Isahluko 24

Ngaba Iintlobano Zesini Zinokusenza Sithandane Ngakumbi?

Ziinyanga nje ezimbini uHeather noMike bethandana, kodwa kuHeather ingathi kudala besazana. Babhalelana ngeeselfowuni, bancokola ixesha elide efowunini yaye batheth’ intw’ evanayo. Kodwa ngoku, njengoko bemise imoto ebusuku, uMike uqalisa ukugabadela.

Kwezi nyanga zimbini zidluleyo, uMike noHeather bebebambana nje ngezandla baze baphuzane. UHeather ebefuna nje kuphelele apho. Kodwa kwangaxeshanye akafuni ukwahlukana noMike. Xa ekunye naye uzibona eyimbelukazi yaye ebalulekile. Uthi: ‘SinoMike siyathandana . . . ’

 MHLAWUMBI unokuyithelekelela into okuza kuphelela kuyo oku. Kodwa usenokungayiqondi indlela ezinokonakala ngayo izinto emva kokuba uMike noHeather belele kunye. Khawucinge ngoku:

Ukuba akuwuthobeli umthetho wendalo, njengomthetho womxhuzulane, uya kuyifumana imiphumo yoko. Kwenzeka okufanayo naxa ungawuthobeli umthetho wendlela ofanele uziphathe ngayo, njengalo uthi: “Nikhwebuke kuhenyuzo.” (1 Tesalonika 4:3) Iba yintoni imiphumo yokungathobeli loo mthetho? IBhayibhile ithi: “Lowo uqhelisela uhenyuzo wona nxamnye nomzimba wakhe.” (1 Korinte 6:18) Ayinyaniso kangakanani la mazwi?  Bhala imiphumo emithathu eyingozi ebangelwa kukulala nomntu ongatshatanga naye.

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Ngoku, khawukhe uhlole oko ukubhalileyo. Ngaba uzibhalile izinto ezinjengezifo ezidluliselwa ngeentlobano zesini, ukukhulelwa okungacetywanga okanye ukona uThixo? Ngokuqinisekileyo le yimiphumo ebuhlungu enokufunyanwa nguye nabani na ongawuthobeliyo umthetho kaThixo ophathelele uhenyuzo.

Sekunjalo, usenokuhendeka. Usenokuthi, ‘Akukho nto inokwenzeka kum.’ Ngapha koko, wonke umntu uba neentlobano zesini. Oontanga bakho esikolweni baqhayisa ngokulala nabantu babo yaye ayibakhathazi loo nto. Mhlawumbi njengoHeather ekuthethwe ngaye ekuqaleni, nawe ucinga ukuba ukulala nomntu othandana naye kuya kunenza nithandane ngakumbi. Ukongezelela, ngubani ofuna ukuba kuhlekiswe ngaye kuba enyulu? Ngaba akukho bhetele ukuba nawe uncame ubunyulu bakho?

Ungakhawulezi ugqibe ngolo hlobo. Okokuqala, asinguye wonke umntu oba neentlobano zesini. Enyanisweni, usenokufunda inkcazelo ethetha ngolutsha oluninzi oluba neentlobano zesini. Ngokomzekelo, ingxelo yaseUnited States idiza ukuba abantwana aba-2 kwaba-3, bathi begqiba nje kwisikolo samabanga aphakamileyo babe sele bekhe baba neentlobano zesini. Kodwa oko kuthetha ukuba baliqela abantwana abangabi nazo iintlobano zesini kuba ngumntwana omnye kwabathathu ongazange abe nazo. Ngoko ke, kuthekani ngabo bakhe baba nazo? Abaphengululi baye bafumanisa ukuba ulutsha oluninzi olwakha lwaba neentlobano zesini luye lwehlelwa yenye yezi zinto zibuhlungu zilandelayo.

 INTO EBUHLUNGU ENOKUKWEHLELA 1 UKUXINEZELEKA. Ulutsha oluninzi oluye lwaba neentlobano zesini ngaphambi komtshato luye lwazisola emva koko.

INTO EBUHLUNGU ENOKUKWEHLELA 2 UKUNGATHEMBANI. Emva kokuba inkwenkwe ilele nentombazana, ngamnye kubo uye azibuze, ‘Ngubani omnye akhe walala naye?’

INTO EBUHLUNGU ENOKUKWEHLELA 3 UKUDANA. Amantombazana ebenokufuna ukuthandana nomntu oza kuwakhusela kungekhona oza kudlala ngawo. Abafana abaninzi baye baphelelwe ngumdla kwintombazana evuma lula xa befuna ukulala nayo.

Ukongezelela koku kungasentla, abafana abaninzi bathi abasoze batshate nentombazana abakhe balala nayo. Yintoni ebangela loo nto? Kungenxa yokuba bafuna intombazana enyulu.

