Ukulondoloza Ubungane Ezweni Elingenalo Uthando

“Nginiyala ngalezi zinto, ukuba nithandane.”—JOH. 15:17.

1. Kungani amaKristu ekhulu lokuqala kwakudingeka ahlale engabangane abakhulu?

 PHAKATHI nobusuku bakhe bokugcina emhlabeni, uJesu wakhuthaza abafundi bakhe abathembekile ukuba baqhubeke bengabangane. Ngabo lobo busuku wayethe uthando abanalo ngomunye nomunye lwaluyobabonakalisa njengabalandeli bakhe. (Joh. 13:35) Abaphostoli kwakuzodingeka bahlale bengabangane abakhulu ukuze bakwazi ukukhuthazelela ukuvivinywa ababesazobhekana nako futhi bafeze umsebenzi uJesu ayesezobanikeza wona. Nembala, amaKristu ekhulu lokuqala aziwa ngokuzinikela kwawo okungenakuntengantengiswa kuNkulunkulu nakomunye nomunye.

2. (a) Sizimisele ukwenzani, futhi ngani? (b) Imiphi imibuzo esizoxoxa ngayo?

² Yeka ukuthi namuhla kuyinjabulo kangakanani ukuba yingxenye yenhlangano yomhlaba wonke enamalungu alingisa isibonelo esabekwa yilawo maKristu ekhulu lokuqala! Sizimisele ukulalela umyalo kaJesu wokubonisa uthando lweqiniso komunye nomunye. Nokho, phakathi nalezi zinsuku zokugcina, abantu abaningi abathembekile futhi abalubonisi uthando. (2 Thim. 3:1-3) Ngokuvamile ubungane babo abuqinile futhi bungobobugovu. Ukuze silondoloze uphawu lwethu njengamaKristu eqiniso, kumelwe singathonywa izimo zengqondo ezinjalo. Ngakho, ake sicabange ngalokhu okulandelayo: Busekelwephi ubungane  obuhle? Singabathola kanjani abangane abahle? Kunini lapho kungase kudingeke sibuqede khona ubungane? Singabulondoloza kanjani ubungane obuhle?

Busekelwephi Ubungane Obuhle?

3, 4. Siyini isisekelo sobungane obuqine kunabo bonke, futhi ngani?

³ Ubungane obuqine kunabo bonke busekelwe othandweni ngoJehova. INkosi uSolomoni yabhala: “Uma othile engase akwazi ukuhlula umuntu oyedwa kuphela, ababili ndawonye bangase bakwazi ukumelana naye. Nentambo emicu mithathu ayinakugqashulwa ngokushesha.” (UmSh. 4:12) Lapho uJehova engumucu wesithathu ebunganini, lobo bungane buyohlala isikhathi eside.

⁴ Yiqiniso, labo abangamthandi uJehova nabo bangaba nobungane obuhle. Kodwa lapho abantu bezwana ngenxa yothando bobabili abanalo ngoNkulunkulu, ubungane babo buyohlale buqinile. Uma kuba nokungezwani, abangane beqiniso bayophathana ngendlela ejabulisa uJehova. Uma abaphikisi bakaNkulunkulu bezama ukuhlukanisa amaKristu eqiniso, lezi zitha zithola ukuthi ubungane bawo abunakuqedwa. Kuwo wonke umlando, izinceku zikaJehova ziye zabonisa ukuthi zincamela ukufa kunokuba zidalule abafowabo.—Funda eyoku-1 Johane 3:16.

5. Kungani ubungane obabuphakathi kukaRuthe noNawomi bahlala isikhathi eside?

⁵ Akungabazeki ukuthi ubungane obanelisa kunabo bonke esingaba nabo yilobo esibakha nalabo abathanda uJehova. Cabanga ngesibonelo sikaRuthe noNawomi. Ubungane balaba besifazane bungobunye bobungane obuhle kakhulu okukhulunywa ngabo eBhayibhelini. Kungani baba abangane isikhathi eside? URuthe wabonisa isizathu salokho lapho ethi kuNawomi: “Abantu bakini bazoba ngabantu bakithi, noNkulunkulu wakho abe nguNkulunkulu wami. . . . Sengathi uJehova angenza kanjalo kimi futhi anezele kukho uma mina nawe siyohlukaniswa enye into ngaphandle kokufa.” (Ruthe 1:16, 17) Kusobala ukuthi uRuthe noNawomi babemthanda ngokujulile uNkulunkulu, futhi bavumela lolo thando ukuba luthonye indlela ababephathana ngayo. Ngenxa yalokho, uJehova wababusisa bobabili.

Indlela Yokuthola Abangane Abahle

6-8. (a) Ubungane obuhlala njalo buwumphumela wani? (b) Ungasithatha kanjani isinyathelo kuqala ekwakheni ubungane?

