaka emibini. Kuloo minyaka baya bethandana ngakumbi. Ebudeni bemini, uJeff wayebhalela uSusan amazwi othando ngefowuni. Ngamaxesha athile, wayemthumelela izipho emqinisekisa ukuba usoloko ecinga ngaye. USusan uthi: “UJeff wayendiphulaphula yaye sasivana gqitha. Wayendenza ndizive ndikhethekile.”

Kungabanga thuba lide, uJeff noSusan babethetha ngokutshata nalapho baza kuhlala khona njengendoda nomfazi. UJeff wada wafuna ukwazi umsesane ongalingana uSusan. Kodwa, ngequbuliso, wahlukana naye! USusan waba buhlungu gqitha. Nangona wazama ukuqhubeka nobomi bakhe, wayesakhathazekile. Uthi: “Ndandisoloko ndidiniwe emzimbeni nasengqondweni.” a

Isizathu Sokukhathazeka

Ukuba imeko yakho iyafana nekaSusan, usenokuzibuza, ‘Ngaba linokuze liphole eli nxeba?’ Siyaqondakala isizathu sokuba ube buhlungu kangaka. UKumkani uSolomon wathi: “Uthando lunamandla njengokufa.” (INgoma yazo iiNgoma 8:6) Kunokwenzeka ukuba ukwahlukana nomntu omthandayo yeyona nto ibuhlungu yakha yakwehlela. Enyanisweni, abanye bathi ukwahlukana kufana nokufelwa. Usenokuzibona usenza ezi zinto zingezantsi nezinye izinto ezenziwa ngumntu ofelweyo.

Ukuphika. ‘Akunakwenzeka ukuba kuphelile ngathi. Kungekudala uza kutshintsha ingqondo.’

Ukuba nomsindo. ‘Angayenza njani into enje kum? Andifuni nokumbona!’

 Ukudandatheka. ‘Andithandwa. Akakho umntu onokuze andithande.’

Ukuyamkela loo meko. ‘Ndiza kuba bhetele. Ukwahlukana kubuhlungu, kodwa ndiza kuchacha.’

Okuvuyisayo kukuba, ekugqibeleni uza kude uyamkele le meko. Ixesha oza kulithabatha ukuze uyamkele liya kuxhomekeka kwizinto eziliqela, kuquka ixesha enilichithe nithandana. Okwangoku, unokuhlangabezana njani nale ntlungu?

Ukuqhubeka Nobomi

Abanye abantu badla ngokuthi, inxeba liya liphola njengoko ixesha lihamba. Xa nisandul’ ukwahlukana, loo mazwi asenokungaginyeki ncam. Kungenxa yokuba ukuphola kufuna ixesha. Ngokomzekelo, inxeba elisemzimbeni liyaphola ekuhambeni kwexesha, kodwa okwangoku libuhlungu. Kufuneka unqande ukopha uze uphelise intlungu. Kufuneka elo nxeba lingangenwa ziintsholongwane. Oko kuyinyaniso naxa wenzakele ngaphakathi. Okwangoku, kubuhlungu. Kodwa  ikho into onokuyenza ukuze unciphise intlungu uze ungabi nengqumbo. Ngokuhamba kwexesha uza kuphola, kodwa yintoni omele uyenze? Zama oku kulandelayo.

● Xa ufuna ukulila, lila. Akukho nto iphosakeleyo ngokulila. Ngapha koko, iBhayibhile ithi, kukho “ixesha lokulila” “nexesha lokwenza isijwili.” (INtshumayeli 3:1, 4) Ukulila akuthethi kuthi ubuthathaka. Xa uDavide wayesentlungwini—nangona wayeligorha elikhaliphileyo—wathi: “Ubusuku bonke ndiyasidadisa isingqengqelo sam; umandlalo wam ndiwenza uphuphume iinyembezi zam.”—INdumiso 6:6.

● Nyamekela impilo yakho. Ukuzilolonga nokutya okusempilweni kuya kukunika amandla kweli xesha lentlungu. IBhayibhile ithi: “Ingqeqesho yomzimba iyingenelo kancinane.”—1 Timoti 4:8.

Ziziphi iingxaki zempilo onokunikela ingqalelo kuzo?

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● Zigcine uxakekile. Ungayeki ukwenza izinto onomdla kuzo. Musa ukuzahlula. (IMizekeliso 18:1) Ukunxulumana nabo bakukhathaleleyo kunokukunceda ucinge ngezinto ezakhayo.

Unokuzibekela luphi usukelo?