Ukuba uyintombazana, ngaba kuyakothusa oku—mhlawumbi kude kukucaphukise? Ngoko khumbula: Imiphumo yokuba neentlobano zesini ngaphambi komtshato yahlukile koko kuboniswa kwiimovie nakumabonwakude. Abezolonwabo babalaselisa ubumnandi beentlobano zesini kwabakwishumi elivisayo baze bakwenze kubonakale ngathi akuyongozi yaye luthando lokwenene. Kodwa ungalahlekiswa! Umntu okucengela ukuba ulale naye ningatshatanga wenzela nje iingenelo zakhe. (1 Korinte 13:4, 5) Ngapha koko, ngaba umntu okuthanda ngokwenene angayibeka esichengeni ngolo hlobo impilo yakho neemvakalelo zakho? (IMizekeliso 5:3, 4)  Ngaba umntu okukhathalele ngokwenene angakulingela ekubeni wonakalise ulwalamano lwakho noThixo?—Hebhere 13:4.

Ukuba ungumfana othandanayo, oko kubhalwe kwesi sahluko kufanele kukwenze uhlolisise ulwalamano onalo nomntu othandana naye. Zibuze, ‘Ngaba ndiyikhathalele ngokwenene intombi endithandana nayo?’ Ukuba kunjalo, unokukubonisa njani oku? Ngokubambelela ngokuqinileyo kwimithetho kaThixo, ngokuba nobulumko bokuphepha iimeko ezilingayo, nokumthanda ngendlela yokuba unganyanzelisi ukwenza izinto ezifunwa nguwe kuphela. Ukuba uneempawu ezinjalo, kusenokwenzeka ukuba loo ntombi uthandana nayo ivakalelwe ngendlela efanayo neyomShulami owayeziphethe kakuhle owathi: “Isithandwa sam sesam yaye nam ndingowaso.” (INgoma yazo  iiNgoma 2:16) Ngamany’ amazwi, uya kumzuza.

Enoba uyinkwenkwe okanye intombazana, ukuba uyanikezela ekubeni neentlobano zesini ngaphambi komtshato, uzithob’ isidima ngokuncama eyona nto ixabisekileyo. (Roma 1:24) Yiloo nto ebangela ukuba abantu abaninzi bazive bengento yanto yaye bephelelwe sisidima, ngokungathi baphise ngeyona nto ixabisekileyo! Musa ukukuvumela ukuba kwenzeke kuwe oko. Ukuba umntu othile ukucengela ukuba ulale naye esithi, “Ukuba uyandithanda, masilale,” phendula ngesibindi uthi, “Ukuba nawe uyandithanda, ubungasoze uthi mandilale nawe!”

Umzimba wakho uxabiseke gqitha ukuba ungasuke nje uphise ngawo. Zibonakalise ukuba uzimisele ukuthobela umthetho kaThixo wokukhwebuka kuhenyuzo. Ngenye imini nawe uya kutshata uze ube neentlobano zesini. Uya kuzinandipha ungenaxhala loko kuya kwenzeka kamva, nto leyo edla ngokwehlela abantu ababa neentlobano zesini bengatshatanga.—IMizekeliso 7:22, 23; 1 Korinte 7:3.

FUNDA OKUNGAKUMBI NGALO MBANDELA KUMQULU 2, ISAHLUKO 4 NESESI-5

KWISAHLUKO ESILANDELAYO

Kuphosakele kangakanani ukuphulula amalungu esini?

IZIBHALO EZIBALASELISA

“Sabani kulo uhenyuzo. . . . Lowo uqhelisela uhenyuzo wona nxamnye nomzimba wakhe.”—1 Korinte 6:18.

ICEBISO

Kumbandela wendlela oziphatha ngayo nomntu wesini esahlukileyo, nanku umgaqo obalulekileyo: Ukuba wenza into ongafuniyo abazali bakho bakubone uyenza, loo nto ithetha ukuba akumele uyenze.

NGABA UBUSAZI . . . ?

Emva kokuba inkwenkwe ilele nentombazana, isenokuyilahla iye kukhangela enye.

OKO NDICEBA UKUKWENZA!

Xa ndihleli nomntu wesini esahlukileyo, ndimele ndiphephe oku ․․․․․

Ukuba umntu wesini esahlukileyo ufuna ukundibona kwindawo esitheleyo, ndiza kuthi ․․․․․

Oko ndifuna ukukubuza abazali bam ngalo mba ․․․․․

UCINGA NTONI?

● Nangona ukungafezeki kunokukubangela ube nomqweno wokuba neentlobano zesini ngaphambi komtshato, kutheni kuphosakele?

● Yintoni oza kuyenza ukuba umntu ufuna ukulala nawe?

[Amagama acatshulweyo akwiphepha 176]

“NjengomKristu, uneempawu eziya kwenza abanye abantu bakuthande. Ngenxa yoko, umele ulumke uze ukhabe ngaw’ omane xa umntu efuna ukuba uziphathe kakubi. Umele uzixabise iimpawu onazo. Ungavumi ukuphulukana nazo!”—UJoshua

[Umfanekiso okwiphepha 176, 177]

Ukuba neentlobano zesini ngaphambi komtshato kufana nokuthatha umzobo omhle uwenze imethi yokosula iinyawo