⁶ Isibonelo sikaRuthe noNawomi sibonisa ukuthi ubungane obuhle abumane nje buzenzakalele. Kufanele busekelwe othandweni ngoJehova. Kodwa ubungane obuhlala isikhathi eside budinga ukuzikhandla nokuzidela. Ngisho nezingane zandawonye ezikhulekela uJehova kudingeka zizikhandle ukuze zibe abangane abahle. Ngakho-ke, ungaba kanjani nabangane abahle?

⁷ Thatha isinyathelo kuqala. Umphostoli uPawulu wakhuthaza abangane bakhe ebandleni laseRoma ukuba ‘balandele inkambo yokungenisa izihambi.’ (Roma 12:13) Ukulandela inkambo engokoqobo kuhilela ukuthatha izinyathelo eziningana, ngokulandelana. Ngokufanayo, ukungenisa izihambi kuhilela izenzo eziningana  ezincane, ezenziwa njalo. Akekho umuntu ongakwenzela lokhu, nguwe luqobo okumelwe ukwenze. (Funda izAga 3:27.) Enye indlela ongangenisa ngayo izihambi iwukulungisa ukudla okuvamile bese umema abantu abahlukahlukene ebandleni. Ingabe ungakwenza kube umkhuba wakho ukubonisa amalungu ebandla umoya wokungenisa izihambi?

⁸ Enye indlela ongathatha ngayo isinyathelo kuqala sokuthola abangane iwukumema abantu abahlukahlukene ukuba basebenze nawe enkonzweni. Lapho ningena emzini futhi uzwa ohamba naye ekhuluma ngokusuka enhliziyweni ngothando lwakhe ngoJehova, kuyazenzakalela ukuba uzizwe umthanda ngokwengeziwe lowo muntu.

9, 10. UPawulu wasibekela siphi isibonelo, futhi singamlingisa kanjani?

⁹ Yanuleka. (Funda eyesi-2 Korinte 6:12, 13.) Ingabe wake wafikelwa umuzwa wokuthi akekho umuntu ebandleni ongamenza umngane? Uma kunjalo, kungenzeka yini ukuthi umbono wakho ngomngane ulinganiselwe kakhulu? Umphostoli uPawulu wasibekela isibonelo esihle sokwanuleka. Kwake kwaba khona isikhathi lapho ayengeke akucabange nakukucabanga ukuba umngane womuntu ongeyena umJuda. Nokho, waba “ngumphostoli ezizweni.”—Roma 11:13.

¹⁰ Ngaphezu kwalokho akazange agcine ngokuba nabangane abangontanga yakhe. Ngokwesibonelo, yena noThimothewu baba abangane abakhulu nakuba babengalingani ngeminyaka futhi benezizinda ezingafani. Namuhla, intsha eningi iyabazisa ubungane enabo namalungu asekhulile ebandleni. UVanessa osanda kweva eminyakeni engu-20 uthi: “Nginomngane engimthanda kakhulu oneminyaka eyevile kwengu-50. Ngimxoxela noma yini engingayitshela abangane abangontanga yami. Ungithanda kakhulu.” Ubungane obunjalo bakheka kanjani? UVanessa uthi: “Kwadingeka ukuba ngimfune lo mngane, ngingamane nje ngilinde ukuba azizele.” Ingabe uzimisele ukwakha ubungane nabantu abangebona ontanga yakho? Ngokuqinisekile uJehova uyokubusisa ngemizamo oyenzayo.

11. Yini esingayifunda esibonelweni sikaJonathani noDavide?

¹¹ Yiba qotho. USolomoni wabhala: “Umngane weqiniso ubonisa uthando ngaso sonke isikhathi, futhi ungumfowabo womuntu ozalelwe isikhathi sosizi.” (IzAga 17:17) Lapho ebhala lawo mazwi, kungenzeka ukuthi uSolomoni wayecabanga ngobungane uyise uDavide ayenabo noJonathani. (1 Sam. 18:1) INkosi uSawule yayifuna ukuba indodana yayo uJonathani ibe inkosi kwa-Israyeli ngemva kwayo. Kodwa uJonathani wakwamukela ukuthi uJehova wayekhethe ukunikeza uDavide lelo lungelo. Ngokungafani noSawule, akazange abe nomona ngoDavide. Akazange aphatheke kabi lapho uDavide edunyiswa,  noma akholelwe amanga amabi uSawule ayewasakaza ngoDavide. (1 Sam. 20:24-34) Ingabe sifana noJonathani? Lapho abangane bethu bethola amalungelo athile, ingabe sijabula nabo? Lapho bebhekene nobunzima, ingabe siyabaduduza futhi sibasekele? Uma sizwa abantu behleba ngomngane wethu, ingabe siyashesha ukukukholelwa abakushoyo? Noma, ingabe sivikela umngane wethu ngobuqotho, njengoJonathani?