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 ● Mchazele uThixo indlela ovakalelwa ngayo. Oku kunokuba nzima. Emva kokwahlukana, abanye baziva belahlwe nanguThixo. Baqiqa ngelithi, ‘Bendisoloko ndithandazela iqabane, kodwa jonga ngoku!’ (INdumiso 10:1) Ngaba kufanelekile ukulindela ukuba uThixo afunele abantu amaqabane? Ngokuqinisekileyo akunjalo, yaye akanakubekek’ ityala xa omnye wenu efuna nahlukane. Naku esikwaziyo ngoYehova: ‘Usikhathalele.’ (1 Petros 5:7) Ngoko mchazele indlela ovakalelwa ngayo. IBhayibhile ithi: “Zaziseni izibongozo zenu kuThixo ngomthandazo nesikhungo nombulelo; yaye uxolo lukaThixo olungaphaya kokuqonda luya kuzilinda iintliziyo zenu namandla enu engqondo ngoKristu Yesu.”—Filipi 4:6, 7.

Ziziphi izinto onokuzithandazela ngokungqalileyo kuYehova ngoxa usentlungwini yokwahlukana?

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 Cinga Ngekamva

Emva kokuhlangabezana naloo ntlungu, jonga ngemva uze ucinge ngezinto ezibangele ukuba nahlukane. Xa sele ukulungele oko, uya kufumanisa kuluncedo ukubhala phantsi iimpendulo zemibuzo ekwibhokisi ethi “Ukwahlukana Kunokundifundisa Ntoni?” kwiphepha 224.

Liyinyaniso elokuba, izinto azikhange zihambe kakuhle. Kodwa khumbula oku: Ebudeni besaqhwithi, ubona nje isibhakabhaka esimnyama nemvula. Kodwa ke, ekugqibeleni imvula iyaphela size isibhakabhaka sityhileke. Ekuhambeni kwexesha ulutsha olucatshulwe ngaphambili kwesi sahluko, luye lwaqhubeka nobomi balo. Qiniseka ukuba oku kunokwenzeka nakuwe!

KWISAHLUKO ESILANDELAYO

Yintoni onokuyenza ukuze uzikhusele kubantu abaxhaphaza abanye ngokwesini?

[Umbhalo osemazantsi]

IZIBHALO EZIBALASELISA

“[UYehova] uyabaphilisa abo baphuke intliziyo, uyazibopha iindawo zabo ezibuhlungu.”—INdumiso 147:3.

ICEBISO

USusan, okhankanywe ngaphambilana kwesi sahluko, wazibhalela uluhlu lwezibhalo, awayesoloko ehamba nalo nawayezifunda nanini na xa edandathekile. Mhlawumbi nawe ungazenzela olwakho uluhlu ngezibhalo ezikwesi sahluko.

NGABA UBUSAZI . . . ?

Inkoliso yabo bathandana bekwishumi elivisayo ayide itshate, nabo batshatayo, uninzi lwabo luyawuqhawula umtshato.

OKO NDICEBA UKUKWENZA!

Ukuze ndikwazi ukuqhubeka nobomi bam emva kokuba sahlukene, ndiza ․․․․․

Oko ndimele ndikuphucule xa ndiphinde ndathandana nomnye umntu ․․․․․

Oko ndifuna ukukubuza abazali bam ngalo mba ․․․․․

UCINGA NTONI?

● Yintoni oyifundileyo ngawe ngoxa ubuthandana?

● Yintoni oyifundileyo ngomntu wesini esahlukileyo?

[Amagama acatshulweyo akwiphepha 227]

“Ngokuhamba kwexesha ingqondo isebenza kakuhle. Akusalawulwa ziimvakalelo, ngoko uyakwazi ukucinga ngemeko okuyo uze uyamkele. Kwakhona, unokutsho uzazi wena kwanomntu obungathanda ukuba abe liqabane lakho, noko umele ukulumkele ukuze uphephe imeko efanayo kwixa elizayo.”—UCorrina

 [Ibhokisi ekwiphepha 224]

Isalathiso Samaphepha

Ukwahlukana Kunokundifundisa Ntoni?

Ngaba uye wakuchazela isizathu sokuba nahlukane? Ukuba kunjalo, bhala isizathu, kungakhathaliseki ukuba eso sisizathu esivakalayo okanye akunjalo. ․․․․․

Ziziphi ezinye izizathu ocinga ukuba zibangele oko? ․․․․․

Xa ucinga ngoko kwenzekileyo, ngaba ikho into owawumele ukuba uyenzile? Ukuba kunjalo, yintoni? ․․․․․

Ngaba oku kukubonise ukuba kusafuneka ukhule yaye uqole ngokomoya? ․․․․․

Ukuba uphinde wathandana, unokuyitshintsha njani indlela obuzenza ngayo izinto? ․․․․․

[Umfanekiso okwiphepha 223]

Ukwahlukana nomntu othandana naye kufana nenxeba elibuhlungu eliye liphole ekuhambeni kwexesha