Ungasinqoba Isizungu

NGUBANI ongathi akakaze abuzwe ubuhlungu obubangelwa isizungu? Ziningi izinto ezingasenza sizizwe sinesizungu. Okubuhlungu nakakhulu kodwa, kungaba isizungu sabesifazane abangakaze bashade, noma abashonelwe, noma abahlukanisile.

Ngokwesibonelo, intokazi engumKristu ebizwa ngokuthi uFrances iyalandisa: “Lapho sengineminyaka engu-23, kwacaca ukuthi abangane bami bonke base beshadile, futhi ngangisele ngedwa.” * Umuzwa wokuba umtshingo ubethwa ngubani ungase ukhule njengoba iminyaka ihamba namathuba okushada eya encipha. “Kwakungeyona inhloso yami ukuhlala ngingashadile, ngisengathanda ukushada uma ithuba livela,” kuvuma uSandra, manje osevile eminyakeni engu-40. U-Angela, oneminyaka engaphezu kuka-50, uyaphawula: “Angizange ngenze isinqumo esiwujuqu sokuba ngihlale ngingashadile, kodwa yilokho okwenzekile. Babembalwa kakhulu abazalwane endaweni engangabelwe kuyo njengephayona elikhethekile.”

Kuyatuseka ukuthi iningi labesifazane abangamaKristu likhetha ukungashadi ngoba lisilalela ngobuqotho iseluleko sikaJehova sokushada “kuphela eNkosini.” (1 Korinte 7:39) Kwabanye kulula ukuhlala bengashadile, kodwa abanye bathola ukuthi isifiso sokushada nokuba nabantwana siyakhula njengoba iminyaka ihamba. “Ngenxa yokungabi nomngane womshado, ngihlale ngizizwa nginganelisekile ngokomzwelo,” kuvuma uSandra.

Ezinye izici ezinjengokunakekela abazali asebekhulile, zingawenza ube mandla nakakhulu lo muzwa wesizungu. “Njengoba ngingashadile, umkhaya wakithi ubulokhu ulindela ukuba kube yimina enginakekela abazali bethu asebekhulile,” kusho uSandra. “Yimina engathwala ingxenye enkulu yalo mthwalo iminyaka engu-20, nakuba singabantwana abayisithupha sesisonke. Ukuphila kwakuyoba lula kakhulu ukube nganginomyeni ozongisekela.”

UFrances uveza okunye okumbangela isizungu nakakhulu. Uyalandisa: “Ngesinye isikhathi abantu bangibuza ngokuqondile, ‘Awushadile ngani?’ Umbuzo onjalo ungenza ngibe nomuzwa wokuthi ukungashadi kwami kuyiphutha lami ngandlela-thile. Cishe kuyo yonke imishado engiya kuyo, othile ungibuza lo mbuzo ongathandeki, ‘Kanti uzoshada nini wena?’ Ngiye ngiqale ukucabanga, ‘Uma abazalwane abangokomoya bengenaso isithakazelo kimi, kungenzeka ukuthi anginazo izimfanelo zobuKristu ezidingekayo noma mhlawumbe nje angikhangi.’”

Imizwa yokuba umtshingo ubethwa ngubani neyesizungu inganqotshwa kanjani? Yini abanye abangayenza, uma ikhona, ukuze basize?

 Thembela KuJehova

Umhubi wahlabelela: “Phonsa phezu kukaJehova umthwalo wakho, uzakukuphasa; akayikuvuma naphakade ukuba olungileyo azanyazanyiswe.” (IHubo 55:22) Igama elithi “umthwalo” embhalweni wesiHeberu ngokwezwi nezwi lisho “isimo umuntu aba kuso,” futhi libhekisela ezinkingeni nasezinkathazweni esingase sibhekane nazo ngenxa yesimo sethu ekuphileni. UJehova uyiqaphela kakhulu imithwalo enjalo kunanoma ubani omunye, futhi angasinika amandla okuyithwala. Ukwethembela kuJehova uNkulunkulu yikona okusize u-Angela ukuba alwe nomuzwa wesizungu. Ebhekisela enkonzweni yakhe yesikhathi esigcwele, uyakhumbula: “Lapho ngiqala ukuphayona, mina nengangiphayona naye sasihlala kude kakhulu nebandla eliseduze. Safunda ukwethembela ngokuphelele kuJehova, futhi lokhu kwencika kuJehova kuye kwangisiza kukho konke ukuphila kwami. Lapho ngifikelwa imicabango engalungile, ngikhuluma noJehova bese engisiza. IHubo 23 belilokhu liyinduduzo enkulu, futhi ngilifunda njalo.”