Lapho Ubungane Kudingeka Buphele

12-14. Abanye abafundelwayo babhekana nayiphi inselele, futhi singabasiza kanjani?

¹² Lapho umuntu ofundelwayo eqala ukwenza izinguquko ekuphileni kwakhe, angase abhekane nenselele enkulu endabeni yabangane. Kungenzeka ukuthi unabangane abangaphili ngokuvumelana nezindinganiso zeBhayibheli zokuziphatha. Esikhathini esedlule, kungenzeka ukuthi wayechitha isikhathi esiningi nabo. Nokho, manje uyabona ukuthi izinto ezenziwa abangane bakhe zingaba nethonya elibi kuye, futhi unomuzwa wokuthi kudingeka anciphise ubudlelwane bakhe nalabo bangane. (1 Kor. 15:33) Noma kunjalo, angase abe nomuzwa wokuthi uma ebalahla uyobe akathembekile.

¹³ Uma ufundelwa iBhayibheli futhi ubhekene nale nselele, khumbula ukuthi umngane weqiniso uyojabula lapho uzama ukuthuthukisa ukuphila kwakho. Angase afune ngisho nokuhlanganyela nawe ekufundeni ngoJehova. Ngakolunye uhlangothi, abangane ababi ‘bayoqhubeka bekuhlambalaza’ ngoba awusaqhubeki uhamba nabo niye “echibini elifanayo eliphansi lokuzitika ngamanyala.” (1 Pet. 4:3, 4) Empeleni, akuwena ongathembekile kodwa yibo.

¹⁴ Lapho umfundi weBhayibheli elahlwa abangane bakhe bangaphambili abangamthandi uNkulunkulu, amalungu ebandla angasivala leso sikhala. (Gal. 6:10) Ingabe ubazi ngamagama abantu abafundelwayo ababa khona emihlanganweni? Ingabe ngezinye izikhathi uyazinika isikhathi sokuba nobudlelwane obakhayo nabo?

15, 16. (a) Kufanele sisabele kanjani uma umngane eyeka ukukhonza uJehova? (b) Singalubonisa kanjani uthando lwethu ngoNkulunkulu?

¹⁵ Nokho, kuthiwani uma umngane esinaye ebandleni ekhetha ukufulathela uJehova, mhlawumbe kudingeke asuswe ekuhlanganyeleni? Isimo esinjalo singacindezela kakhulu. Echaza indlela azizwa ngayo lapho umngane wakhe omkhulu eyeka ukukhonza uJehova, omunye udade wathi: “Kwaba sengathi kuvuleke isikhala esikhulu enhliziyweni yami. Nganginomuzwa wokuthi umngane wami ugxilile eqinisweni, kodwa kwakungenjalo. Ngazibuza ukuthi ingabe wayekade ekhonza uJehova ukuze nje ajabulise abakubo? Ngabe sengiqala ukuzihlolisisa. Ingabe ngangikhonza uJehova ngezizathu ezifanele?” Lo dade wabhekana kanjani nalesi simo? Uthi: “Ngaphonsa umthwalo wami kuJehova. Ngizimisele ukubonisa uJehova ukuthi ngimthanda ngobuqotho, hhayi ngoba nje enginika abangane enhlanganweni yakhe.”

¹⁶ Asinakucabanga ukuthi singahlala singabangane noNkulunkulu uma singasohlangothini lwalabo abakhetha ukuba abangane bezwe. Umfundi uJakobe wabhala: “Anazi yini ukuthi ubungane nezwe bungubutha noNkulunkulu? Ngakho-ke, noma ubani ofuna ukuba umngane wezwe uzenza isitha sikaNkulunkulu.” (Jak. 4:4) Singabonisa ukuthi siyamthanda uNkulunkulu ngokumethemba ukuthi uyosisiza ukuba sibhekane nokulahlekelwa umngane uma siqotho kuYe. (Funda iHubo 18:25.) Udade ocashunwe ngenhla uyifingqa kanje  le ndaba: “Ngafunda ukuthi asinakwazi ukwenza umuntu ukuba asithande noma athande uJehova. Kakade lokhu kuyisinqumo somuntu siqu.” Nokho, yini esingayenza ukuze silondoloze ubungane obuhle nalabo abasasele ebandleni?

Ukulondoloza Ubungane Obuhle

17. Abangane abahle bakhulumisana kanjani?

¹⁷ Ukukhulumisana kulondoloza ubungane. Njengoba ufunda ukulandisa kweBhayibheli ngoRuthe noNawomi, uDavide noJonathani, uPawulu noThimothewu, uzophawula ukuthi abangane bangempela bakhulumisana ngokukhululekile kodwa ngendlela enenhlonipho. Ngokuqondene nendlela okufanele sikhulume ngayo nabanye, uPawulu wabhala: “Amazwi enu ngaso sonke isikhathi mawabe nomusa, ayoliswe ngosawoti.” Wayebhekisele ngokuqondile endleleni okufanele sikhulume ngayo nalabo “abangaphandle,” okungukuthi abangebona abafowethu abangamaKristu. (Kol. 4:5, 6) Ngokuqinisekile, uma kudingeka sikhulume ngenhlonipho nabantu abangewona amaKristu, kangakanani-ke abangane esinabo ebandleni!