Umphostoli uPawulu wayenomthwalo omkhulu okwadingeka awukhuthazelele. Okungenani izihlandla ezintathu, ‘wancenga iNkosi ukuba iva elisenyameni lisuke kuye.’ UPawulu akazange asizwe ngokuyisimangaliso, kodwa wasithola isithembiso sokuthi umusa kaNkulunkulu ongafanelwe wawuyomlondoloza. (2 Korinte 12:7-9) UPawulu wabuye wathola nemfihlo yokwaneliseka. Kamuva wabhala: “Kuzo zonke izinto nakuzo zonke izimo ngiye ngayifunda imfihlo yakho kokubili ukuthi kunjani ukusutha nokuthi kunjani ukulamba kokubili ukuba nensada nokuswela. Nginamandla azo zonke izinto ngenxa yalowo odlulisela amandla kimi.”—Filipi 4:12, 13.

Umuntu angawathola kanjani amandla kaNkulunkulu uma ezizwa edumele noma enesizungu? UPawulu wabhala: “Ningakhathazeki ngalutho, kodwa kukho konke izicelo zenu mazaziwe uNkulunkulu ngomthandazo nangokunxusa kanye nokubonga; futhi ukuthula kukaNkulunkulu okudlula konke ukucabanga kuyoqapha izinhliziyo zenu namandla enu engqondo ngoKristu Jesu.” (Filipi 4:6, 7) USandra uyasisebenzisa lesi seluleko. Uyachaza: “Njengoba ngingashadile, ngihlale ngingedwa. Lokhu kunginika ithuba elanele lokuthandaza kuJehova. Ngizizwa ngisondelene kakhulu naye futhi ngingakhuluma naye ngokukhululeka ngezinkinga zami nezinto ezingijabulisayo.” UFrances yena uthi: “Ukulwisana nemicabango engalungile kuwumqansa. Kodwa ukutshela uJehova imizwa yami ngokukhululekile kungisiza kakhulu. Ngiyaqiniseka ukuthi uJehova unesithakazelo kunoma yini engase iphazamise inhlalakahle yami engokomoya nengokomzwelo.”—1 Thimothewu 5:5.

“Qhubekani Nithwalelana Imithwalo Esindayo”

Phakathi kobuzalwane bobuKristu akudingeki sizithwalele sodwa imithwalo esindayo. “Qhubekani nithwalelana imithwalo esindayo, kanjalo nigcwalise umthetho kaKristu,” kunxusa umphostoli uPawulu. (Galathiya 6:2) Lapho sihlangana namaKristu esikanye nawo, singathola “izwi elihle” lesikhuthazo elingawenza lula umthwalo oyisizungu.—IzAga 12:25.

Cabanga futhi ngalokho imiBhalo ekushoyo ngendodakazi kaMahluleli uJefta. Ngaphambi kokunqoba kwakhe amabutho akwa-Amoni ayeyizitha, uJefta wenza isithembiso sokuthi uzonika uJehova owokuqala kwabendlu yakhe oyakuphuma ezomhalalisela. Kwaba indodakazi yakhe. (AbAhluleli 11:30, 31, 34-36) Nakuba kwakusho ukuthi kwakumelwe ihlale ingashadile, idele nesifiso sayo esivamile sokuba nomkhaya, indodakazi kaJefta yazithoba ngokuzithandela kulesi sithembiso, futhi yakhonza endlini engcwele eShilo ukuphila kwayo konke. Ingabe ukuzidela kwayo akuzange kuqashelwe? Kunokuba kungaqashelwa: “Kwaba yisimiso kwa-Israyeli ukuba amadodakazi akwa-Israyeli aye yonke iminyaka ukuyitusa indodakazi kaJefta wakwaGileyadi izinsuku ezine ngomnyaka.” (AbAhluleli 11:40) Yebo, ukutusa kungabakhuthaza labo abatuswayo. Ngakho-ke, masingayeki ukutusa labo abakufanelekelayo.