18, 19. Kufanele sisibheke kanjani noma isiphi iseluleko esisithola kumngane ongumKristu, futhi isiphi isibonelo abadala base-Efesu abasibekela sona?

¹⁸ Abangane abahle bayayazisa imibono yomunye nomunye, ngakho indlela abakhulumisana ngayo kudingeka ibe nomusa futhi ingagwegwesi. Inkosi ehlakaniphile uSolomoni yabhala: “Ngamafutha nempepho okwenza inhliziyo ijabule, nobumnandi bomngane womuntu ngenxa yeseluleko somphefumulo.” (IzAga 27:9) Ingabe usibheka ngale ndlela noma isiphi iseluleko osithola kumngane? (Funda iHubo 141:5.) Uma umngane ezwakalisa ukukhathazeka ngenkambo ethile oyithathayo, usabela kanjani? Ingabe ubheka lokho akushoyo njengesenzo somusa wothando, noma ingabe uyacasuka?

¹⁹ Umphostoli uPawulu wayenobuhlobo obuhle nabadala basebandleni lase-Efesu. Kungenzeka ukuthi abathile kubo wabazi kusukela beqala ukuba amaKristu. Nokho, emhlanganweni wokugcina nabo, wabeluleka ngokungagwegwesi. Basabela kanjani? Laba bangane bakaPawulu abazange bacasuke. Kunalokho, bakwazisa ukubakhathalela kwakhe, futhi baze bakhala lapho bezwa ukuthi ngeke besaphinde bambone.—IzE. 20:17, 29, 30, 36-38.

20. Umngane onothando uyokwenzenjani?

²⁰ Abangane abahle abagcini nje ngokwamukela iseluleko esihlakaniphile kodwa babuye basinikeze. Yebo, kudingeka siqonde ukuthi kunini lapho kudingeka khona ‘sinake izindaba zethu siqu.’ (1 Thes. 4:11) Kumelwe siqaphele nokuthi ngamunye kithi “uyozilandisela kuNkulunkulu.” (Roma 14:12) Kodwa lapho kudingeka, umngane onothando uyomkhumbuza ngomusa umngane wakhe ngezindinganiso zikaJehova. (1 Kor. 7:39) Ngokwesibonelo, ubuyokwenzenjani uma uqaphela ukuthi umngane wakho ongashadile useqala ukusondelana nomuntu ongakholwa? Ingabe ubuyokwesaba ukuveza ukukhathazeka kwakho ngenxa yokungafuni ukulimaza ubungane benu? Noma, uma umngane wakho engasinaki iseluleko sakho, ubuyokwenzenjani? Umngane omuhle ubeyofuna usizo kubelusi abanothando ukuze asize umngane othathe isinyathelo esingalungile. Ukwenza kanjalo kudinga isibindi. Nokho, ubungane obusekelwe othandweni ngoJehova ngeke bulimale phakade.

21. Yini sonke esiyoyenza ngesinye isikhathi, kodwa kungani kubalulekile ukuba silondoloze ubungane obuqinile ebandleni?

²¹ Funda eyabaseKolose 3:13, 14. Ngesinye isikhathi, siyokwenza izinto eziyokwenza abangane bethu babe “nesizathu sokukhononda” ngathi, futhi nabo bayosho noma benze izinto ezisicasulayo. UJakobe wathi: “Sonke siyakhubeka izikhathi eziningi.” (Jak. 3:2) Nokho, ukuqina kobungane bethu akunqunywa ukuthi sonana kangaki kodwa ukuthi sithethelelana ngokuphelele kangakanani. Yeka ukuthi kubaluleke kangakanani ukuba sakhe ubungane obuqinile ngokukhulumisana nangokuthethelelana ngokukhululekile! Uma sibonisa uthando olunjalo, luyoba “yisibopho esiphelele sobunye.”

Ungaphendula Kanjani?

• Singaba kanjani nabangane abahle?

• Kunini lapho kungase kudingeke siqede khona ubungane?

• Yini okumelwe siyenze ukuze silondoloze ubungane obuqinile?

[Imibuzo Yesifundo]

[Isithombe ekhasini 18]

Babusekelwephi ubungane obuqinile bukaRuthe noNawomi?

[Isithombe ekhasini 19]

Ingabe uwubonisa njalo umoya wokungenisa izihambi?