Kuhle nokucabangela isibonelo sikaJesu. Nakuba kwakungelona isiko lamaJuda ukuxoxa  nabesifazane, uJesu wahlala isikhathi esithile enoMariya noMartha. Kungenzeka ukuthi babengabafelokazi noma abesifazane abangashadile. UJesu wayefuna ukuba bobabili bajabulele izinzuzo ezingokomoya zokuba ngabangane bakhe. (Luka 10:38-42) Singasilingisa isibonelo sikaJesu ngokuthi sihlanganise nodadewethu abangokomoya abangashadile emibuthanweni yokuzijabulisa, sihlele nokusebenza nabo emsebenzini wokushumayela. (Roma 12:13) Ingabe bayakwazisa ukunakwa okunjalo? Omunye udade wathi: “Ngiyazi ukuthi abazalwane bayangithanda futhi bayangazisa, kodwa ngiyajabula lapho bebonisa isithakazelo esikhethekile kimi.”

“Njengoba singenaye umuntu othi thina,” kuchaza uSandra, “sinesidingo esikhulu sokuthandwa, ukuzizwa siyingxenye yomkhaya ongokomoya wabazalwane nodade.” Ngokusobala, uJehova uyabakhathalela abanjalo, futhi sisuke sibambisana naye uma sibenza bazizwe bedingeka futhi bethandwa. (1 Petru 5:6, 7) Ukukhathalela okunjalo ngeke kungaqashelwa, ngoba “onomusa kompofu utsheleka uJehova, nomsebenzi wakhe [uJehova uNkulunkulu] uyawubuyisela kuye.”—IzAga 19:17.

“Yilowo Nalowo Uyothwala Umthwalo Wakhe Siqu”

Nakuba abanye bengasiza futhi nokusekela kwabo kungaba isikhuthazo esikhulu, “yilowo nalowo uyothwala umthwalo wakhe siqu.” Nokho, uma sithwele umthwalo oyisizungu, kumelwe siqaphele izingozi ezithile. Ngokwesibonelo, singanqotshwa isizungu uma siba onkom’ idla yodwa. Ngakolunye uhlangothi, singasinqoba isizungu ngothando. (1 Korinte 13:7, 8) Ukupha nokuhlanganyela izinto nabanye yindlela engcono yokuthola injabulo—noma ngabe izimo zethu zinjani. (IzEnzo 20:35) “Anginaso isikhathi esiningi sokucabanga ngokuthi nginesizungu,” kusho omunye udade oyiphayona elikhuthele. “Lapho ngizibona ngiwusizo futhi ngimatasa, angizizwa nginesizungu.”

Kumelwe siqaphele nokuthi isizungu singasenzi sakhe ubuhlobo obungenangqondo. Ngokwesibonelo, yeka ukuthi kungadabukisa kanjani ukuvumela isifiso sokushada sisiphuphuthekise singaziboni izinkinga eziningi ezibangelwa ukushada nomuntu ongakholwa, noma singasinaki nakakhulu iseluleko esingokomBhalo sokugwema ijoka elinjalo! (2 Korinte 6:14) Owesifazane ongumKristu ohlukanisile wathi: “Kunento eyodwa embi kakhulu kunokungashadi. Ukushada nomuntu ongafanele.”

Inkinga engenakusonjululwa kungadingeka ibekezelelwe, okungenani okwesikhashana. Ngosizo lukaNkulunkulu, umuzwa wokuba nesizungu ungabekezelelwa. Njengoba siqhubeka sikhonza uJehova, kwangathi singaqiniseka ukuthi ngolunye usuku zonke izidingo zethu ziyokwaneliswa ngendlela engcono kakhulu.—IHubo 145:16.

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Isizungu singanqotshwa ngokupha nokuhlanganyela izinto nabanye